Sometimes, I wonder if there’s another person who can truly fit into this life with us. They don’t need to be for both of us, but that doesn’t mean my career won’t impact them, too.
CHAPTER 3
ALKA LENNON
We’re not staying on the island of nude beaches, but since this is an adult resort, they don’t get too strict about whether you’re wearing clothes—not that I’m walking around nude. I’m lying on a towel on the sand just outside our bungalow without clothes. It’s impossible to get rid of tan lines when it seems they’re permanently etched onto your skin.
I have one about mid-thigh and another at the edges of my shoulders. At the back of my neck. And low on my ankles. My ass is as white as the blinding sun. It’s awful. I’ve learned to wear a hat so there isn’t always a raccoon line around my eyes from my sunglasses. Small victories.
Unlike my husband, who’s fucking tanned from head to foot. I suppose when part of your workday is keeping your tan consistent for the camera, it’s a priority/necessity. And we live in sunny California, so it’s possible without a tanning bed.
Thinking of Oscar always makes me smile. Even though I know he’s only a few dozen feet away inside, taking a shower, and I’ll see him any minute now, I love the way just thinking about him brings a smile to my face.
That’s how you know you love someone. Just the thought of them makes your chest all warm, brings butterflies to yourstomach, and makes you grin like your relationship is brand new. No matter how long you’ve been together. We celebrated a decade together last month, but I still fall in love with him like we just met over and over again.
I know how lucky I am. How many people canhonestlysay that about the person they’ve been with for ten years? I’m not talking about just loving their spouse. I would hope everyone loves their life partners, and I mean living every day like you’re still experiencing new relationship energy.
Sometimes, it feels as though thinking about Oscar summons him. His shadow falls over me, and then he’s straddling me. I grin into my arm as his fingers begin to dig into my muscles. No one gives better massages than Oscar. He knows what to do with his hands.
I sigh, and it turns into a groan when he hits one of my muscles just right.
“Why are you always so tense?” Oscar asks. I can hear the smile on his face.
“So there’s always a reason for a massage,” I answer.
He chuckles.
“I don’t feel tense,” I say. “I think it’s just left over from school. Keeping those kids in shape when there aren’t games coming is a challenge.”
“You weed out those serious about going pro from those who simply want a scholarship.”
I nod. “Yep. Expertly said. It’s kind of exhausting though. Why am I putting in the effort when they’re not?”
“How about if you don’t?” Oscar counters. “If they lose their scholarship, that’s on them. Concentrate your effort on those who put the work in.”
I already kind of do that. This last year was particularly obnoxious. I had a damn good team for the season, but at least half of them started slacking off in January when we came back from break. It got so bad that in March I made a frustrated decision to tell them to get off my pitch if they weren’t going toput in the effort. I wasn’t going to waste my time on them, and their mere presence wasn’t going to be enough for me to recommend them back for the following season with another scholarship. I’m not rewarding laziness. Fuck that—and fuck them for wasting my time.
I left out that last part, but you best believe I thought that shit loudly. I’m confident it showed on my face.
“I did what I threatened. I did not recommend back at least a third of my team, which was as frightening as it was liberating. That means I’m going to have at least ten new kids on my team.”
“Good,” Oscar says, his magic hands moving down the sides of my spine. “You still let Harper scout for you, yeah?”
“Yep. She’s in charge of recruiting talent all year. I’d much rather focus on honing skills during the year than judging people’s talent. Not only do I not like it, but I’m shit at it. How do you know if they’re just having a good night or an off night? I’m crap at recognizing potentialandkeeping them straight from team to team. Besides, it takes up a lot of time.”
His shadow nods in understanding. When we first got together, there was a year that Oscar tagged along with me while doing high school visits. He was much better at keeping the guys straight as far as what I thought and felt about them between visits. Even with my notes, it felt like watching someone new every time.
Then my assistant coach Harper came along, and she was a game changer all around. Not just at scouting high school athletes but also as a coach. I daresay that she could totally run the team without me entirely. She’s just that good. Sometimes, I let her. I’m not at all thinking of retiring, but I’ve made it clear that when I’m ready to move on from Rainbow Dorset as their soccer coach, she’s got my endorsement. Loudly.
Sometimes, I think about doing something different. I love soccer. I miss playing, but I think I was built for coaching. It’s where I thrive, but sometimes I think that maybe I’m ready forsomething new. Especially after coming off the spring season I just had with half my team needing to be kicked in the ass.
“There are two months before you need to think about soccer again,” Oscar says.
“Mmm.” I hum in agreement as he continues to move further down my body and begins digging his fists into my glutes. Seriously, the way all my muscles turn to putty with his hands! I can’t get enough of this man’s massages. I’ve considered taking a few massage therapy lessons just so I can return the favor.
“What do you want to do this afternoon?” Oscar asks.
“Have we checked in with the guys yet? See when or if they’re coming this year?”
