Do I hear wedding bells in their future? Only time will tell.
Drew’s chaos and Jackson’s stability shouldn’t work. And yet, they balance each other out. Drew pulls Jackson out of his comfort zone. Jackson grounds Drew, giving him something solid to hold on to.
So, here’s my message to the Ice Queen, who’s probably frothing at the mouth right now: Consider yourself scooped,bitch. Find a new obsession. There’s nothing to expose here. Drew and Jackson’s story isn’t about scandal or drama, or which body parts look best in athletic wear. It’s about two guys who became friends while playing supportive besties, then realized they were each other’s lobster all along.
Sarah Piper is a junior majoring in journalism and not gloating (okay, maybe a little) and saw this coming from day one. She can be reached at [email protected] or at The Brew, where she’ll be celebrating BSU’s newest power couple with an obscene number of cherries atop her ice cream.
ICE QUEEN BLOG POST #2
The Truth Behind the Thaw
Posted by The Ice Queen | February 2nd | 9:34 AM
Hey there, puck bunnies! Ice Queen here, your go-to gal for the coolest takes on all things Barracudas.
Some of you might have read Sarah Piper’s little puff piece in yesterday’s Gazette. Adorable, really. She thinks she “scooped” me. She believes that writing a fluff article about Drew and Jackson’s romance makes her some kind of real journalist.
Here’s what Miss Piper conveniently forgot to mention: Drew Larney and Jackson Monroe have spent the past two weeks vehemently denying they were together. I have screenshots. I have witnesses. Hell, I have a video of Drew at The Brew last Tuesday telling anyone who would listen that he and Jackson were “just friends, for fuck’s sake.” And now, suddenly, they’re soulmates? Jackson’s talking about voids being filled, and Drew is saying that Jackson’s “the guy he’s been looking for his whole life”? I’ve seen more convincing performances in the Drama Department’s production ofCats.
First, the Polar Bear Plunge happens, and everyone starts talking about their “moment” in the blanket. Then, they deny, deny, deny, but the campus won’t let it go, so they decide to admit the truth? That they’ve been dating exactly as we all suspected, right when the pressure reaches its peak?
I smell bullshit, and it’s not coming from the agricultural sciences building.
Unlike Sarah “One Source” Piper, I’m launching a full investigation. If these two are faking it, I’ll find the proof.
Because here’s the thing about me that Sarah doesn’t understand—I don’t report gossip. I expose truths. I’ve taken down student government presidents, revealed faculty affairs, and documented more athletic scandals than the administration would care to admit. A fake relationship between a hockey horndog and a quarterback? Child’s play.
Sarah can keep her cherry-topped ice cream and her exclusive locker-room access (oh yes, I know about that little quid pro quo). I’ll take the truth over access journalism any day. And “Scooped, bitch”? How delightfully juvenile. I’ll be sure to use proper grammar when I destroy your credibility.
Until next time,
Ice Queen skating off!
I hit publish, and satisfaction courses through my veins. The post goes live immediately, and within seconds, the view counter begins to climb.
One hundred. Five hundred. One thousand.
They think this is about petty campus drama, but it’s about the truth and not letting people manipulate the narrative for their own benefit.
I pull up Drew’s Instagram on my laptop. His latest post shows him and Jackson at Mickey’s Diner, sharing milkshakes like they’re in a 1950s rom-com. The comments are nauseating. Heart emojis and “couple goals” as far as the eye can see. But I see what others miss—the way Jackson’s smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes, how Drew’s hand on the table is positioned rather than natural.
There’s only one way to know for sure if Drew and Jackson are truly dating. Put their relationship to the test.
Round one starts now.
AN EMAIL FROM THE ICE QUEEN
FROM: [email protected]
SUBJECT: Charity Event Opportunity
Oliver,
I’m reaching out on behalf of the Berkeley Shore Community Foundation. We’re organizing a charity roller disco dance competition at Spinfinity Roller Rink to raise funds for muscular dystrophy research. Given the hockey team’s incredible showing at the Polar Bear Plunge, we’d love to have the Barracudas pair up with someone in the spirit of Valentine’s Day and participate.
Entry is $20 per person, with all proceeds benefiting charity. The event runs from 8 PM to midnight on February 14th, with a trophy and a $100 gift card to the Lobster Shack for the pair with the best performance. We’re hoping for strong participation from both the Greek and athletic teams to maximize donations.
