"The bubble of silence the shaman created," I said, the words tumbling out. "During the ceremony at the Circle of Fate. Do you think it was real or just the tea making us imagine it?"
Alar seemed momentarily thrown by the abrupt change of subject, but he recovered quickly. "It felt very real to me."
"What did the shaman tell you?" I asked, realizing he'd never told me.
With all the commotion of being chosen, the dragon flight, and our arrival at the academy, I'd forgotten to ask.
I hadn't even asked Shovia, and she hadn't asked me, which was not like her. Maybe we weren't meant to share our fates with each other.
A guarded expression fell over Alar's features. "That's a secret between me and the shaman."
"A secret?" I echoed. "Is that your retaliation on account of me keeping secrets with Commander Ravel?"
"I would never be so petty," he said, though the slight quirk at the corner of his mouth suggested he wasn't entirely serious. Then his expression sobered. "It's just that what the shaman told me is deeply personal and shouldn't be shared."
I felt a flicker of hurt, but I understood. The things that Saphir had told me seemed so vague right now that I wasn't sure I could even repeat them.
"That's okay." I sighed. "I guess a little bit of mystery makes it more interesting. Although in my case, it's just a little, and in your case, it's a lot."
Also, my secrecy was imposed upon me—his was a choice.
"You two should stop blabbering and finish eating." Shovia gestured to our nearly full plates. "You don't want to be light-headed from hunger when you're hundreds of feet in the air."
The reminder sent another jolt of anxiety through me, but I nodded and returned my attention to my meal, and Alar to his.
As I worked my way through the stew, I stole glances at Alar, wondering what the shaman could have told him that was so personal he couldn't share it. What secrets did he carry behind those thoughtful eyes? And why did it bother me so much that he was keeping them from me?
Was it because I already had enough secrets of my own to manage? The ability to communicate with dragons—a gift that marked me as a potential shaman—was a heavy burden, and I couldn't share any of it with the people I cared about most.
"You've gone quiet," Alar observed, breaking into my thoughts. "Nervous?"
I nodded. "The thought of getting back on a dragon... I'm not sure I'm ready."
"You'll be fine," he assured me. "It's going to be like the flight over here. We will be sitting behind or in front of our instructors, and they will be in full control. We just need to sit back and enjoy the ride."
"You make it sound so simple."
"Because it is. You just have to trust the dragon and the rider."
"I do." I trusted Onyx and I trusted Commander Ravel, but my fear wasn't rational, and I had very little control over it.
57
ALAR
"As massive wings unfurl like great sails, the world below dissolves to haze. Mountains bow and rivers bend. No chains remain, no tether holds. There is only sky, me, and Vaxsiuth."
—Commander Arella Drayden
The cadets from the previous pilgrimages led us up the stone staircase that seemed to go on forever, spiraling upward through the heart of the Citadel. Codric complained under his breath about the never-ending climb, but I welcomed the exertion—anything to burn off the nervous energy that had been building in me since lunch.
"I'm not in the market for a new guy," Kailin had said to me. "I've already found the one I want."
I hadn't expected that, and I was still flabbergasted by her admission. She wanted me just because of who I was, not what I was or what I could do for her. She still had no idea that I was a prince.
I should be ecstatic, elated, and I was, but I was also uneasy. Perhaps because I knew I was undeserving.
Kailin climbed a few paces ahead of me, her back straight and her shoulders tense, probably because she feared what was coming. I wanted to reach out to her and offer reassurances, but I stifled the urge, respecting her need to fight that particular battle on her own, or perhaps I was just realizing that nothing I could say would help.
