Lex nods, but gives me a look like he’s not buying it. I laugh it off and walk down the stairs to look for Vanian. I check the bathroom, but he’s not there, then I notice him in a corner, talking to a guy. His body language is secretive, like he’s trying to make sure I don’t see him, and the sight makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.
Is he curious about men? If so, why wouldn’t he tell me? Does he think it would change our friendship or something? Or maybe he’s not hitting on the guy. Maybe it’s something else. Drugs? No. No way. I would know if Van was doing drugs, even casually. I’ve had way too much experience to overlook the signs.
Although I’m tempted to interrupt, I force myself to stay put, and about a minute or two later, Vanian comes walking in my direction. He smiles when he reaches me.
“Ready to go?”
I nod. “Yeah. Everything okay?”
Vanian scratches the back of his neck, glancing over his shoulder. “While you were talking to Lex, I saw that guy fromearlier again. He was manhandling this smaller dude and it didn’t look consensual to me. I went over and broke it up. I was talking to the guy it happened to.”
“What did he say?”
“Just like I saw. They were dancing, then the other dude got grabby, then aggressive before I showed up.” He blows out a breath. “Sorry. It’s a huge trigger for me. I can’t sit by and ignore shit like that.”
“I don’t blame you. No need to apologize.”
“I wish I could turn it off, you know? Sometimes, I want to think about myself or nothing at all, but it’s like I’m always on alert looking for dirtbags.”
“It must be frustrating too, since most of the time, you probably can’t do much about it.”
“Yeah.” He forces a smile. “Anyway, let’s get out of here. We need fresh air and water.”
“Yeah we do.”
After making our way through the club, we stand on the sidewalk out front waiting for the ride we called. I can get someone to drive me back here in the morning to pick up my car.
The evening air feels nice, but it’s not doing much to dull the pleasant buzz in my brain. When I feel like this, all I want to do is fuck. Maybe tonight I can knock one out before I go to sleep.
Vanian leans against me, pressing his weight into mine, and I turn my head to look at him. He was cute as a teenager, but he’s something else now. Way better than Gage or even Lex. He’s just not gay. Or queer at all. But if he’d let me blow him, I’d drop to my knees right now in front of everyone.
I must make some kind of noise because Vanian lifts his head. “What’s up?”
“I’m drunk.”
He chuckles. “Me too.” We’re both quiet for a few beats. “This was fun tonight.”
“I agree.”
The car arrives and we both slide into the back seat. Vanian doesn’t waste any time slumping against me with his head back against the seat. It feels good to be close to him again. Good to know we still have what we always did. Nice to know he feels so comfortable with me.
“I’m really glad I bumped into you, Nan,” he says softly.
Patting his thigh, I lean my head back too. “Me too.”
Chapter 11
Vanian
“My buzz hasn’t worn off at all, man.” I plop down on the couch. “I feel good.”
Nantes chuckles, sitting next to me. “I’ll forgive you for keeping your shoes on.”
“Oh shit. Sorry.”
“I’m just fucking with you. I want to change the floors anyway.”
I turn my head and stare at my friend. He’s got his head tilted, resting on the back of the couch, and his eyes are closed. He’s really good looking. Like,reallygood looking.
