When the touch returned to my head, petting me like I was a dog, my body relaxed back to the pile of blankets. I hummed and was tempted to reach out and hold to the arm that the hand was connected to. I wanted the touch to stay put, my other needs could be pushed down for a bit longer.
A small bout of panic hit when the touch left, but it was brief enough that I fell back to sleep for another few minutes. My heart was sluggish, my thoughts blank, as the aftereffects of the pills did what they were best known for.
The next time my brain turned on, the first thing that my entire attention was on was the fact that I freaking needed to pee. If I didn’t move soon, I’d be making a mess right where I lay. I didn’t think I had moved at all since the last time I took a drink.
With a groan, I pushed myself to kneel, and then to sit on my heels. The world spun, causing my stomach to roll with the motion.
Yeah, I had laid too long.
“Asher?”
Slowly, I lifted my gaze, meeting Beckett’s flat lips.
“What do you need?” He stepped closer, concern flashing along the part of his face I stared at. When I couldn’t get my words to work with me, he repeated the question.
“Gotta....go pee.” Although I was a bit scared to move. Maybe I could just ask for a cup to use where I was. Then I wouldn’t have to move and there would be little mess to clean up.
“Can you stand?” Beckett gentled his voice, kneeling in front of me for a moment to meet my eyes.
I think I nodded just slightly, but even then it caused the roller coaster inside of me to swirl to life. My arms wrapped around my stomach, hoping that’d be enough to detour anything that I didn’t want to escape to stay put.
“I...don’t feel good.” Tears gathered in my eyes as I confessed. At least that way, he’d get a bit of warning before I may or may not puke all over him.
“Nausea?” I blinked, afraid to do more than breathe. Laying down right there was starting to sound better and better. “Oh, no you don’t.” He caught me before I could do more than move an inch to do just that. I whined, tears falling from my eyes as he stopped me with a single hand on my arm. His hold was light enough that I could break out of it if I wanted to. “Stand. Come on.”
It took a second for my feet to find solid ground and my legs to hold my weight. Even then, I swayed, my knees threatening to break their hold. I had to swallow around the threatening bile that was rising forth.
“I’m going to carry you to the bathroom, alright?”
I wasn’t exactly in the position to argue. I knew some sort of liquid was going to come out of me one way or another, and trying to fight against the help to get me to the bathroom would only make the mess be here on the makeshift bed instead.
Beckett was gentle, hardly jousting me, as he picked me up. With one hand under my legs, closer to my butt, and the other wrapped around my back, I laid my head on his shoulder and breathed him in.
“Here ya go, darlin’,” Beckett said, placing my feet in front of the toilet. I kept my back pressed to his chest, trying to breathe him in. As long as I kept my thoughts on him, and focused on what he wanted, maybe the swirling within would disappear.
When he took a step back, most likely to give me space, my body leaned with him, keeping his front against me.
“You pee, and I’ll see if there are some anti-nausea meds in here, okay.”
Right. Of course. He couldn’t pee for me.
I flushed, forcing my body to pull away and lean more over the toilet. At least Beckett had lifted the seat for me. But still, my body wouldn’t work, and I just breathed.
“Remember your safe words. Always.”
Huh?
I didn’t get time to voice that one confused word before Beckett was behind me again, a hand pressing on my bladder and another aiming my dick down. It took only seconds for my body to release the liquid, splattering it into the white porcelain bowl. I was only slightly modified but mostly relieved as my bladder emptied.
Something had to be wrong with me, though. Because no sane person would ever allow another human to help them use the bathroom.
“That’s a good boy,” Beckett whispered, pressing just a tiny bit more on my bladder, making sure that I was finished. At the words, I nearly melted.
Crap.
I wanted to be his good boy. Which wasn’t what I should be thinking about.
At a loss for words, even if I could speak without making a fool of myself, Beckett moved me from the toilet to in front of the sink. There, he washed both of our hands together, letting the soap and water wash away the germs. If only something so simple could wash away all my fears, doubts, and desires.
