He cleared his throat, urging the horse forward, and began the trek home. “What do you want to do? What is your plan?” That was the exact question he’d posed to himself since they’d left London. How could he extricate her from this situation? How could he help her? He’d planned to court her, but another option presented itself; one that seemed too outlandish even to voice.
She fingered the handle of her bag. “I must gain this position. It is all I have left.”
“It is not all.”
She smiled up at him, her expression innocent to the thoughts raging in his mind. “Yes, I apologize. Your help has been astronomical, but I will not continue to rely on you. I cannot—you have your own life.”
How to say it? How to pose his thoughts in a way that would not lead her to believe him ridiculous?
There was nothing for it. She was going to think it regardless; he might as well get it over with.
“I think you should marry, Sophie,” he said in an undertone, watching her response as their bodies swayed together with the horse’s movement.
Indignation flared in the set of her brow, and she lifted her chin and narrowed her eyes up at him. He was distracted by the moisture still clinging to her lashes. “Do not tell me you are of the same mind as my parents? I need no husband; I have a career. Just because I’ve had this slight hiccup in my plans does not mean I should abandon them entirely. I am very good at—”
“Ithink,” he said, in just as low a tone, but with more emphasis. He needed her to understand what he was offering. “I think you should marryme, Sophie.”
She froze, her mouth parting as she gaped at him.
Inches from her, he watched steadily back, his hands strangling the reins as he hoped she could not read him as well as he read her. Hoped all she saw was confidence and certainty… not the way his heart pounded and his stomach twisted. He’d once dreamt of proposing marriage to Sophie Renard, the beautiful, brilliant, witty woman who lived down the lane.
But not like this. He tore his eyes away, but he could not pull his body from her as easily. Her heat radiated onto him, and every time he breathed, his chest hit her arm. The smell of roses mixed with the crisp trees around them. It might have just become simultaneously his favorite and least favorite scent.
“I cannot tell if this is a jest, Andrew.”
That boded well for his suit. “Listen,” he said, glancing down at her. She sat rigidly, whether with wariness or shock, he could not rightly say. He attempted to give her the space she must desire—though for far different reasons than he wished for it—moving his arms so that despite being around her, they did no more than brush against her back as the horse plodded forward. “You need a husband—not,” he added, because she had opened her mouth, “because you are incapable on your own, but because you need the protection of a man’s name to gain your position. You need a place to stay. You deserve to not have to fend for yourself in London. Let me be that man.” He tensed as his arm grazed her back, and his breath moved the hair around her forehead. “Marry me.”
She blinked several times, as if ensuring the moment was real. “I cannot do that. I cannot force you into a union you do not desire. What of your future?”
He shook his head. “I always planned to marry when things were more solidified. If you do not mind marrying a man rather unsettled in his career and life, I am at your service.” He could not declare the torch he’d always held for her—not now, when he knew her feelings did not hint toward romance. But why did he not mention the wager? She should know she was helping him as well. Yet he could see how wary she was already, and did not want to pressure her into it by thinking she needed to help him; her sense of justice was strong, and she would already see herself in his debt after the last few days.
Besides, he wasn’t doing this for the bet. He was doing this because he had to help Sophie—wanted to help her. And because he’d been handed a second chance with the woman he’d once loved… might still love.
“But everyone will know… if I marry you now, everyone will know I cannot have been married before. Word will get to Mr. Whitcomb.”
Andrew shook his head. “We will marry by bishop’s license. I can obtain one in the morning. Then the banns need not be posted.”
She nodded. “We will have to wait a week and be married here, in our church.”
Yes. That was true. “We will have to return in a week’s time.”
“And until then?”
Andrew drew in a breath; it was cold in his lungs, despite the heat from Sophie’s proximity. His mind puzzled over the options, but there was nothing for it. He could see only one way forward. “Sophie, I hold your reputation in the highest regard; you must know that.”
Her eyes narrowed in confusion. “Certainly, I do.”
“Then I hope you will forgive the audacity of my recommendation. I suggest we act as if we are married until we are able to make it official.”
Her hands tightened on her bag, her eyes jolting to his, then dropping to his cravat. “Act?”
“I know how you hate the lie your parents have created, and I do not wish to heap another to the pile, but I see no way around it. My family does not have the connections for a special license, we do not have the time for a trip to Gretna Green, and if we return to London, living in separate locations until the official marriage, it may make it back to your employer.”
She was nodding, but of a sudden, she stilled. “I see the sense in what you are saying, but… Andrew, I am no wanton woman, however unusual my job choices might be.”
Like a dousing of water, her concerns became apparent. She was not reticent to marry him. She was reticent about what he meant byact married.His neck grew hot at the implication. “Gads, Sophie, you cannot think I would… that I…” He took a steadying breath, that was quite frankly, useless, then forced out words he did not wish to say but had to for her sake. “This marriage could be whatever you wish. One in name only, if you desire it. But until we are married, I would never… I could never…”
Her hand landed atop his arm, and he became quite fixated on it, on the warmth spreading there.
