“I’m thinking I may put you on some anti-depressants in the next week or so,” he said. When he saw fear cross my face, he backtracked. “It’s to help you be able to sort through your emotions. It’s not because we want you to be drugged. We want to help.”
“No.” My voice wouldn’t work for more than that one word, and even that was pushing it as my lungs refused to cooperate with me.
“If you try to kill yourself again, I will,” Collin said, leaning forward. “Got it?”
“Yes, sir,” I whispered, looking away.
“So, tell me about yourself.”
“Why? You know everything already.”
“No. I only know of your health. I want to know who you are as a person.”
“I’m nobody,” I said with a blink.
“Scarlett,” Collin sighed. “This won’t work if you don’t talk about it.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. I want to die. I was raped, abused, and taken advantage of for years. My family knew where I was and did shit about it. I am no one. The one person who knew exactly where I was, and who I am, died and took that secret to the grave with her. Caesar,my father, threatened to send me back…and sometimes I wish you would so Alan can finish me off once and for all.”
“I’m glad you’re angry about what you’ve been through,” Collin said, not at all upset that I’d raised my voice at him as the words spilled out. “Anger shows that you’ve accepted that you aren't happy. It’s better than keeping it all in. You’ve done that for long enough.”
“Alan will haunt me for the rest of my life. He’ll find me one day and take me again and again before ending my life, just like he did Lisa’s.”
“Lisa?”
“I saw it. I saw him push her down the stairs, then twist her neck. And the blood…” I leaned over and gagged as the rush of memories came unbidden to me. I could still hear the cracking of bone. I could smell the coppery blood that seeped from her leg from where Alan had stabbed her—the same knife she was going to kill him with after she’d walked in on him raping me one morning.
“It’s okay. Let it out, girl.” He rubbed a hand up and down my back. I kept gagging until everything I had in me finally came out, splattering against the patio. “He won’t ever lay another hand on you again. I’d die before I let him. We all will. I promise, he’ll be handled before you can go about your life.”
“What life?” I panted, wiping my mouth on my arm. “No one here will let me do anything how I want.”
“Not until you don’t want to kill yourself. But they would, if that’s what you wish to do. You have the entire world at your fingertips and can go wherever you want. Ace will just want to know where you are, but he’ll let you go.”
“And the rest of you?”
“Peyton would be hard to shake at first, but he’d understand. Your parents wouldn’t be happy, but they’d let you. Caesar knows you will never see him as a parent, and he’s already mentally letting you go. He knows he messed up by not stepping in when the news first found its way to us about your wellbeing.”
“What about you?”
“You won’t be able to lose me easily, kiddo,” he said, looking at me like I was something more than a nobody.
“Today is the first day you’ve actually talked, you know. Other than a word here and there,” Collin said.
“Hmmm,” I said, leaning my head back on the chair and letting my eyes close. I was suddenly really frickin tired.
“Come one. Let’s get you back inside so you can take a nap,” he said, standing and walking back over to me.
I’d rather have stayed right here, but he didn’t give me the option. He held out his hand to help and, after a moment of hesitation, I took it. When I was standing, I wrapped my arms around my torso and walked beside him.
“You’ll figure things out,” he mused. “You aren’t the only one that has to adjust to change. We’re all in this together.”
Islept like the dead for a little over two hours. I hadn’t known I was that tired, but I guess the many sleepless nights finally caught up to me. The only reason I was waking up now was because Peyton was shaking me awake. When I pulled my eyes open, his expression wasn’t the one of calmness. It was filled with panic.
“Come on. Now. Hurry.” His words were whispered as he lifted the blankets off me and got me out of bed.
My mind was still sleeping as he ushered me across the hallway. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes as he opened the door, letting it fling against the wall. Dominic jumped up, holding a gun in his hand before instantly dropping it to his side. My heart stumbled in my chest.
“What the hell?”
