Mark stood to greet them, his hands open infront of him.“Alex, hi.Is everything okay?”
“No, it’s not,” the man responded.“What thefuck has been going on between you and my son?”
Not words any man wanted to hear from anangry parent, but even worse for a gay man.For a priest.Marktried to keep himself calm.He’d done nothing wrong, and he had tostay focused on Alex’s wellbeing.“I’m not sure what you mean.Would you like to go back to my office and we can discuss it?I cansee if the rector is available, if you’d like…he’s the person Ireport to.My boss.”
“So he can help you cover it up?I know aboutyou church types.I read the paper, you know!”
“Is there someone else you’d like to invite?A police officer, maybe?”Might not be a bad idea to have onearound in case the man got violent.“But does Alex need to beinvolved?Maybe we could discuss it as adults…”
“Oh, so you realize that he’s just a kid?From what he’s said, I wasn’t so sure!”
Finally, Alex broke in.“Dad, it’s a youthgroup.That’s the whole point of it.If he didn’t think I was ayouth I wouldn’t have been in the group.”
The man dropped Alex’s arm and stepped closerto Mark before growling, “So what the fuck do you think you’redoing, telling him he’s gay?Telling him he needs to ‘come out’ and‘be honest’ about it all?He’s a fucking kid!He doesn’t know whathe is!”
Mark’s relief was short lived.The man wasn’taccusing him of molesting the boy, apparently, so that wassomething.But Mark could have defended against that charge, andthere would have been no reason for Alex to be hurt.This,though…this wasn’t based on a stupid misunderstanding.This wassomething deeper and uglier.“Mr.Wilson, this isn’t a conversationthat the whole town needs to hear about, is it?Let’s go back to myoffice.”
“I think the whole towndoesneed tohear about it!If this church is pushing a gay agenda, pressuringkids to be something they’re not—”
“If that’s the case, I’m sure you’ll be ableto get some attention to your cause without this kind of publicexposure for Alex.”That was maybe a little strong, but there werea few parishioners in the nave, and they were certainly taking aninterest in the scene unfolding in front of them.In a small town,it wouldn’t take long for word to spread.“If hehasmade amistake or been unduly influenced, we want it kept as quiet aspossible, right?”
Mr.Wilson didn’t look pleased, but he didn’targue, at least not directly.Instead, he cast a disgusted look inhis son’s direction.Based on Alex’s lack of response, it probablywasn’t the first time the two had interacted in this manner, andMark wished there was some way to comfort the son withoutantagonizing the father.“Fine,” Mr.Wilson finally grunted.“Butyou’d better get your…what’d you call him?Your boss.I want totalk to him, for sure.And his boss too.”He stepped even closer toMark and hissed, “I’m going to make you sorry.I’m going to makethis huge.”
Mark managed to bite back any sort ofresponse and led the way to the back of the church.He fought offan inexplicable urge to queen it up, to put a sashay in his walkand wave his hands with a little extra enthusiasm as he held thedoor for Mr.Wilson.It was a stupid, childish impulse, and herejected it firmly, if somewhat regretfully.
The little parade came to an indecisive haltin the foyer where the part-time church secretary worked.It wastoo bad she wasn’t there that day—surely even Mr.Wilson would havetried to control his anger in front of a sixty-somethinggrandmother.Instead, Mark leaned into Terry’s doorway and quietlysaid, “Have you got a minute?There’s a bit of a situation—”
Mr.Wilson didn’t wait for Terry’s answer.Instead, he pushed past Mark into the small office and said,“You’re the one in charge?You’re his boss?Fine, I’ll talk to you,then.He can go.I don’t want to spend any more time with him thanI have to.”
Terry’s face showed no surprise at this turnof events.Instead, he gave his most peaceful, beatific smile andsaid, “I’d be happy to discuss your concerns, of course.But Ithink Father Webber should stay.It’s only fair for him to hearyour complaints first hand, isn’t it?”And then thecoup degrace—the move Mark had seen Terry make many times whenconfronted with belligerence.The man pushed away from his desk anddropped to his knees.“But first, if you don’t mind, I’d like totake a moment for a prayer.I’d be happy if you’d join me, or leadthe prayer if you’d like.”He smiled up at Mr.Wilson.“I findprayer soothing, and it will help prepare me for ourdiscussion.”
Mark knelt quickly and dropped his head,peripheral vision making him aware that Alex was mirroring hisactions.There was no rustle of movement to suggest that Mr.Wilsonwas doing the same, and Mark tried to imagine the man standingthere staring down at the other three, the expression of confusionthat must be on his face…but that wasn’t what Mark was supposed tobe doing.Just like the rituals of the Eucharist, there was theatrein all of this, but it mustn’t be empty dramatics.Mark couldn’tpretend to pray just for effect—he had to actually do it.So hecleared his mind, found the words, and ran over them in his mind.One repetition and he was calmer.His pulse was slowing and hecould feel the heat draining from his face.A second run-through tobring him back into himself and find his center.A third and then afourth repetition to strengthen his resolve and his tranquility,and then, the magic moment.As he repeated the familiar words forthe fifth time, Mark allowed himself to reach out to God.And as Healways had been, God was there waiting and Mark felt the warmth ofHis love and acceptance.He only allowed himself to bask for amoment before sending thoughts of gratitude and then pullinghimself back.“Amen,” he said quietly.
When he looked up, the others were waitingfor him.Terry smiled gently while Mr.Wilson and even Alex lookedat Mark as if he were crazy.Instead of irritation, he feltcompassion for them.Anyone struggling through the world withoutknowing the love of God must find it a terrifying place indeed.Itwas no wonder Mr.Wilson was easily frightened, and from that,easily angered.“I’m sorry,” Mark said as he rose to his feet.“I’mnot sure what I’ve done to make you feel uncomfortable, but Iapologize for it.”He knew from long experience that histranquility wouldn’t last forever, but he’d make the most of itwhile he could.
Mr.Wilson looked disconcerted by the entiresituation.“You apologize?”He stared at Mark for a moment beforemanaging to dredge up his resentment.“Youapologize.Fortwisting my son’s mind, recruiting him for—”
“Dad, stop!”Alex’s expression was pained.“Itold you!”He turned to Mark and said, “I swear, I told him.Somany times!”He shook his head and looked back at his father.“I’mgay.I came to the youth group because I’m gay, and I wanted totalk to someone about it.A kid I know said Father Mark was a goodlistener.That’s all.He didn’t turn me gay!He hasn’t recruited mefor anything!”
“I saw your computer, Alex!”
Now Alex was speaking to Terry as if hopingfor a judgment in his favor.“My grandparents bought me that forChristmas last year!It’s mine!”
“They bought it so you could do homework!Notso you could look at—” Mr.Wilson broke off, then apparentlydecided to follow his son’s lead in appealing to authority.Heturned to Terry and said, “You should have seen the filth he waslooking at.Disgusting pornography—”
“It wouldn’t have been disgusting if it hadbeen a man and a woman, though, right, Dad?You wouldn’t havedragged me down here if it had been straight porn!”
“Down here?No.If it had been straight pornI would have dealt with you myself.But since it wasn’t straightporn…yeah, I needed to figure out who’s been putting these ideas inyour head.”He looked accusingly at Mark.“Obviously I didn’t haveto search very hard.”
“You really think I need someone to tell meto look at porn, Dad?Like it’s not all over the internet, justwaiting?”
“It’s not just pornography that I found.”Mr.Wilson was talking to Terry again.“He’d been looking up newsarticles, and at first I thought, ‘good, he’s using it for school,’but then I looked a little closer.The articles were all about thesame person, and when I asked him about it…” He looked at his sonas if replaying the words in his mind, then shook his head.“Youwouldn’t believe the nonsense he came up with.And thisson-of-a-bitch…this pervert who’s trying to get his claws into myteenage son?He’s connected to your church as well.He lives inyour halfway house.Someone here got him a job at the place myteenage boy volunteers!What the fuck is wrong with youpeople?”
Alex was the first to speak.“I told you,Dad.He’s not a pervert.I’m the one chasing him.He’s shutting medown.He’s being nice about it, but…” He shook his head and lookedsadly at Mark.“Nothing’s happened, and I really don’t thinkanything ever will.”
Well, that was a relief.But Mr.Wilsondidn’t seem satisfied.“This is a church for fuck’s sake!My boysaid he wanted to join a church youth group and…well, I wasn’tthrilled about it.Would have liked to see him on a hockey teaminstead, but you have to raise the kid you got, not the one youthought you were going to get.Right?”
“I think you’re very lucky to be raising aboy like Alex,” Mark said quickly.He could feel his serenitydraining away and tried to regain his compassion for the man infront of him.“I’m sure it’s frightening to think about somethinglike this.It’s unfamiliar, and unexpected.”
