Unconvinced that he meant it, she said confidently, ‘All right, Mr Lothario. Enjoy the view while I enjoy my book.’
She smoothed some deep conditioning treatment through her hair and tied it up in a headscarf. She wanted her hair in tip-top condition for the wedding; there were only a couple of days to go until the big day, and all the sea and sun had frazzled her ends.
After the races ended, everyone flopped back onto the sun loungers for a rest.
Richie came out to the pool and started talking to Alex about a new script he’d just received from a top Hollywood producer. Alex kept giving her side looks, as if seeking her approval, which she deliberately ignored.
‘Listen, this would be a guaranteed blockbuster,’ snapped Richie, obviously irritated by Alex’s lack of attention.
‘But a move back to LA?’ Alex glanced at Ellie. ‘I’m not sure if that’s what I want.’
Why was he looking at her? She had no right to an opinion when it came to his next career move. Of course she wanted him to stay in London, but friendship wasn’t enough of a reason for him to stay.
‘Things change,’ Richie said thoughtfully. ‘This would only be for a few months, if that…’
She didn’t want to listen to Richie any more. The inflatable unicorn called to her and, after pondering how she’d actually get in it, she realised that she could sit on it from beside the pool and then launch herself like a Viking ship, using only her feet. There was a helpful cup holder and headrest built in, so she could relax for a while before she had to paddle back to the side.
She launched, and was so pleased with herself that she took a sip of her drink and leaned her head back against the headrest with a heavy exhale of satisfaction.
This was the life.
Until, of course, it suddenly wasn’t.
Her bikini strap with its dangling beads was digging into her hip, so she wiggled her bum to free it. Unfortunately, that caused a chain reaction of epic proportions.
She tipped to the side uncontrollably with a plastic farty squelch, and held up her drink trying to save it – why that suddenly seemed so important to her, she wasn’t entirely sure. But the lilo made a terrible screech and swayed too far. She threw her body back, desperate to stop herself sliding into the water. Icy, sticky cocktail sloshed across her sun-soaked chest, causing her to gasp and rock once again on the infernal lido, this time backwards, her legs flipping up and over her head. And then, with a final ‘OH GOD!’ she was gone.
Ankles over headscarf. Arse over tit. A full backwards roly-poly, straight into the shockingly cold water, the cocktail still clutched in her hand.
Adding further insult to injury, when she surfaced she was smothered by the lilo now floating above her, white unicorn plastic surrounding her. The artfully placed headscarf was now a wet sloppy mass. She struck out at the unicorn, wishing the glass in her hand was a knife.
The unicorn had the audacity to bounce off the side of the pool and smack her right back in the face, dunking her once again under a wave of plastic and water. There was a chorus of gasps and sniggers from the side of the pool as she resurfaced, but she couldn’t quite see clearly through the headscarf’s soggy fabric. A messy cloud of orange cocktail and creamy hair conditioner floated in the water around her.
‘Are you okay, Ellie?’ called Alex, as a mostly horrified cast of Hollywood stars looked on from their sun loungers. Of course, hateful Holly was cackling loudly, but honestly, that wasn’t unexpected – she was surprised they weren’t all in hysterics.
‘I’m fine.’ She whipped the unravelling scarf off her head, and half swam, half doggy-paddled to the steps, unable to do either very well with her hands full.
As she strode up the steps, there a sudden and dangerous loosening of her bikini bottoms fabric. She stopped dead and clamped her thighs together as if she were about to wet herself. ‘No!’
Jessica and Robert King – Hollywood legends – were directly in front of her on their sun loungers. They leaned forward with obvious concern. ‘What’s wrong, darling?’ drawled Jessica.
The other side of her bikini gave up its hold on her hip and dropped as well, the beads slapping wetly against her thigh.
‘NO!’ She hunched forward to protect her privates, clutching the glass and scarf to her front. But her bottom? There was nothing she could do – all hope was lost.
The tropical breeze fanned over her wet and naked bum cheeks. Mortified, Ellie wondered what the hell she was going to do. If she bent to put down the glass and scarf, she risked exposing herself in an even more terrible way to the Hollywood stars behind her. If she dropped the glass, it would shatter all over the pool steps and cut her feet to shreds. She wasn’t even convinced that, if she dropped the scarf, the glass wouldn’t fall too – it was all so tangled together.
She heard Alex shout from behind, ‘I’m coming!’, followed by a splash. A quick glance behind her shoulder showed that he was cutting through the water like an arrow.
‘I hope not,’ muttered a deep voice, and there were a couple more stifled sniggers, then a slap followed by an ‘Ouch!’ and then a ‘Behave!’
Was that his parents?
Like an Adonis from the sea Alex emerged dripping wet, golden and beautiful. He strode towards her huddled form and with calm efficiency re-tied the straps on her bikini bottoms.
‘Am I dead?’ she whispered.
‘No.’
