The phone rings again. Ren declines as he takes my hand and leads me to his car.
My phone rings no less than a dozen times as we drive back to his house. Since this is the last game before break, I already have a bag in the trunk with clothes for the week. There’s no need to go back to my house. When he said I’d stay with him and his family for the holiday, he meant it.
When we step inside his house and the phone rings again, Ren answers it with irritation. I can hear my father’s voice and I cringe away.
I flinch when Ren talks over him. It’s not loud, he’s not shouting in the least. In fact, I’ve never heard him raise his voice at all. Yet, Iknowmy father stops talking as if Ren just steamrolled over him.
“I’m disappointed you can’t tell how much stress and pressure you place on your son,” Ren says. “Quite frankly, I’m disgusted by how much you seem to enjoy hurting him.”
My father responds, but I can’t quite make out the words. Meanwhile, I’m absolutely horrified by what Ren’s saying. Not because I disagree, but… because he’s actually saying it to my father. Out loud.
“He’s not going,” Ren responds as he drops his bag on the floor and proceeds to kick off his shoes. As if this is normal. Like he’s telling off a telemarketer.
He’s not hyperventilating like I am.
“Yes, he is,” my father shouts. “Who the fuck are you? What makes you think he’s not coming home?”
The fact I can hear his words clearly tells me just how loudly he’s yelling. Fuck, I can’t catch my breath. My eyesight dims, so all I see is Ren on my phone.
“Because I’m not letting him,” Ren answers calmly before hanging up.
He hangs up on my father! And then turns the phone off before handing it back to me. “You’re not turning this on until the 31st.”
I’m pretty sure my eyes are so fucking wide right now. Holy hell, Ren Ho just hung up on my father. I’m not sure whether to be on my knees in front of him, worshiping him, or sick to my stomach.
My father is probably furious.
Ren’s hand touches my cheek. “I promise, everything is going to be fine.”
“How do you know that?” I whisper.
“Because I will make sure it is, Fel.” He pulls me to him, and I have to bend over so he can bring my mouth to his. God, why hasn’t he always kissed me like this?! “I will always make sure everything is fine. No more worrying. Let me take care of it.”
I practically sink into him. A part of me is very conscious of the fact that I’m heavy. It comes with being as fucking tall as I am. But Ren doesn’t bend or fold under me. It’s as if I’m a doll. An infant. A feather pillow. He holds me tightly, steadily.
“I’ll take care of you,” he swears, pressing soft kisses to my face.
There’s a chance that maybe I could convince myself that Ren is too good for me and that I need to walk away. That chance was a very small blip in my life that happened before he showed up that day to check on me.
But today, there’s only one thing that’s happening between us. I’m falling for this man. Andnothingis going to make me stop falling for him.
TWENTY-THREE
REN
I could have gone homefor the break this year. With ten days off, there was time. I’m not entirely sure why we didn’t plan for that, but it definitely worked out in my favor. There’s no way I’m going to be leaving Felton on his own. Especially with the guys on the team he’s closest to going home for Christmas.
Instead, my parents and brother planned to come here since it’s rare that I get this much time off during this part of the year. We don’t celebrate Christmas like Westerners. My family isn’t Christian or religious in any sense of the word. As with the majority of China, we practice a combination of Buddhism and Taoism with a Confucian overview—which is widely known as the Chinese folk religion.
Thus, no Christmas.
When I brought up the holiday to Felton to gauge where he stood on it, I gathered that there wasn’t a lot of religious meaning behind the holiday for him. Which is rather fortunate because I could probably emulate some commercial and ‘lovely’ Christmas traditions—since we also celebrated that aspect to an extent back home when I was a child—but as far as the Christian aspect of the holiday… Not something in my wheelhouse.
Felton seems almost detached from the holiday entirely. I’m a little sad for him. Over my years in the NHL, I’ve witnessed that the vast majority of people are very excited about the holiday. Even if there isn’t a religious connotation to it. It means something to them. There are traditions and family and childhood memories.
Yet, thinking back, I’m not sure that Felton’s ever expressed any of those emotions. If he’s always had to go home to his parents, I’m not surprised he’s not excited. Likewise, if he’s chosen to stay home because there’s a game the day before or after, he’s been alone.
I’ve realized that maybe Felton’s been alone a lot. I’ve also realized over the last couple months that he doesn’t enjoy being alone.
