“It’s probably not. I wouldn’t laugh at your dreams and desires anyway,” I promised.
She blinked at my words, absorbing them, weighing my intent. Then she smiled. “Okay, fine. I’ll tell you, but you can’t tell a soul.”
“Cross my heart.”
She held her breath for half a minute before blurting it out, “I have enough songs written to record two albums. I want to maybe start singing some of my songs on stage—pub stages. In Halifax, not Lunenburg, so I can do it when I’m at school and not have Dad freak out. I need to see if I have what it takes to…” she trailed off, glancing at the bass guitar in the corner of my room. “Make it.”
“You do. Have what it takes, I mean,” I told her. My words pulled her emerald eyes back to me, but she looked like she didn’t believe it. This girl was a shining star, she just couldn’t see it yet. “We’ve used how many of your suggestions for our stuff?” I reminded her.
Her eyes brightened, like it was the first time she’d heard anybody say that to her. It shouldn’t have been, but it wouldn’t have surprised me if Michael tried to stifle that dream of hers to keep her close.
“All of them,” she laughed. The sound of it made me grin. Then the laughter faded, and she frowned, as if she regretted admitting it to me.
“There you have it then.”
“I don’t know if I’m cut out for it.” Connor shrugged, pausing to tug at a thread on my blanket. “The performing bit, anyway. It seems intimidating to sing up on stage, with so many people watching. I had a hard enough time with piano recitals when I was little. All those people watching…and that’s okay, maybe my calling really is songwriting and music therapy. I’d be happy with that, but…I want to try before I give up on that dream.”
Fuck it though, if it was what she wanted, I wanted to see her get there—Michael Jacobs be damned. If he couldn’t pull his head out of his ass and see how talented both his kids were, and how desperately the world needed both Calum’s dark and Connor’s light, well, that was his loss.
“I think you’d make a great music therapist, Connor. You are kind and empathetic…you’ve got one of the biggest hearts. But I think you’d do well as a professional musician too. Don’t sell yourself short.”
“I don’t plan on it.” Her eyes locked on mine, trapping me. She was determined; I could tell by the fiery look in her eyes. Her eyes were a shade of everglade green, with an orangish brown ring around the pupil. The orange became more apparent when she was fired up—and Connor was charged.
When she spoke about her dreams like this, there was a passion simmering from within her, making her glow from the inside out. I wanted to see that vision, her on stage, millions of fans in the audience ready to drink her songs up.
“You’re a wonderful songwriter, and the way you sing, Connor?” I shook my head, unable to come up with words adequate enough for her. “You have everything it takes and more. I can help you produce it, if you want.”
“Really?” she asked, flushed with embarrassment or excitement—or both.
“Yeah, really.” I grinned.
“I need to graduate first before I can focus on recording.”
“Understandable.” I nodded once again. School had always been important to Connor. She never half-assed a single thing she did. But I was vying for ways to spend time with her. “We could always work on it slowly and wait to say anything about it until you’ve graduated.”
I shouldn’t have been trying so hard to convince her to spend more time with me, but I wanted her to. I’d have happily gobbled up any excuse to hang out with her.
“I don’t see how that’s possible, with you touring and me busy with school.”
“Anything’s possible if you make it happen. We could work on some things remotely, over text or video call. Even if you’re not ready to start recording right now, we still have a lot of things we can work on.”
She looked at me for a moment, as if reading what was really on my mind. She leaned forward, her eyes sparkling.
“Is thatallwe’ll work on?” she asked coyly, her sweet lips just inches from mine. I could feel the whisper of her breath tickling my mouth and chin. She was already on to me. “Because…I can think of a fewothersecret desires of mine…desires I think you’d be good at fulfilling.”
“Is that so?” I asked, cocking a brow at her. She nodded, that devious smile dancing across her lips. I wanted to kiss the smirk off her face, so I did, kissing her slowly, deeply. I wanted to keep control, but it spiraled out of my grip with the sweep of her tongue against my lips.
She broke my restraint like it was made from the thinnest of glass. Shifting so she was on top of me, her knees on either side of my hips—her core pressed tight against mine. Connor moved her hips, rolling against my hard-on while she devoured my kiss. Holding her against me, I prayed the night would never end.
She didn’t seem ready for it to end either. As we kissed, my fingertips traced patterns against her thigh, creeping upward along her spine. I played with her back dimples, stroking her skin with the pads of my calloused fingers. Connor moaned against my mouth, pressing the sweetest parts of her body against me. Her soft fingers traced my shoulders and my collarbone, leaving fire in their wake. Her hands roamed my chest, her fingers playing a beat on my flesh as they travelled lower.
I was already aching to be inside her again, and her hands exploring my body weren’t helping. She loomed above me, looking down, her auburn hair spilling over her shoulders like a copper waterfall. “I want you, Dare,” she whispered, her eyes searching mine.
I brought my hand up to tangle in her hair, guiding her lips to mine to claim her mouth again. I kissed her deep, hoping she’d feel it for days on her lips like I knew I would.
* * *
Connor snuckout of my room at four in the morning. She thought she was being quiet, but she made enough noise looking for her clothes that it woke me up from the deepest and best sleep I’d ever had.
