Her eyes darted between me and the trees in our path. “What … are … you saying?”
“I’m saying, when it comes to you, I have no will. You have complete control over me. What’s cute is that you are oblivious to it.”
Silence fell so comfortably around us. Free will versus fate, my mind wondered, transporting back to long discussions with Beck around the fire. Beck’s weakness was knowing what the future held, and it was a weakness because he was the only one to bear that burden. He’d told me once that fate could not be changed, but if I’d known of what lay ahead, the journey to the destination would be altered, and it would cause more harm than good. Beck only told me what I needed to know, when I needed to know it. His mind was in constant torment. Either way, fate may have turned me into this, but Fallon was my choice—my free will.
I refused to believe otherwise.
“So, fate,” Fallon said, interrupting my thoughts.
I cut around a tree. “A justification.”
“Julian,” she groaned, “You don’t believe in free will or fate?”
“Do you?” I asked, and her silence called upon my gaze. I cocked my head back over. “If you believe in fate, Fallon, you’re telling me that whatever may happen to you has been pre-determined and cannot be changed.”
“You’re confusing me.”
I wanted to stop and face her, but we were almost there, and my eagerness to show her why I found such freedom in running was steadfast. “I’m giving you arguments from both sides, which is what you deserve, isn’t it? What we all deserve? You have to decide what you believe in.”
“What do you believe in?”
“I’m still trying to figure that out.” I felt it coming, the strain in my legs, the ache in my chest. “How are you feeling over there?”
“Like … I’m … dying,” she pushed out.
I cut my eye to her, seeing her hanging on by a thread. “Good, because it’s coming.”
“What’s coming?”
“The living part.” I pushed past her, ran faster.
I ran until my legs almost buckled. I ran until my sight became hazy. I filled my lungs with as much air as they could handle as I ran past the pain, unafraid of what was on the other side. Fallon ran beside me—my girl, both stubborn and relentless. And after a few minutes, we broke through to our second wind. I knew she felt it too when a smile stretched across her face.
“This is what I believe in.”
Goody clapped his hands. “Times up, Blackwell.”
Barefoot and bare-chested and in tattered slacks, I was escorted the two miles from Goody Plantation and through the tunnels to the Chambers. Every step of the Heathens was in solidified cadence, the heartbeat of their march echoing in the damp and cold tunnel as we walked in a single file line. I kept my eyes forward, thinking of the mistakes I’d made to get me here. Perhaps I could have been honest with Fallon from the beginning, told her I loved her, maybe realized I loved hersooner—figured this all out sooner.
Woke up sooner. Found myself sooner. I didn’t want to wait until my next lifetime. I wanted this one. We deserved this one too.
“We meet again, and so soon,” Pruitt stated, hands clasped firmly in front of him as Clarence Goody took his seat, joining Viola Cantini and Agatha at the table. “Clarence tells me you have acted alone in breaking into my chamber. Is this true?”
“I have—” I started to say when Clarence interrupted, “Yes, Norse Woods took no part in his schemes.”
I cut my eyes to him.
“Now, Goody, let the man speak for himself,” Viola insisted, gesturing for me to continue.
Clarence cleared his throat, and Agatha’s expression remained stoic, eyes unblinking. I turned my gaze back to Pruitt.
“Yes, I’ve acted alone to retrieve the books from a place they do not belong, as they belong to the Chamber. May I ask what you were doing with the Book of Danvers and Blackwell? My family’s book?” Pruitt’s eyes widened, and Viola looked to Pruitt. “What use is my family book to you, and why can’t I have access to it?”
“I was told it was only the Cantini book,” Viola asked Pruitt in a whisper.
“It was two Norse Woods’ books and yours,” I answered for him honestly.
“It doesn’t matter. You trespassed into our chamber,” Pruitt snapped.
