I wanted to reach out to him. Take hold of his shirt, pull him to me, close the distance. There was hardly any air separating us, and then he closed the distance even more, bracing his hands on either side of my head. I was pinned in place.
My heart was thumping loudly, demanding his touch.
He watched me, his eyes so dark again. He spoke, his tone hollow, “I met a little girl when she was eight years old, and suddenly I understood the world. You gave me the world. You gave me everything. I use the parameters thatyougave me. Don’t you remember, Blake? No one good. No one innocent. Everyone else, fair game. You said those words to me. I’ve been living by those parameters for the last fourteen years.” His head dipped down to my neck. I shivered, feeling his lips grazing over my skin. He was touching me. He was fanning the flames, but he wasn’t doing anything to extinguish the fire. He was here. He was in my space, but he was masking everything else. I didn’t like being able to read him. I couldn’t see his face, so I slid a hand up his neck. He went rigid at my touch. My fingers went up to the back of his head and took a fistful of his hair. I wanted to yank his head back, but he closed all the distance between us. His entire body plastered against mine, and he trailed his hand down my sides, to my legs, and he hoisted one up so it wound around his waist.
I moaned, closing my eyes. My fingers slacked on his hair.
He ground into me.
Pleasure coursed through me. That felt so good. He felt so good.
My hand began trembling. I was losing the fight in me.
I wanted to feel his skin. I wanted to feel him inside of me, moving, sliding in and out—
Then he said, quietly, still against my neck. “You ran from me, and I stayed away. I have stayed away—”
Cold reality hit me, dampening my desire. I remembered why I ran. “I ran because of you. I left because of who you are and what you did to the last guy who tried to date me.”
Goddammit. I needed to see his face, and I tightened my hold on his hair again. I tried tugging his head back, but he wouldn’t move. He trailed his other hand down my back, from my shoulder, down my side, and wound around my waist.
I gritted my teeth. This was so typical of him.
With Creighton, he would always push for power. He’d always try to unbalance the balance because that’s who he was.
Right?
Or was I wrong?
I looked away because my head was starting to hurt and I was getting confused all over again.
Maybe I was sobering up.
I needed to be away from him, as far as possible. I was tired of playing these games with him, and I shoved him back. He went, easily. My chest seized at that, too, because he wouldn’t give me anything I wanted tonight, but he would give me space?
Fuck him.
Keeping my head down, I wouldn’t make eye contact, and I went to the door.
“He didn’t ghost you, Blake.”
My chest seized. I stopped as I’d been about to reach for the door. “What?”
“The last guy you tried dating.”
A bitter laugh slipped from me because really? “What? Was he another one looking to hurt me? Gangbang with his buddies to get back at you? Because how many times can those sorts of things happen to the same girl before it starts to look like you’re searching for an excuse to kill them? You say I can date, but that’s not the truth. You don’t want me to be with anyone else. You won’t let yourself be with me tonight. I’m tired of this back-and-forth, Creighton. I’m tired of it. Let me go or ...” There was no point in finishing that because he wouldn’t. I whispered, feeling something in me breaking off, falling into a void, “You won’t let me go.”
“No.” He snarled, advancing on me.
I held up a hand, more out of instinct, and I half turned away.
He braked, drawing up short, but his words were harsh. He bit out, “I won’t let you go. Not anymore. That ship sailed. You want me, so now I’m yours and you’re mine.”
“Just not tonight.” I lifted my gaze and winced.
He was staring at me, hard. His jaw clenched. “No, not when there’s a risk your mind is altered. But make no mistake, Blake. I wouldn’t let some guy take you out on a date after railing three different girls that day. I didn’t let it happen back then, and there’sno wayI’ll let it happen now. The guy you were supposed to go on a date with wasn’t planning on hurting you because of me, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t have hurt you in other ways. He was just a typical sleazeball that wasn’t good enough for you. That’s where he messed up because you’renotthe fourth girl he’s going to fuck in a day. Not you.”
His words seared me. That’s what happened? I choked out, “Are you serious?”
