I couldn't even turn to face her. "Can't fall asleep. What about you?"
"Same." She sighed. "Do you miss home?"
So, that's what was bothering her. She probably missed her family and her little dog.
"A little, but I like it here," I said. "It's quiet. I know that the peacefulness is misleading, but I still prefer it to the constant hum of Vedona."
"What's it like to live in a big city?" she asked.
"The auroras are barely visible because of the city lights. It's warmer, less windy, noisier, and the people are friendlier."
She chuckled. "Elucians are friendly too, we are just rougher around the edges, and we don't offer our friendship to just anyone. You have to earn it."
"Did I earn yours?"
I wanted more than friendship from her, but since I couldn't have it, shouldn't have it, I would settle for that.
There was a moment of silence. "Of course, you did. How can you even ask that?"
Oh, right. I'd played the hero when I helped her and Shovia leave the square after the explosions.
She huffed out a breath. "You drank tea at my grandmother's table, for Elu's sake. Do you think she would invite just anyone into her private space? My family embraced you, Alar."
I swallowed. "Thank you," I said, not sure it was the right answer. "It means a lot to me. I just didn't know that getting invited to your grandmother's back room was such a big deal."
There was another long moment of silence. "I guess the differences between Elurians and Elucians run deeper than I thought."
If I were an ordinary Elurian, I might have known that getting invited into someone's private space was meaningful, but since my family routinely hosted people who were not our friends, I assumed that was the norm.
"Things were different in my household," I finally admitted, even though I shouldn't have.
"Can you two be quiet?" Codric grumbled. "I'm trying to sleep."
Despite the snoring, he'd probably listened to the entire conversation and had realized that I was about to reveal too much.
"Sorry," Kailin said. "Good night."
I lay awake, thinking about my brothers and what they were up to while trying to ignore the hunger pangs. I must have dozed off eventually because the next thing I knew, something cold was landing on my face. Opening my eyes, I saw snowflakes drifting down through the aurora-lit sky. I pulled the hood of the sleeping bag over my head and was surprised how warm I wasinside my cocoon, but worry about tomorrow's trek gnawed at me.
The snow would make the trail even more treacherous.
I thought of my ambitious plan and all the things that rode on its success. I couldn't fail, and I couldn't give up, but as another wave of dizziness washed over me, even lying down, I was starting to think that my determination alone would not be enough to see me through this.
There was no shame in admitting defeat as long as I gave it my all, but it would be beyond disappointing to realize that the voice in my head that had been spurring me forward and promising me a dragon bond had been wrong.
28
KAILIN
The snow fell silently through the night. I lay awake in my sleeping bag, acutely aware of Alar's steady breathing beside me, his presence both comforting and unsettling. When I finally fell asleep, I expected to dream of him, but instead, I dreamt of massive wings and dark, mesmerizing eyes with golden flakes swimming in their irises.
Ipaused writing to collect my thoughts. Why was I still dreaming about that rider? I had seen him once, and the encounter had lasted mere seconds, but evidently, it had left a mark on my soul. Shaking my head, I sharpened my pencil using my pocketknife and continued my journal entry.
The mountain air grows thinner as we climb higher, and today, our true battles begin—Alar's against the altitude that makes each breath a struggle, and mine against the fear of narrow paths that fall away into nothingness. The other pilgrims stride confidently along the trail's edge, as if the lethal drop means nothing to them, while I press myself against the mountain face, avoiding even an accidental glimpse of the void beside us.
—From the journal of Kailin Strom
By mid-morning, I noticed that there was something wrong with the auroras. They wavered and danced overhead as usual, but instead of their usual flowing ribbons, they were forming odd shapes. A sheep with a newborn lamb, a face that looked a lot like our shaman's, with a winking eye. Dragons that looked like worms with wings that twisted in impossible angles. I blinked hard, trying to clear my vision, but the hallucinations persisted.
