Toni nudged her hand, and Kaelee realized she was holding a tissue out. “Your eyes are leaking. You good?”
Kaelee huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, I’m excellent.” She swiped at her tears. “I did it, Professor D. I sold an actual novel that I wrote.”
“You did.” Toni paused. “I won’t say this often, but if you want a hug, I’ll hug you. I’m proud of you.”
Kaelee laughed louder. “I do want a hug, actually. You’re the best mentor I could have had through this, and I swear I won’t make a habit of hugging you.”
Although Toni was only three years older than Kaelee, it sometimes felt like they were years apart in age because Toni had her PhD already, had a bestselling book already, and had an amazing home and life. She had it all figured out. Hell, she was about to have awife. Kaelee, on the other hand, was renting a studio and not even sure she’d finish her PhD.
Toni stood.
“Special occasions only. I have a reputation as being unapproachable.” Toni opened her arms, and Kaelee stepped forward as Toni added, “I suppose this means you should start calling me by my actual name if I’ve hugged you.”
After a moment, they separated, and Kaelee teased, “I’d still rather hug your future wife, Toni.”
Toni flipped her off. “She’s excellent at hugging, but maybe you ought to find a woman of your own. You can afford to date one now.”
Kaelee shuddered exaggeratedly. “I might’ve followed you in terms of agent and editor, but I’m not going to go falling in love or getting married. Hard pass. I don’t think I’m built for commitment, and I can’t imagine there’s a woman out there willing to tolerate my bad habits.”
“Probably wise,” Toni agreed in a dry voice. “You conquer publishing. I’ll teach and write to fill my time when Addie is busy filming.”
Kaelee didn’t argue. For the first time, she truly understood the tremulous fear that Toni had voiced over her own next book. On one hand, this was it: the dream career was really happening. But what would happen if the next book did not sell or flopped? Finishing one book felt like a once-in-a-lifetime achievement. The sheer will it took to consider doing it over and over felt like a direct road to madness. All books got bad reviews. Most got nothing more than middling ones. And she’d already learned from Toni that sometimes it took the “yes” or “no” of one person to change your whole path. An influential reviewer or book buyer could make or break you. It was all terrifying.
One book at a time.That’s all any writer could reasonably do. And right now, they had both achieved it.I just sold two books.
Adding dating into that mix of emotions? Nope. That was not happening. Kaelee could do a lot of things and do them well, but handing so much power over her life to anyone was not on that list. And being a writer included being intentionally powerless. Often. Repeatedly. She could not fathom adding the emotional upheaval of dating to that already intense roller coaster.
“I am so grateful to know you,” Kaelee told her mentor.
“Back at you.” Toni gestured at Kaelee’s mostly untouched food.“Now, eat your damn lunch. The nerves ought to be a little settled. Eat your celebratory sandwich.”
Kaelee laughed. She’d rather have a drink, and maybe she could call a friend for that later. Lunch with her one and only writer friend was a pretty good start to celebrating.
Six months laterSTART OF SEPTEMBER
1Greta
On the train down to DC to meet up with Toni, Greta fired off an email to herotherlocal author. She hadn’t yet met Ms. Carpenter, and as much as Greta felt overdue for a day or two off work, she felt guilt pressuring her to reach out. Establishing a bond with her authors was part ofkeepingthem, but this particular writer made Toni look positively social—which was a sentence Greta couldn’t quite believe considering the fact that she was spending her afternoon on the Acela just to get Toni to discuss her publishing future. Being more reclusive than Toni had seemed impossible, but Kaelee Carpenter was managing to do just that.
Kaelee,
I will be in town briefly. Would you like to meet up? If I can, I want to catch the Etched by Light: Photogravures, 1840–1940 exhibit. We could chat there or grab lunch.
Your galley pages ought to be hitting the desk soon. The schedule will give you a few days to go overRevel of Stars and Fireone more time. Emily also has you on my calendar for a meet and greet with the team, but I am likely to be in town tomorrow so what do you think?
Greta
The reply from Kaelee was a short, terse note.
Ms. Clayborne,
I will check my calendar. However, I am not likely to be free last minute. If that changes in the near future, I will notify you. Thank you.
K. Carpenter
As Greta skimmed the quick, dismissive reply, she sighed. Honestly, she seemed to be collecting brusque authors, first Darbyshire and now this one. Kaelee made Toni Darbyshire seem positively gregarious. The more resistant to connection her authors were, the more Greta felt the urge to add emojis and exclamation points.
Kaelee,
