“Plan on joining me?”
“What? No. I just don’t need you falling over and hitting your head…”
“Breathe, Jo. I was just kidding. Thanks for hanging around and well…you know, everything else.”
“Anytime, Nate.” She shut the door between us and I heard it click. Before I could stop them my fingers were reaching out to flick the lock, but at the last moment, Josie’s plea replayed in my mind. She’d asked me not to lock it, so I wouldn’t. For her.
Staring at the door like an idiot, I was surprised how sober I suddenly felt. I couldn’t be sure if it was the weight of my confession that lightened the load, or the purging my garden had just endured. Either way, it didn’t matter. All I wanted to do now was wash the day off me and climb into bed until it was over.
Shuffling over to the sink, I toed off my shoes and socks before unbuckling my belt. When I noticed my reflection in the mirror, I was embarrassed by what I saw. Even through my blurry vision, I couldn’t miss the bloodshot eyes, unkempt scruff on my chin, and the colour of my skin was freaky. How the hell did I convince Josie to come home with me? She was too damn good for me. Dropping my jeans, I tried to kick them off, but my anger and frustration got the better of me and I started to topple backwards. I was grateful I’d sobered enough to have the reflexes to reach out and grab the counter, but not before sending everything that was on it scattering to the ground.
“What the…”
Josie burst through the door, obviously frazzled.
“It’s nothing,” I denied, completely embarrassed. I was standing in my bathroom, pants around my ankles, mess everywhere, looking like shit, and smelling worse. Then here Josie was all pure and amazing worrying about me. Fuck! She was too good for me.
“Nate…”
I knew that tone. I hated that tone. It was one filled with warning. “Josie, I’m fine.” I didn’t mean to snap at her, I just couldn’t help it.
“Fuck you, Nate. Enough!” Well, if I thought I’d snapped, then she’d just fucking exploded like a volcano. “I’m going to help you get your disgusting, drunk ass in the shower. Then you’re going to get dressed and come and have a cup of coffee with me, and we are going to have a little chat.”
I opened my mouth to tell her to fuck off, I could feel it coming, but the look she shot me silenced me instantly.
Too stunned to move, I remained frozen as Josie stomped into my bathroom and dropped to her knees in front of me. I wished I was cooler. I wished I wasn’t such a fucking guy. I couldn’t help it. And I sure as shit couldn’t stop it. As she untangled my jeans from around my ankles, I was left standing in a shirt and my grey boxer briefs. I hadn’t planned on anyone seeing me in them. And only in my dreams had I imagined Josie on her knees in front of me again. I’d had her in my kitchen, and I’d lost track of how many times I’d imagined her in this exact same position while I’d taken myself in my hand. I hardened at the memory.
“Nate…” Her voice was deep and didn’t help my growing situation.
Rising to her feet, Josie ignored what was right in front of her face. While I’ll admit I was disappointed, I couldn’t say I blamed her. A moment later my shirt was gone, the shower was steaming up the room, and I was staring straight in her eyes.
“I-I got it from here,” I stuttered.
This wasn’t going to work while Josie was in here. I needed some privacy.
“Okay,” she relented, scooping up my vomit-covered clothes like it was nothing. “I’ll go boil the kettle. Get cleaned up. Then we’ll talk.”
“We don’t have to.”
“Yes, Nate. We do.”
Well shit!
After cleaning my teeth twice, I shaved, and shampooed my hair before rinsing off and stepping out. I knew I was dragging my feet, but I couldn’t make myself move any faster. My buzz had worn off and now I was just tired. Crawling into bed and blocking out the world until morning sounded perfect. Hanging the towel back on the rack, I pulled open the door and stepped into the hall. It wasn’t until I heard Josie’s aggravated voice filtering through the house that I remembered I was buck naked and not alone. Scurrying as quickly as I could, I stepped into my bedroom and grabbed a pair of crumpled sweat pants and a soft cotton shirt.
Running my hand through my hair, I stepped up to face the music. Fuck, this was not going to be fun. I think I’d rather have a back, sack, and crack wax than have this conversation. Shame it wasn’t an option.
As I rounded the corner I saw a sight I knew I could get used to. Josie was leaning against the kitchen counter, both hands cradling a steaming mug while she stared blankly out at the night. She was obviously deep in thought. I tried to keep quiet as I snuck in and grabbed my own mug. The clatter of the teaspoon against the side of the cup made her jump.
“Shit, Nate! You scared the crap out of me!”
When she’d jumped in fright, the hot coffee had splashed over the rim, coating her t-shirt. My first thought was she should take it off. I wish I could say that it was in her own best interest that she do it, but it was in mine too. Even through the black polo I could see the way the fabric pulled tight across her boobs, and it had me imagining what she was wearing beneath it. Were they covered in black lace or pure white satin? Forcing down a mouthful of the foul coffee, it was black and strong, and I was usually a white with two kinda guy, it brought my attention back to the issue at hand.
Placing my cup in the sink, I grabbed a nearby tea towel, and before I could stop myself, I was wiping at the damp material. I heard Josie’s breath hitch, and when I looked up and met her eyes, they were no longer the sapphire I’d come to adore, but instead dark with what I hoped was lust. At least if I pretended it was lust, then I knew I wasn’t the only one having those thoughts.
After a few more swipes, Josie wrapped her tiny fingers around my wrist, holding it firm. “I’m good. Thanks.” Her voice was deep and husky, and it had me wishing I’d taken the extra thirty seconds to pull on underwear beneath my sweat pants. Unrestrained, everything below my navel was taking on a life of its own. One I couldn’t control.
“You heading back to work?”
