“Ohmygodno,” I said, the words rushing out as one word as I truly felt the inability of such an action. “He’s everything to me.”
Andrew cleared his throat to bring me back. “Ethan, take few seconds and then open your eyes.”
In those seconds, I recognized for the first time ever that my past was just that. In the rearview mirror and out of sight. Maybe it took the caring and love of a man. After all, I’d never been in love before. Turns out that I’d been waiting for the man that would appreciate me absolutely for who I was despite the sins of my past. He loved me even though I was impossibly passionate about my job with Maserati and could talk about their different models way too much. I was obsessive for anything Italian… even from Northern Italy since that’s where Frank andpolentaoriginated from. He loved me. And in return, I loved him with a fierceness that I never knew conceivable.
When I opened my eyes, my mouth uplifted into an easy smile. “Seven years of hard work learning to forgive myself. But it took a man in a confessional that stole my heart and gave me a future to look forward to.” Meeting Andrew’s gaze, I said, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Ethan. Sometimes, all it takes is analyzing something from a different angle.”
We spoke for a while longer. When Andrew signaled that our time was up, I did something that was out of character for me and probably was one of the “don’ts” in the therapist’s handbook. He never rose when I left. So, I leaned over and hugged him. “Thanks to you, Andrew, I’ve reclaimed another pound of freedom.” I spun around and left right away.Otherwise, he or I or both might’ve gotten emotional. But I’d meant every word.
From Andrew’s office I stopped at The Ring and to say a quick hello. I parked blocking the garage attached to the building but I knew I’d only be a few minutes, and I didn’t want to park by the church. Hawk embraced me with a wide grin and holding me at arm’s length, repeatedly told me how great I looked. When he asked when I was coming back to work out, I told him soon. As soon as Jude’s affairs with the Church were settled. Before I left, I said, “Just an FYI, Hawk, if anyone come around asking…”
Hawk held up his hand to stop me. “I told Jude the same I’m telling you. If anyone comes sniffing around, no one’s getting any information. Oliver knows as well for when I might not be here.” He studied me but then he smirked. “Love looks good on you. I’m happy for you, man.”
“Thanks, Hawk.”
He gave my arm a playful punch, then said in a mocking tone. “Now move your fucking truck from clogging my driveway and get home to your man.”
“Yes, sir,” I said and left with him laughing. Once inside my truck, I sent a text to Jude that I was on my way, started the engine, and headed home.
By the time I walked into my apartment I was shattered, the therapy session having used up my reservoir of energy. When I went into my bedroom hoping to flop on the bed with Jude, he wasn’t there. I had a flash of worry until he called out, “I’m in here.”
I kicked off my work boots and crossed the hallway to the guest bedroom with the en suite bathroom that had a bathtub with jets. Jude was already in the water. A moment passed before he noticed me standing on the threshold. Not enough time for me to get my fill. His sandy blond hair was slicked back,apparently having dunked his head. Droplets of water danced on the ends of his eyelashes that framed rich brown eyes studded with gold specks; they appeared to have been sun kissed. Unlike me, he had virgin skin, pale from having worn his clerical clothes up until only a week ago.
“Hey, baby,” Jude said. “I just got in. Come join me while the water is hot. I timed your arrival from your text.”
“I hadn’t thought of taking a bath but it’s exactly what I need,” I breathed out on a sigh and began stripping myself as fast as my fingers allowed me. “And you look incredibly sexy all wet.”
I stripped my clothes off in record time. I put a leg in and was going to sit behind him, but Jude said, “No, baby. You worked all day. Lower yourself in front of me because with your permission, I’m going to simultaneously massage and wash you, make you come, and then get out and towel you off. And then I’m going to feed you the dinner that I put aside. All you have to do is take what I give you.”
My head swam with his words on the tail of Andrew’s experiment with me. “Fuck,Babbo.Where is this coming from?”
“I might’ve fallen down a rabbit hole while researching D/s dynamics. Not that I’d ever consider myself even close to being a Dom. The only thing that resonated with me was a few ideas that I could really see us doing together.” Jude waited a beat and then asked, “Do I have your permission.”
My mouth was dry. “Yes,” I replied, my voice husky.
Jude shifted behind me. “Let your arms dangle at your sides.” He soaked the washcloth and opening it over his upturned hand, he squirted a generous amount of bodywash into the center before laying it on my upper back. Using both his hands, he lathered me by making slow circles, first on my clavicle and left shoulder. He took his time pressing deep enough that I felt the pressure through the washcloth. Judeencouraged me to let my head fall forward while he kneaded the tired muscles. “How does it feel, baby?”
“Ahhh…” I mumbled, dragging out the sound. I never had a massage before and never understood the appeal until I felt Jude’s hands.
He moved to the right shoulder, giving it the same few minutes of kneading. But then he dropped the washcloth in the bathwater and began working on the base of my head with his thumbs, following my hairline. I twisted my head from side to side a few times. “Does it feel good, baby?”
“Yes, so good.”
But when he rubbed hard over the bone that connected the top of my spine to my skull, I groaned loudly as if Jude was pleasuring me sexually. “Fuck… fuck…”
As he made his way down my spine, taking his time on each vertebrae, he left a trail of kisses. But then he opened his legs wide and pulled me back so close that his dick was smushed into the base of my spine. Lifting my chin, he gently pushed down on my shoulders, which lowered me so my head was on his chest. “Relax, baby, the best is yet to come. Let me take care of you.”
Relaxing wasn’t anywhere near the right description for this bath. Draping his arms over my shoulders and armed with a palmful of bath gel, Jude massaged my pecs. Slow, sensual rotations around my nipples, one hand on my left and the other on my right. His hands drifted higher, close to my armpits and as good as that felt, I wanted him back near my nipples. “Please,Babbo.”
“What baby?” he asked in a sing-song tone. “Ask me.”
“My nipples…”
My cock strained for attention and when my hand came out of the water to stimulate my hard length, he slapped it. “Nuh-uh.”
Finally, he kneaded the muscles around the areola and when I wriggled frantically, seeking friction, he twisted the nipple rings at the same time, stretching them up. “Baby, manipulating your nipples with the rings is suck a freaking turn on,” he said, hoarsely.
