Had he really stayed, and not touched me the entire time I slept?
Looking down at myself, I took note that my clothes were on. Well, my thin sleep pants anyhow. I was still without a shirt, hence why I had the blanket. Okay, I probably would have the blanket either way.
I didn’t feel like he had used me while I was unaware. That had happened way too many times in the past by others.
“Hello Koda.”
I could only blink, before rubbing my eye again.
What was wrong with me? With him looking at me like that, I felt like I was a young kid again. One where the world didn’t want to hurt me.
Of course, at that thought, my eyes began to water and my sore throat clogged up.
I hate being sick,I thought, finally getting my feet to move to the table to take a seat. Although it wasn’t where I wanted to sit, I sat on a chair and folded my arms under my head on the table. The blanket was wrapped aroundmy arms, keeping my back warm against the air-conditioned room.
“More pain reliever,” Dawn sat down two more red pills and a cup of water. It took more effort than I had to lift my head to take them. Once I took the pills, I laid my head back down, blinking slowly at the room.
With how I was sitting, I was able to see Jasper off to the side. He shifted forward, but then sat back again.
Was I the one that made it all awkward?Most likely, my thoughts answered me.
There wasn’t much I could do to fix that issue right now, or ever.
“Is there anything you need?” He finally asked me. I think so anyways, since Dawn was busy warming food that I wasn’t exactly hungry for.
A hug?I thought, but I shook my head as another round of tears fell.
When was the last time I wanted a hug? To be touched? Sure, Dawn gave soft quick ones daily, but she never pushed for more than what I thought I could give. Before her, the only touch was when I cuddled with that boy, Asher, or when a man wanted something.
My chin wobbled.
I wanted to be held. Cared for. Loved, even.
None of that I could ever ask for. It wasn’t a need, and me being a baby wasn’t going to change anything at all.
I should have just stayed in my room, but I was lonely and my body hurt, and…...and…
“Did I do something wrong?” Jasper asked. That question must have gotten Dawn’s attention.
“I highly doubt it. He cries easily, and being sick probably just amps that up a bit.” She said it like it was normal and not an issue for her whatsoever. Which, really was true.
I hated crying, and being sick, and I just wanted something I couldn’t dare ask for. Least of all from another male.
“Food is warmed up, sweetie.” Dawn ran a hand down my back, giving me a tiny bit of the comfort I wanted as she sat a steaming bowl of soup in front of me.
Food was one of the last things I wanted right then, so I didn’t move from my position.
Dawn’s hand ran up and down my back a few times, which helped lessen the tears a little.
Her touch didn’t last nearly as long as I wanted. Dawn stepped back, another hint that I should eat before the soup got cold.
When I still didn’t move, Jasper spoke up. “You should eat. Just a few bites?”
I forced my head up, then pulled the bowl close enough to reach. Tentatively, I took a bite, letting the liquid soothe my throat.
After a few bites, hunger awoke in me like I hadn’t eaten in days. I was still careful with taking bites, knowing way too well what happened when I ate too fast.
Too engrossed in staring at the bowl, watching as the chicken and noodle soup slowly disappeared into my mouth, I jerked before quickly setting again as a hand reached out to move some of my wayward hair.
