“Ethan, come back and sit down. You’re not disturbing anything that can’t wait. Neither would you have come in here unless it was important.”
I gladly pivoted back to the armchair opposite Frank. I didn’t want to waste his time so spat out, “I met someone. A guy.”
Frank’s mouth split into a broad smile, making his dimples pop like quotation marks when he said, “That’s wonderful, Ethan. Give me details.”
Fuck, this part was tricky. How should I broach Jude’s situation? His leg started bouncing and he stilled it. “There are complications, Frank.”
“Knowing you, they can’t be as bad as you think,” Frank encouraged.
I breathed in, huffed it out, then said, “Jude… that’s his name. He left the priesthood against the bishop’s will. It’s not illegal or anything and the Church can’t come after him physically but…” I looked directly at Frank. “I care a lot about him. And he feels the same about me.”
Frank hummed to himself and combed his fingers through his wavy gray hair. “Are you telling me to get my approval, son?”
I immediately cast my gaze down, not having expected the question. But now that it was out there, Frank was right. It was the reason I’d chosen to talk to him first privately, without Mamma. He’d switched to addressing me as his son to remind me of my status as family, and I loved him for it. “To be honest, I hadn’t thought about it until you asked me. But yes, Frank, as the head of the family your approval would mean a lot to me.”
Frank leaned forward. “Then you have it. Now tell me more about your man.”
I filled Frank in with some of Jude’s history regarding how long he’d been with the Church. Then I explained about his situation with his parents, Father Matthew, and the bishop.“Frank, I want you to know that we didn’t even hold hands until he physically separated himself from the Church.”
“Son, I don’t need to know details. What you do romantically is not my business, but you never mentioned how you met. You said it’s been a couple of months so not holding hands would’ve required a lot of willpower.”
Frank wouldn’t be able to see on my dark skin, but I blushed hot at telling him. “Our first meeting and for several weeks afterward… well, we met in the confessional at his church.”
It’s lucky that Frank hadn’t been drinking anything when he choked on his own saliva. “Excuse me, do you mean an actual confessional where people confess their sins?”
I cocked my head at him. “Do you want the detailed version?”
“Hell, yeah,” Frank said.
“It all began when I started parking in front of the rectory…” I continued on until the present. I sat forward, my arms flat on his desk, and admitted in a very low voice. “I haven’t been with anyone in seven years Frank. The thought of being with another man scared the fuck out of me; that I’d get triggered. But our visits in the confessional where we couldn’t touch provided a safe place for us since he never cheated on his vows. Even now, we’re taking it slow. Bizarre, right? And yet, being with him feels so right.”
When Frank suddenly pushed to his feet, I jumped up. He came around the desk, using the flat surface to steady himself since he didn’t have his cane, and he hauled me into a bear hug that made my eyes water with relief. “I’m so happy for you, son. And Mamma will be equally overjoyed.” With his hands on my shoulders, he pushed me away to meet my gaze. “This is what we’ve both wanted for you. To see you with someone.”
“Just to make sure… you’re okay with the whole priest thing?” I asked tentatively, needing the extra verbal consent.
“Ethan, if he was as unhappy as you say and he’d tried for eight years in order not to disappoint his parents, first of all, it’s a damn pity that they’re not supporting him. He wanted to find what he was meant to do in life and that takes courage. And if part of his plan is making you happy, then Mamma and me will fill in, just like we did for you.”
“I love you, Frank,” I blurted out and embraced him this time.
“I know you do. So, you’ll come to Sunday dinner and we’ll make sure that Gabby and Belle are there. And we’ll call Teddy while you’re at the house so he can meet Jude, too.” Frank patted me on my back as he walked me to his office door. “When are you going to call Mamma?”
“Tonight,” I confirmed.
Frank studied me for a second, then said, “You look happy, Ethan.”
“I’m not getting ahead of myself,” I said cautiously, “but I am happy.”
The day flew by even though I had to shorten my call to Jude at lunchtime. I had a tricky service job, and I didn’t want to work overtime. In the past, I wouldn’t have cared but knowing that Jude was waiting for me made all the difference.
“Hey,” I said when I walked into my apartment. Jude was standing on the patio. When he turned around, he took my breath away. With the sun haloing his blond locks and his brown eyes looking more like liquid caramel than dark earth, it made me think back to the first time I laid eyes on him. He was an angel in that moment. And more of one now that I’d come to know him.
“Hi,” he said, almost shyly.
I put my keys and lunch carrier on the kitchen counter and walked toward him, slowly appreciating his toned arms under one of my T-shirts. “You look like you got some sun.”
Jude met me halfway and when we were only inches apart, he wrapped his arms around my neck, a gesture that was becoming very familiar, which brought our bodies together. “I took a long walk and then sat on the beach for a long time. Ethan, it was so peaceful, like the combination of water and sun, and the call of the gulls were mixed together to make a magic elixir. A thousand times better than vegetating in a hotel room with a window that looked out onto the parking lot.”
“Stay here with me,” I said, not even thinking before the invitation spilled out.
