She had nowhere to look except for his eyes. How she had ever thought they were cool was beyond her. Theo’s eyes burned into hers now, seeing straight through to her weakness and exposing pieces of her she had buried a long time ago. Shame burned her now because she knew what she had to do.
“Fine,” she said. “You want to play this game? Dare.” She held his eyes in a silent challenge. She knew what he was doing. He never let her hide herself from him. Even the parts of her she didn’t like, he forced her to face them head on.
"I dare you to give us a chance," he said evenly. She could still feel him pulsing inside her. God, she would miss this. She would misshim.
She blinked the wetness from her eyes and lifted her chin. “I pick the truth then.”
“Do you love me?" His voice was quiet now.
She couldn’t lie. “I don't want to play this game. You win.” She saw the devastation on his face, and it was too much. “I quit.” She lifted herself off him and stood.
“Amber,” he said. "Don't do this."
"Goodbye, Theo." She got up and went to her bedroom, closed the door, laid on her bed in her new dress, and stared up at the ceiling.
Her head ached where Neal had pulled it. Her body was tender where Theo had been inside her. It was merely a nuisance in the face of the crushing pain in her chest.
How funny that just hours earlier she had started the night with yet another version of herself, a stripped down, authentic version that needed no pretense or bravado.
And now, in her bedroom alone, she wanted to pull every flimsy scrap of fabric from her closet and pile it on herself as if they were bandages she could wrap the broken pieces of her heart in.
Relationships, pets, and kids. How silly she must be to think this time would be any different when the only thing that had changed was her wardrobe.
Tears filled her eyes. She tried to keep them open as long as she could so they wouldn't spill over, but eventually, when she heard the door close, her body betrayed her.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Theo satin the chair opposite his grandmother, Georgie, in her formal living room. The slurp of the straw in her strawberry milkshake broke the silence.
“Rummy!” Georgie slapped down her cards for him to inspect.
“Well done.” He scooped the cards up to shuffle. “Up for another round?” He shuffled the cards deftly. It was Sunday morning, a week after the gala. Theo had spent a sleepless week working until his eyes burned and running for miles until his body was sore and exhausted. Still, he heard her words, over and over again.
I quit.
Even louder, he heard what she didn’t say. No ‘I love you’ from Amber.
He concentrated on shaping the cards into submission.
“No,” Georgie said. Theo looked up. Georgie hadn’t been up for meeting him out at their usual breakfast spot when he called. Theo had picked up take out and came to her instead. She looked ever tinier than usual across from him. “It’s no fun tobeat you when you look like a wounded puppy. What happened? Everything was so lovely when I left you two last week, and then everything imploded.”
Imploded was a good word for what happened this week.
The morning after the gala, Pippa released the photo of Amber, Neal, and Theo, along with a headline: ‘Campaign Chaos: Mayor Theo Clairmont’s Alleged Love Triangle Shocks Northfield.’ When word got out that Neal had been fired for his inappropriate conduct toward Amber, his fall was steep and swift. Professional contacts, family, and friends distanced themselves until he fled the state in disgrace.
The rumor mill continued speculating, and more articles hit the news cycle. Someone, Theo was almost certain it was Addison, came forward with a “tell all” about Theo’s dating life. It was mostly nothing, but the town Facebook page had been buzzing about it nonstop.
To round out the shitstorm, Puddin’s owner came forward to lodge a complaint that Theo had stolen his dog. He didn’t actually want Puddin’ back, Theo was darkly amused to learn, but he “wanted it known what kind of man the mayor was.”
The campaign’s trajectory had taken a nosedive ever since. Charlotte and Todd were working overtime to manage the PR crisis, but Beckerman’s polling numbers had skyrocketed while Theo’s were solidly in the toilet.
It was everything Amber had feared happening, yet Theo found himself indifferent to the chaos.
Georgie walked to the piano and began to play. The music filled the room, and he drifted in the notes for a while.
“I’m sorry, Georgie,” he said after a while. “I might have ruined my chance at being reelected.”
Georgie’s fingers stilled. “Oh, Theodore,” she said tenderly. “Don’t you know that doesn’t matter in the long run? All we’veever wanted was for you to be happy. That’s your legacy more than anything else.”
