Everything is quiet for a moment, there's only the faint rustling of the evening breeze through the jungle's leaves and the chirping of alien bugs. I still haven't looked up at Mavyx but I can feel his stare on me. I go to turn, but his big, warm hand stops me and he falls to his knees, making me suck in a breath. In this position, we are almost level with each other, but his eyes are glued to my stomach like I've got the holy grail in there or something.
"You have a... youngling...growinginside you?"
The awe on his face is clear and I swallow thickly.
"My star?" he asks, locking eyes with me for confirmation. My heart jolts in my chest and I nod my head. He's started calling me that and for some reason, I'm scared to call him out of it - scared to even acknowledge it.
But when he slowly, tentatively starts to reach out with careful hands, I just can't handle it anymore. I move away, dodging his touch. "Don't," I whisper, a knot forming in my throat. "I can't," I shake my head like I can make this all go away. I'm feeling all kinds of muddled up right now and this huge, fierce warrior being all sweet with me is just making it harder. He's got lots of questions - of course, he has - but I don't have the energy to deal with them right now. I don't have the energy for much these days, to be honest.
Stepping away, I finally hold his golden gaze. "Goodnight, Second Spear," I tell him before leaving for the girl's hut.
***
Tiredness consumes me for the following two days or so. I stay in the girl's hut, curled up on the nest-bed I've claimed as my own. People - Trixikka and humans - come and go, bringing me food that I don't want, and water that I can only sip on. It's never Mavyx though and I think maybe this whole thing has finally spooked him.
I snort to myself. That's what you get for poking the hornet's nest - a hormonal woman who cries all over you when she finally tells the truth.
It wasn't long until Serena came to visit. "Those Plan-B leaves didn't work, did they?" she had asked. I didn't bother sitting up, only blinked at her from my nest-bed and shook my head. She took my hand. "I thought that was the case, but I didn't want to keep asking. What are you gonna do?"
I shrugged. What can I do?
It's real now.
Mavyx knows.
Serena knows.
Soon, the whole tribe will know.
I can hear my mom's voice in my head, screaming at me to get out of bed and face the world. Face the situation I've been put in.
But I can't. It's like the energy has been zapped right out of me now that I don't need to hide or deny my big secret anymore.
"He's asking after you, you know," Serena had said as she pushed some of my unruly hair behind my ear, the gesture so motherly, I almost wanted to cry.
I didn't cry, though. I didn't say anything - merely shrugged. I know who the 'he' is she's talking about but I don't want to have to think too hard about anything right now. I just want to sleep.
Then the vomiting started again.
And if Serena or Mavyx hadn't told the others about my predicament before, they sure as shit didn't need to anymore.
Bea looks at me with worried eyes as she sits on the edge of the other nest. I turn my back to her, not wanting to see the pity on her face.
"Come on, Bea," I hear Chastity say. "Alana will talk to us when she's ready," she says a little louder for my benefit. "She knows we're here for her when she wants us, but maybe she just wants to be alone for a while."
I'm eternally grateful for Chastity in that moment.
Over the following few days, I continue to get visitors, but I don't feel overly chatty. Tessa came to just sit with me for a while. She spoke quietly and didn't press me to answer. It was comforting to just listen as she explained that her nursing career had mainly been centered around the terminally ill, but she vaguely remembers doing a short stint in a Neo-Natal ward when she was training.
"Pre-natal is a whole other bag of chips," she says, turning her head to smile at me where she sits on the floor, her back resting against my bed. The sunlight streaming into the hut catching on whispy bits of her hair.
"Urgh. Don't mention chips!" I whine, rolling onto my back, and staring up at the same woven-leaf roof I've been glaring at for the past few days.
Tessa snickers. "She speaks!"
"I would kill for chips and some dip right now."
There's a low murmuring from outside, the voice deep and hushed. I turn my head to look up at the little window-like opening in the wall but see only bright blue skies beyond.
