I nod, forgetting that he can't see me. "I keep worrying that you’re going to hate this life so much that, at some point in the not-too-distant future, you're going to decide that I'm not worth all of it."
"Not worth—" he starts, his tone sounding angry.
“It's a lot, Will. I am askingso muchof you.”
“You’re not.”
“Come on, don't tell me you weren't filled with dread when you got the Royal Protocol Handbook."
He pauses for a second and the silence speaks for itself. "Okay, I'm not exactly excited about some of the stuff, sure, but every relationship has trade-offs, right?"
"But with me, the trade-offs aremassive. Complicated, ridiculous, pompous, restrictive…"
"Somewhat, maybe,” he says, “But those things are not going to define our marriage. To me, all that stuff is like your job. Thelifewe’re going to build is going to be our own. I can learn proper bowing order and memorize which spoon to use at which course. That’s nothing, really. I don't really care about any of that because, at the end of the day, I’ll be next to you at those stuffy, ridiculous, pompous events. If I can catch your eye and share a grin or whisper things to you that make you laugh, I’ll enjoy every minute."
Tears fill my eyes and slide down my cheeks. Suddenly it hits me that this moment is the most intimate of my life. Even though he and I have been through so much together, this is the most honest I've been with him, or with myself, for that matter. But the truth isn’t sending him running. It’s drawing him closer. And I'm suddenly desperate to be in his arms.
“Belle?”
“Yes?” I whisper.
“Are you crying?”
“Yes.”
“I’d really like to hold you right now. We don’t have to do anything. I just want…to hold you. Can I do that?”
“Yes.” I wipe the tears off my cheeks.
He lets go of my hand and slides the curtain back, his eyes shining with emotion as his gaze meets mine. He sees me. Not my burnt skin or the insane dyed-on bikini. He sees only me. It’s like he’s peering into my soul and he wants to dive in and stay. I swallow hard, trying to stop the tears as he reaches for my face with both hands, cupping my cheeks gently as he leans in to kiss me. His lips are soft and gentle on mine and I’m taken away from everything this world holds—all the fears and insecurities and nonsense. And it’s only Will and me left.
I wrap my arms around his neck and lift my body closer to him, kissing him deeper now, letting him know what I want. His hands slide down my wet body and he dips his left hand into the water, cradling under my knees, while his right hand supports my back. He stands, lifting me out of the tub, not caring if he gets soaked.
He kisses me again, then presses his lips to my forehead and whispers, “You are perfect. Exactly the way you are, no matter what.”
“I love you so much,” I say, my voice almost not even there.
He pulls back and stares into my eyes, the warmth of his arms and the flickering glow of the candles cloaking me in a romantic haze. “This is forever. You know that, right?”
Nodding, I kiss him hard on the mouth, pressing myself against him, wanting to get as close as I can.
“I’m going to take you to bed now, okay? And when we get there, if you want to just hold each other, I’m okay with that.”
I bite my lip and give him a mischievous look. “I’m not.”
“No?” he asks, a wide grin spreading across his face.
“No, I want to do all the stuff.”
“If you insist.”
Chapter 5
Showing Up to a Meeting Unprepared, Neglecting Mama Bear, and Other Bad Ideas…
Will
Royal Wedding Tentative Schedule
