‘It was just a peck, nothing serious. Just for show.’
Nanna raised a snowy eyebrow and Ellie took a sip of her water. A telltale flush crept up her neck. Nothing about that kiss had been casual – she still didn’t understand it.
Nanna placed a hand on her arm. ‘We’re only worried, darlin’. This sounds like you’re playing with fire, and David—’
‘This is not the same!’ she yelled, and her nanna’s hand retreated. Immediately, she apologised. ‘I’m sorry, I know you both mean well. But it’s not the same.’
She’d had a wonderful night at the Olivier Awards. Sure, the press were making comments about her body, but that was to be expected. She would ignore them, and have a magical holiday with Alex.
She was happy. Why did her mother have to spoil everything?
‘And all this time you’ve taken off work, to run away on holiday with him. You’re putting your life on hold, for a man you barely know, and what’s to guarantee he’s going to keep hispromise about the flat?’ asked her mum, trying to play good cop for a change.
Ellie pursed her lips at that, and her nanna gave her a look of warning. How many times had her mother bent over backwards for the men in her life? And those men hadn’t even offered to buy milk. Her mum’s relationships had been a hellish merry-go-round of hope and despair, with her kids picking up the pieces of her broken heart every time.
‘Even if he doesn’t buy me a flat, I’m still going to the Bahamas, aren’t I? That alone would be worth it. It’s not like we’re rolling in money, is it?’ She suspected her mum already knew about the money troubles with the shop. She’d also bet that her mum knew she was helping Mark financially. She’d seen them talking over his business plans the other day, and she’d stepped out of the room again as if it were completely normal, even though Ellie had never been involved in the big decisions before. It was infuriating that her mother was happy to throw around opinions on stuff that didn’t matter, but was tight-lipped when it came to the fate of their family business.
Her mum paused, her face flaming. ‘But you have to ask yourself. Why did he pickyou?’
‘Angela, that’s enough!’ exclaimed Nanna, but it was already far too late.
Regardless of the cold looks from both sides of the table, her mum continued, ‘I’m just making sure she understands the risk. She could be made into a laughing-stock again, and for what? Some man she barely knows.’
Ellie dropped her phone in her bag, stood, and slung it over her shoulder. She didn’t care if she had to stand outside waiting to be picked up for an hour. She wouldn’t take another minute of this. ‘David was a coward and an arse. You act like I was to blame for what he did, that I somehow deserved it. Why?’
Her mum became flustered. ‘I just don’t want you to be taken advantage of again—’
‘No. You think that someone like Alex couldn’t possibly want to be with someone like me. I must be a joke, right?’ The white heat of anger and resentment boiled through her veins.
‘She’s not saying that, love,’ said Nanna, reaching for her arm.
Ellie walked towards the door, knocking down her sunglasses from the top of her head to hide the tears that were already threatening to fall. ‘I am not unhealthy. I am not ugly. I am not hideous.’ She swallowed the burning lump in her throat as she opened the door and turned to face them. ‘I am agoodperson, and I deserve to be happy.’
‘I know that,’ said her mum with a defensive huff.
‘Really?’ she asked, her voice strained. ‘Because you never say it. There always seems to be room for improvement. You’d be pretty, Ellie, if only you lost another twenty pounds. Try this, try that. Starve yourself and then someone might be able to love you, right?’
Her mum looked down miserably at the single boiled egg on her plate. No toast, no butter. A lonely egg in aMorning Sunshinecup. ‘I’m just looking out for you,’ she muttered.
‘Thanks, but I’m a grown woman and I can look after myself. I’m off to eat, drink and wear that skimpy bikini we saw in the shops last week.’ She wanted to live her life, not hate it.
‘Oh God, not the polka dot one!’ gasped her mum, her eyes wide as if an axe-wielding clown had entered the kitchen.
Ellie had admired one in a shop window – and her mother had lamented for ten minutes about how theybothcould never wear such a thing. Ellie had ordered it online that same night.
‘Shut up, Angela,’ Nanna practically growled across the table at her.
Ellie pushed the door fully open. ‘Right, I’m off to the Bahamas. Did I tell you? We’re flying Business.’
She flicked her hair as she walked away, but her nerves were brittle and her chest tight.
Mark must have heard her yelling because he popped his head through the shop doorway as she stomped down the stairs. ‘All right?’
‘Yeah,’ she said with little enthusiasm.
‘Ignore her.’
She nodded.
