He looked so defeated.But she knew he was strong, honorable, and selfless to a fault.She got out of her chair and knelt between his feet.His body stiffened, and shame soured her stomach.He’d no doubt been warned of her behavior from Michael.She pushed down her embarrassment and held out her hands, offering them, but not forcing them, just as he’d done for her.He smiled slightly before settling his own on top.
“Last night, you showed me things I didn’t know were possible,” she said, looking down at their hands.“You were kind, patient, honorable, understanding, wise, and so incredibly strong.I was completely naked, and even pushed your hand between my legs, and you didn’t shame me or use me.You didn’t claim my body as your own.Instead, you gave me respect, support, and encouragement, and you carried me through something anyone else would have run from.You have already helped me.”
Skepticism filled his eyes.He wasn’t sure if he could believe her.With a sigh, he squeezed her hands.“I have an idea.I think we may be able to put your sketches to good use.And since Brennan is forcing me to take the day off, it will be the perfect way to spend my time.”
“My sketches?”Dread sent a wave of cold through her.“I’m not sure I want to look at them again.Last time it culminated in me screaming and sobbing on your lap.”
“I think that was good for you, though.As hard as it is, you need to feel those things.The fear and anger that you’ve held in for all this time, it needs to come out so you can let it go, and fill that void with happiness instead.”
She shook her head.She didn’t want them to come out.“I don’t think it’s natural for a woman to behave that way.If I unleashed the full spectrum of the things I know I have buried within me, you’d surely take me back to the asylum.”
His brow dipped ominously.“You were in an asylum?”
She pulled her hands away.
He didn’t stop her, but his hands remained there for her.“Don’t be ashamed, Samantha.And please don’t retreat from me.”
Her heart fluttered with uneasiness.She looked up at his eyes and down at his hands.Slowly, she rested her own back on top of them.“I thought you knew,” she said quietly.
“I purposely know very little about your past.I’d like to know more if you want to share with me, but what’s important to me is your future.”
“You obviously knew that I tried to take my own life.”
“Yes.Your brother wanted me to know that.”
“That’s why he took me to Auburn Ridge.”
“Well, you’re here now, and you’ll never go back to a place like that.”
“You’re not the only one who doesn’t feel worthy here, Trent.I don’t feel worthy either,” she admitted.
He breathed out a sad sigh.“Go get your sketchbook.”
She retrieved the book and walked with him across the grounds to a small barn.There were no animals inside, but a large, cylindrical bag of some sort hung from the rafters.
“This is where I come when I need to release some frustration or anger.”He threw a punch into the bag.The movement and sound startled her, and she took an involuntary step back.
“I will never hit you, Samantha.Not for any reason.And I mean that fully.Not if I’m angry.Not even if you hit me.I will never, ever raise a hand to you.”He squeezed her hand gently.“I brought you out here so thatyoucan let out some emotions.”
Panic flickered through her and cinched around her lungs.“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”She was afraid to bring up those feelings again.Not to mention, she was still embarrassed from the last time.
“Are you willing to try?I’ll be right here if you need my support.”
After a moment, she nodded.His smile filled with pride.Why was he so kind to her?
“That’s the hardest step, and you’ve already conquered it.”
“Now you’re just trying to flatter me so I won’t feel silly.”Even still, warmth blossomed in her cheeks.
“I?”He pressed a hand to his chest.“I would never stoop to such measures.”He winked and she laughed nervously.
“Stand here.”He moved out of the way so she could position herself beside the bag.
“What is this?”She pressed a hand to the canvas.It seemed to be filled with straw.
“It’s my makeshift punching bag.Don’t tell Ash, or the next thing I know he’ll be buying me a proper one.”
Laughing with him lessened some of her worry.“I’ll keep your secrets, Trent.”
