Mark sighed.“He’s still not doing well.Theinformation I was able to find…” But that had been generic internetsearching.He was standing in front of a person who had a lot ofexperience with elderly people and their medical issues.“Ourparishioners.The ones you see in the hospital.Two weeks after astroke, aren’t they usually getting better?Out of intensive care,at least?”
“What do the doctors say?”
“They say they were hoping for more, but thisisn’t outside of the realm of expectations.”
“Well, that sounds reasonable to me.”Terry’sgaze was assessing, and it occurred to Mark that the expression onTerry’s face was becoming quite familiar.Mark had seen it oftenback when he’d first started at the church—Terry had been trying tounderstand his new priest and determine his strengths andweaknesses.But after years of working together, they’d gotten toknow each other and there’d been no need for that sort of judgment.Until a few months ago, at least.But then Mark had made a mistake,and lost some of Terry’s trust.He hadn’t lost the man’s affection,he was quite sure.Terry still cared.But he wasn’t sure how Markwould react to things anymore.
It stung to realize it, and it hurt Mark’spride to think that he was no longer a completely trusted colleagueand professional.But there was something else, a tiny whisper inMark’s mind that almost seemed to be celebrating.Good,itsaid.He’s realized he can’t take you for granted.It was aridiculous thought and Mark dismissed it as completely and asquickly as he could.
“I’m just impatient, I suppose,” he said withan apologetic smile.“It would be nice to have a littlecertainty.”
“Of course.This is a very stressful time,for you and your mother.How’s she holding up?”
“She’s strong.It’s a blow, and she’s had toomany of those lately.But she’s hanging in there.”Mark looked downat his watch, then shuffled a few steps in the direction of themeeting room.“I don’t want to miss the end of youth group.I’msure they’re fine without me, but I’d like to check in.”
“Oliver’s been working hard with them.Hedoesn’t have your natural gift, maybe, but he’s makingheadway.”
Oliver was on loan from the seminary, tryinghis hand at the practical side of the ministry before returning tohis academic world.He was a pure theologian, all abstract thoughtand prayers with no interest in reality.Certainly no interest inthe compromises and struggles of teenagers.But that wasn’t whatMark was supposed to say, or even to think.“He’s conscientious.Ifhe’s been assigned the task, I’m sure he’ll do his best.”
Terry waited as if expecting Mark to saymore, then nodded in dismissal.“Well, I’m sure the kids will behappy to see you.”
So Mark made his way down the hall to the“new” part of the building—the addition built in the fifties whenthe church had been booming.Generations had spent parts of theirlives in the central meeting room: dances, wedding receptions,euchre tournaments, and, of course, the youth group.There wereonly four young people there that day, huddled in one of thecorners listening more-or-less patiently as Oliver finishedspeaking.
Alex was the first to notice Mark’s arrival,and the expression on his face made Mark’s sneaking aroundabsolutely worthwhile.“Hey!Father Mark!”He scrambled to his feetand almost ran across the floor toward Mark.“You’re back!”Heleaned in a little closer and said, “For good?”in a hopeful buttactfully quiet voice.
“Just stopping in.”Mark spoke loudly enoughfor the whole group to hear.“I hope I’m not interrupting anything,Father Williamson?”
There was neither malice nor amusement inOliver’s voice as he said, “It’s probably a good time for a break,anyway.”
Alex’s eye roll was subtle but unmistakable.A few months earlier he’d been a mess, cycling between abjectdepression and manic agitation, but now he was confident, beingcheeky and mildly disrespectful.It was a beautiful transition, andMark wanted to hug the boy, or at least smile back at him.Instead,he played the responsible adult and frowned in light disapproval atthe boy’s antics.Alex didn’t seem put off, but Mark felt a pang atnot sharing the joy.There was so much life in Alex, especiallycompared to the people Mark had been spending his time withlately.
“I need to talk to you,” Alex whisperedurgently, but he sounded excited, not alarmed.“Something big.No,not really.But maybe.”He glanced over his shoulder toward Oliver,then looked back toward Mark.“You’ll understand.”
In spite of himself, Mark was intrigued.Andmaybe a little flattered.There it was again, that pride that hehad to keep such a tight rein on.He was nothing special, not inhimself.But if the Lord had chosen to allow a special bond to formbetween him and some of his young charges, the Lord surely wouldn’tmind if Mark enjoyed it.“Okay,” he said.“How much longer for yoursession?”
“I’m done now,” Alex said firmly.He turnedback to Oliver.“Thanks for your time, Father Williamson.I don’tthink I’m going to make it to the next meeting, though.It’s abit…a bit God-y, you know?”
Oliver raised an eyebrow.“What exactly wereyou expecting from a church-run youth group?”
“It’s what I was expecting,” Alex saidquickly.“But not what I’m looking for right now.Thanks, though!”He grinned at Mark and turned toward the door.“It’s what I wasexpecting until I went to that first meeting with you.”His voicewas too quiet for Oliver to hear, but Mark still cringedinternally.It wasn’t like their usual youth group sessions weregodless bacchanals, but maybe they did stray a little too far fromthe religious principles of the sponsoring organization.After all,the church not only owned the space they used, it also paid Mark’ssalary.
He looked back at the other three teenagerssitting with Oliver.They had sometimes come to the meetings whenMark had run them, but they hadn’t been regulars.Maybe they hadn’tbeen getting what they were looking for from Mark.Maybe he shouldhave been focusing on spiritual instruction rather than emotionalsupport.After all, Alex could have spoken to a guidance counseloror a psychologist or he could have phoned a hotline, for goodnesssake.There were countless places a teenager could go to find asympathetic ear about emotional strife, but far fewer where theycould find religious guidance.Mark hadn’t meant the groan thatescaped from him to be more than a deep exhalation, but apparentlyit was loud enough to catch Alex’s attention.
“You okay?”The kid cocked an eyebrow as ifhe were genuinely interested in an answer but didn’t really expectMark to give one.
“Do you ever get caught in your head, Alex?So many ideas spinning around that you never seem to be able topick just one and stick with it?”
Alex nodded seriously, then grinned.“Sometimes.And I know how to solve it too, but I’m not sure ifyou’ll approve of the answer.”
“I’d appreciate hearing about it atleast.”
Alex leaned in and Mark mentally bracedhimself.Sure enough, when Alex spoke, his voice was almost agiggle.“I think about sex,” he whispered.“Amazing how that’llpush every other thought right out of my brain.So I think aboutthat for a while, and then…you know…when I’mdonethinkingabout it, I’m ready to go back to whatever else I’m supposed to beconcentrating on.”
“I see,” Mark said dryly.
“Are you allowed to?You know…to…” Alexraised his eyebrows suggestively.
“This is not an appropriate conversation,”Mark said firmly.“And you had some news to share with me?Something that might be a big deal?”
