"Your man has been hovering around out there almost the whole time, you know," Tessa says.
"He's not my-"
She holds up a hand to stop my denial. "Well, he's sure acting like he is. When he's not stationed out there guarding you like the crown jewels, he's building you a house!"
I sit up. "He's still doing that?"
"Yep. And he's been asking me and all the girls non-stop pregnancy questions. It's quite sweet, actually," she muses, staring unfixed at where she's idly drawing patterns in the sandy dirt ground with a stick and a relaxed smile on her face. "He's like one of those fathers-to-be who would devour that book; What to Expect When You're Expecting."
"But... he's not-"
"I know."
I blink at her for a second or two before flopping back down on the bed. I feel like absolute shit right now and could really do with a hot shower. My back aches from being in bed for a long period of time and I don't even want to think about what my hair looks like right now. But what's worse is the achy feeling in my chest whenever I think about Mavyx. "But doesheknow?"
The silence outside is almost deafening now that I wonder if it's him outside, listening in on this conversation. I don't want to hurt the big guy's feelings, but we need to get things straight. I'm not his. This baby isn't his. This whole thing is fucked up and him being sweet is messing with my head. We need to be clear for both his benefit and mine.
"Oh, trust me, he knows," Tessa says, shaking her head with a grin. "Sat him down and explained it all in great detail. Birds and the bees and all that good stuff."
Why does that make me feel anxious? How did he take the news that I'd had sex and made a baby with someone else?
Why does that even matter? It's not likeIcheated on anyone.
Urgh - I wish I had a pillow to scream into right now.
"In fact," Tessa continues, her face going a little red, "the girls and I sat a whole bunch of Trixikka down for a biology lesson. Seeing that freaky egg-birth the other day was an eye-opener to just how different we are."
"Yeah? How did that go?" I snort.
"Not well," she concedes, "Chastity wasn't much help. I don't think the Trixikka particularly needed to be taught about Daddy kinks and anal play."
That gets a laugh out of me - a proper one.
Someone drops something outside, cursing before everything goes quiet again.
***
Slices of some kind of alien vegetable are brought to me at dusk, along with a bowl of spiced mushed berries that don't taste dissimilar to a sweet-and-spicy, sticky sort of garnish. Had someone... had someone tried to make chips and dip for me? The thought made me smile, and I tuck away a mental note to thank Tessa in the morning. Bea grins as she watches me eat them. They aren't nachos and guac by any stretch of the imagination, but I appreciate the effort and try to eat my whole portion, praying they don't upset my stomach. Bea had eaten with the others and we make small talk as she readies herself for bed. God knows where Chastity is; either getting drunk with Skye again or maybe even giving a lucky Trixikka a live-action biology lesson, who knows?
It's when I'm laying there, peering out of the window-like opening in the hut wall - staring up at the night sky, a bright, twinkling star winking down at me, that I decide enough is enough. Sure, I feel like shit, I have no energy and want to puke more often than I don't, but I can't stay here for the remainder of my pregnancy.
My hand goes to my belly as I stare up at the star, a faint smile lifting my lips a little. It's like my mom is reaching out to me. It's like she's saying she's here for me - no matter what planet I'm on. No matter what galaxy, universe, or physical plane - she won't leave me. I've never been a particularly spiritual person but I know, without a doubt that if there is a way for my mom to be there for me, she wouldn't let anything stop her.
And I'm not going to let anything stop me, I decide in that moment. The sickness, I can't do too much about. The moping around? I can.
Plus, I need to properly bathe so badly, I'm surprised Bea hasn't dumped a bucket of water over me.
Getting up I gingerly try to smooth down my unruly hair. What good it does though, I don't know.
Wandering out of the hut, I'm surprised to find it unguarded. The village is asleep and my mom's star keeps winking down at me from high above. I walk for a while before finding the Trixikka's stash of water from the river. It sits in treated wooden buckets and skins hung from a stand. I'm guessing the ones in the skins are for drinking, but what about the buckets? Water is always just brought to us girls, I don't know what all of this is intended for. I don't want to start washing in water that is meant to be used for cooking in the morning. Plus, these buckets are freakinghuge. No way I'd be able to separate one from the others so that no one uses my dirty water.
I decide to take a skin from where it's hung by a cord and make-shift wooden hook stand. Tipping some into my hand, I manage to spill most of it, but quickly rub what little water I can capture on my face and neck, the cool liquid feeling so good on my heated, clammy skin, I almost groan. Glancing around, I check that the coast is clear and take off my pink pj top and tip some of the water directly on my chest and on my hand again. What I wouldn't give just for some soap right now.
All thoughts of soap flee from my mind when I feel the rush of air of something large dropping down behind me. I let go of the skin, water spilling out onto my feet as my eyes go wide and I open my mouth to scream. A dark shape lunges for me, its big hand coming up to cover my mouth and pull me in close to its huge frame.
Only when I notice the little twinkling skin-stars do I relax even a fraction. It's Trixikka, this thing that's got me in its hold. And only when I notice the pretty gold eyes and lit-up chest do I allow myself to refrain from chomping down on his hand. It's Mavyx. I'm safe.
Although, he did creep up on me in the dark while I was trying to wash and now he's squishing my wet, bare chest right up against his bare chest.
