Bridei worked hard to keep his voice even and calm, and not rise to the obvious provocations. “You don’t know that. I have done my due diligence where she is concerned. Whoever she is, she is not a spy for Ecgfrith.”
“So you admit that you don’t even know who she is? How stupid can you be? Thinking with your cock! She willruinyou!”
Sten was trying everything to get a reaction from him, to make him turn and fight for the woman’s honor and make himself look like a love-sick fool in front of his men. He wasn’t going to fall for it.
“Iknowwho she is. You don’t need to be worrying about the lass. Worry instead about rallying the army. They have to want this victory every bit as much as I do.”
“Your army whispers around the fires at night of their king’s weakness for a lass.”
“Then they need to get more rest. We have a battle soon.”
By the end of the day, after hours of arguing with himself in his own mind, Bridei resolved that he would stay away from Nessa until after the battle. She was just too much of a distraction, and he doubted his own resolve to work as hard as he needed to if he could have her in his arms instead. It was for the best. Then, if he still wanted to, he could, and would, pursue her with everything he had.
For now, he would move her into his roundhouse, let her do as she would, and avoid crossing paths with her so that he wouldn’t be tempted to throw her up against the nearest wall and relive the soul-shattering depths of the kiss they’d shared. Because he knew that he wouldn’t be able to walk away twice from a kiss that felt so good and so perfect down to his very soul. No, the next time he kissed her, there would be no stopping. He would knowallof her.
To his undeniable credit, his resolve lasted four whole days.
Everythingwas different now. Nessa was no longer consumed with a finding a way to return home, since the possibility was all but gone. Namet had let her look through the scrolls in the trunk (with Bridei’s permission of course), and just as she suspected, she couldn’t decipher them, and she probably wouldn’t be able to even if she studied them for years. He had also taken her back to the well, so that she could finally put to rest even the slightest possibility of an open door.
Now that all choice in the matter was taken from her, she had found a certain peace in knowing she had tried her best. She had done everything she could think of to go home to Gram and to Nathan, and it was impossible. All she could do now was try to make some sort of a life and be happy here.
And since she had been officially cleared of spying or any other treachery, people were treating her very well. Many of the women were making overtures of friendship, and her relationship with Veda was blossoming. She even took up a role for herself in the community; she loved to garden, and she was good at growing food. And Bridei had given her the little round-house where she had been taken on her first day, as her own place to stay.
She tried not to think about the king. The night he had kissed her, she would have let him do anything at all to her, and in truth she had hoped he would take her back to his chamber. That kiss…it had transformed her. Somehow, with only his lips and tongue, Bridei had branded her. She would never be exactly the same as she was before.
But now that she had had time to reflect, she realized she had been grief-stricken that night, and not thinking clearly. Luckily, he had walked away, and his parting words made it clear where she stood.“I don’t want a child to come of my weakness.” Despite the attraction between them, he obviously didn’t want to risk being tied to her in any way. And she certainly didn’t want to be like Lair; desperate for any affection he might toss her way.
It had been several days now since he had kissed her, and she had barely seen him since, except from a distance. She tried not to think too much about that, either. After all, he was preparing for a battle that would define his entire kingship. Of course he didn’t have time to socialize.
Nessa decided she needed to try to put the whole incident behind her. She wouldn’t pine over someone who didn’t want her for more than a sexual conquest, and she definitely didn’t want her heart to end up broken, so she spent all the time she could with Veda and the other women, and kept busy. And if he filled her dreams all night so that she woke up each morning desperately aching for him, then she refused to admit it to herself.
Though she was allowed complete freedom to come and go during the day, Namet came and locked her in at night, although he said it was only for her own safety. If Bridei still believed she might run away, Namet never said anything.
But then, on the fourth day, Bridei sent for her. Namet told her the King wanted her company for dinner. Nessa told herself again and again that he probably just wanted to see how she was adapting to her new life at Tallorc, but she couldn’t stop her heart from racing or the butterflies from swarming in her stomach. They were the same butterflies that had been there since the first time she’d seen Bridei, but they seemed to have grown larger of late, and perhaps even reproduced, so that it felt like they were barely contained.
When she was ready, Namet led her to the hall. Bridei was already sitting there at a small table, speaking with a man she didn’t recognize. When he saw her, their eyes locked from across the room, and Nessa was suddenly hyper-aware of every sound and color, and even the feel of the air on her skin. He was dressed in a dark red tunic, and his hair was loose around his shoulders, long and nearly black; the same color as the fierce tattoos across his cheekbones.
As she walked over to him, the man he had been speaking to nodded and moved away. Bridei watched her with dark eyes, gesturing to the chair across from his. She sat down, and immediately they were served food and wine. Nessa wasn’t sure she would be able to eat, she was so nervous. Bridei pushed her cup of wine closer and offered her a small smile.
“I’m in need of distraction tonight, Ashta. I am weary of the constant company of my soldiers.”
“Oh…okay.” He wanted only her company. Good. That’s all she wanted from him.
He folded his hands on the table between them. “We’ll talk. Tell me more about your home. Yourrealhome. It is not in Fife.”
“No.” She picked up her cup and took a tiny sip. “Inverness.”
He sat back in his chair. “So you lied to me?”
“No! Aye…but not on purpose, I mean…I didn’t know who you were, or where I was, or…”
Bridei laughed softly. “Hush. I’m only playing with you. But tell me more.”
She scowled at him, but couldn’t stay mad. “Well, I lived with my grandmother on her farm. I was…a gardener…a farmer. I grew food to sell, and I looked after my uncle. My grandmother raised me and taught me everything that our family was supposed to know. Everythingyoutold us to know.”
His gaze softened. “Aye, I could not have known what would come of it, but I’m glad I listened to Meara.”
The longer they sat near each other, the more the air seemed to sizzle and hum between them. Breathing felt ever more difficult, and Nessa couldn’t seem to keep her eyes from drifting to Bridei’s lips. His mouth was firm yet soft, and it had felt so good against hers.
