One of the babies gives me a sharp boot to the ribs, reminding me I’m supposed to be maturing. “I suppose I have to ‘rise above it’ instead. Take the high road, and all that.”
“What’s the fun in that?” Nikki asks. “Oooh, what if you started your own movement for women who want to eat whatever the fuck they want?”
I laugh at the idea. “Princess Tessa’s Eat with Wild Abandon Campaign.”
“Loveit,” Nikki says, imitating Dylan.
Suddenly, it’s like a light bulb goes on. One I’ve been waiting on for a very long time. “Actually, Nikki. You may be on to something...”
***
TEXT FROM BRAM:Tessa, any decisions on the babies’ names yet? Irene wants to put a thousand down on the names Edmund if one of the babies is a boy and Madison if one’s a girl because there are fifty-to-one odds on that combo. We could really use the cash because she wants to go to Brazil for a butt lift (which I fully support) but it’s really friggin’ expensive to get there from here and for the surgery.
***
EMAIL FROM HAZEL NETTLEBOTTOMto Me
RE: Weekly Observer Woes
My dearest Tessa,
I hope you're feeling well. It's been quite a while since we've spoken last and much has been happening around the newspaper, none of which is good. I have had to lay off both of our interns, which is never a good sign, since they were both only paid in free coffee.
If there is any way you might be able to provide us with an exclusive on your pregnancy or the babies or anything, for that matter, it would be a huge help to the paper.
Your friend, Hazel
Email from me to Hazel Nettlebottom
RE: Weekly Observer Woes
Dear Hazel,
Whilst it's wonderful to hear from you, I'm truly sorry to hear that it is under such duress that you are writing. I have a feeling we may be able to help each other out. Will you be free in an hour for a phone call?
Your friend,
Tessa
Email from Hazel Nettlebottom
RE: RE: Weekly Observer Woes
Hoorah! I shall be at my desk awaiting your call.
Yours,
Hazel
––––––––
EMAIL FROM ME TO DYLANSinclair
RE: New PR Strategy
Dear Dylan,
Have been thinking of PR strategies and had epiphany last night while watching the news. I won’t be able to make it on Monday as I will be very busy with a new project that is near and dear to my heart. I’ll be collaborating with my ex-boss atThe Weekly Observeron something sure to have a positive effect on my word cloud.
