"Can I pick the colors at least?" The request comes out coated in uncertainty, testing the boundaries to see where they actually are.
Kade nods immediately, no hesitation in his response. "Of course. Whatever you want."
Relief floods through me at having some small measure of control. "I don't like the bright ones. No pinks and yellows, please." I trail off, trying to organize my thoughts and actually articulate preferences I've kept buried for years. However, I don’t want to overstep so I just stay quiet.
Kade’s smile widens a bit more. “Anything else, Solana?”
“No.” I say it a little too quickly, Kade raising an eyebrow in silent question. “Um, okay, I like your scents. I think I would want them in there.” The only way that would happen is if they both step into my nest or I steal enough of their clothing to keep their scent beside me. Either option feels like asking for a mountain.
Kade leans over and presses a kiss to the side of my head, lingering there for a long moment. “Such a good girl for telling us what you want, aren’t you, Solana?”
My face heats as his hand falls to my hip and squeezes a little, a gasp pulling from my lips. I had no idea I liked Kade’s words that much but one look up at the Alpha and I realize he already clocked what I liked before I did.
Chapter fifteen
Dustin
I definitely overdid it at the clothing store, but I was able to fill the trunk with wrap dresses in every color Solana would look good in and get back to the nesting store before they were finished browsing. She wouldn't be the wiser about just how many bags were currently stashed in the vehicle, which is exactly how I wanted it.
Watching Kade subtly test Solana's reactions had been fascinating, almost educational even in a way I hadn't expected. Every time he walked past a pillow or blanket with a particular color or texture, he'd glance at Solana's face or take a deeper breath to read the shifts in her scent. It was like watching a master at work, this silent game between them where Kade would pick something up and either put it in the basket or make a mental note for later based on the tiny shifts in her expression or the way her scent would sweeten just slightly. Sometimes it was so subtle I almost missed it, but Kade never did.
The whole experience reminded me why Kade is so good at what he does in business and in life. He reads people the way most people read books, catching details that would slip past anyone else without a second thought. With Solana specifically, he was collecting data on what made her feel safe and comfortable without overwhelming her with direct questions she might not know how to answer after years of being told her preferences didn't matter. Smart bastard knew she'd been conditioned to second-guess every single preference she had, so he found a way around it by making it about observation rather than interrogation.
He'd pick up a deep blue pillow and glance at her face. Her eyes would light up just slightly and he'd add it to the basket. Then he'd try a bright yellow one and her nose would wrinkle just barely. That one went back on the shelf. Green got a smile. Pink made her tense. Gray made her sigh with what sounded like relief.
Now we're back at home bringing everything inside and Solana seems completely lost in the small bedroom we gave her this morning. She's standing in the middle of the space, staring at the bags piled on the bed and then at us and then back at the bags like she's trying to solve a complex problem we’re not privy to. Her hands twist in the fabric of her dress, a nervous gesture I'm already learning means she's spiraling internally and trying to figure out the right answer to a question no one actually asked.
Part of me wants to jump in and ask if she needs help because she mentioned not even having a nest before, never being allowed to build one at Harmony House. The thought makes me want to drive back to that place and burn it to the ground. But Kade has a firm hand on my back, keeping me from saying anything. His fingers press just hard enough to communicate that I need to wait and let this play out without interference.
Taking a breath, I force myself to be patient and actually observe instead of react. I decide to tune in a little better instead of running my mouth like I usually do, actually paying attention to what's happening in front of me instead of what I think should happen based on my own excitement.
That's when I realize something I didn't catch before in my enthusiasm to get her settled and comfortable. It's not just that she's overwhelmed by the shopping bags and supplies piled on the bed. She's scared. Actually terrified based on the way her scent has gone acidic, cutting through the vanilla and orchid with something that smells like pure panic.
From what little she's mentioned about Harmony House and the feel of that place when we picked her up yesterday, there's no doubt in my mind that Solana probably thinks the wrong move will get her punished or yelled at the same way it did when they caught us at the horse race. One kiss and she spent the night in isolation without food or water.
What does she think will happen if she makes a mistake with the nest, if she puts something in the wrong place or uses the pillows incorrectly or shows too much enthusiasm for something she's supposed to be grateful for rather than excited about?
The thought makes my chest ache. She's standing in a room full of things we bought specifically for her comfort and happiness, and she's terrified of doing it wrong. There is no wrong way to build a nest. It's supposed to be instinctive and personal and whatever feels right to the Omega creating it. But Harmony House has stolen that from her, along with so many other things.
Taking another deep breath, I force myself to stay quiet and still as Kade steps forward into the room. Solana looks up at him, the fear in her eyes making my chest hurt so badly I have to resist the urge to pull her into my arms and promise her that nothing bad will ever happen to her again.
She looks so small standing there, despite not being far from our age at all. Thirty-one years old and she's looking at Kade like she's a child waiting for punishment from a parent, like she's already bracing for the impact of whatever correction is coming.
"I need your words, sunshine." A purr attaches to the end of his words, a small smile playing on his lips. "I can't help you if I don't know what you need."
Solana looks up at him, her bottom lip trembling slightly. "It doesn't smell right in here and I don't want to be alone. But I don't know what to ask for... what I'm allowed to ask for."
I swallow back a snarl. She shouldn't have to ask permission for basic comfort. She shouldn't have to wonder what she's allowed to want or need. But here we are, unpacking years of conditioning one conversation at a time.
Kade steps a little closer. "You're allowed to ask for anything. Try again." The gentle command in his voice is coated with his Alpha bark but not in a demanding way. He’s used the same tone on me when I get too bogged down by my own emotions and it’s always been a comfort rather than making me feel trapped.
Solana visibly relaxes before clearing her throat, her hands still twisting in her dress hard enough that I worry she'll tear the fabric. "I don't want to be here."
"Good girl." Kade's voice carries approval and warmth, the praise clear in his tone.
Her scent blooms immediately at those two words, sweetening in a way that fills the whole room and makes my Alpha instincts sing with satisfaction. She smiles just a little, a tiny upturn of her lips that transforms her whole face from frightened to almost hopeful. In that moment, I realize that Kade already cracked the code and figured out what makes Solana tick beneath all the fear and conditioning.
Solana likes praise. No, she craves it. Why wouldn't she after so many years of being stuck in Harmony House, where everything she did was wrong, where every natural instinct was punished and corrected and shamed? They spent years telling her she was broken and wrong and too much trouble. Of course, she responds to being told she did something good, that she made the right choice, that she's exactly what we want.
