“It wasn’t until he eventually fell in with those other two that he found something of himself again,” Talon went on. “He found purpose once more. And I never heard him speak a word of Esmerine again, like he’d finally found some way to put her behind him. I think it helped, leaving the rest of us behind in Riversend. Making a new life for himself. He’d visit, of course, and I could see that, deep down, he was still the friend I’d always known, but he was different, too. In more ways than one.” He reached up, his fingers absently touching the scar along his jaw.
“Those days were when he truly became the hero of song and legend,” he went on. “When his fame and his deeds spread to the very edges of Therador. When he earned the title of Lion Warrior.” He paused. “When he suddenly disappeared…I wondered if it had something to do with her. If he’d finally found something and followed it… He seemed so invincible in every other part of his life, but she was his weak spot. The one place he was vulnerable.” His eyes rose to one of his birds, which did a circle around our heads before coming to land on his shoulder once more. “But then I heard those other two had disappeared, as well. And when none of them returned, for years…”
I didn’t know how to respond to any of this. Didn’t understand exactly how all of this information fit together, or what that meant for Octavian, let alone me.
“Tell me honestly,” I said, because I couldn’t help myself—because I was selfish, and confused, and because the question eclipsed all other thoughts in my mind. “Do you believe he still loves her?”
There was sympathy in Talon’s eyes now, which had me bracing for his answer even before the words left his lips.
“If you’d asked me before, I would have said yes without question,” he told me. “But a lot can happen in ten years.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
The curl of his lips showed he was amused by my directness, but the look in his eyes was too close to pity. “I couldn’t tell you. I can just say again that it’s clear he cares about you. You’re the first woman I’ve seen him with since Esmerine disappeared—and while of course it’s possible he’s been with any number of women in the last decade, I have a feeling he wasn’t in a rush to enter another love affair. Just the fact that he’s traveling with you, that he’s brought you here…if you ask me, that means something. The way he looks at you means something. But I don’t presume to know my friend’s innermost thoughts, especially now.” He paused, then added, “Still, it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that he’s punishing himself for what happened to her, whether he realizes it or not.”
I wasn’t sure how to respond to that.
I thanked him again, then retreated to my room, too overwhelmed to interrogate him any longer. I’d learned more about Octavian’s past in these last five minutes with Talon than I had in all the time I’d spent with Octavian. But for some reason, finally having answers didn’t make me feel any better.
And that was even ignoring the fact that I was still kind of pissed about everything that had happened in the bath—still peeved at Octavian for treating me like I couldn’t make my own decisions about my body, and angry with myself for feeling anything and possibly justifying his concerns.
Not to mention that you let yourself get so distracted by all this nonsense that Octavian never even finished telling you where his powers come from.
I dropped my towel and flopped down on the bed, too exhausted to make sense of anything or even try to manage my feelings.
I wish Esmer and Isaac were here.They always made everything easier. Isaac would probably draw upon his extensive knowledge to solve all the mysteries of Therador, and Esmer would tell me to stop being so dramatic and give me the tough-love pep talk I needed to get my head on straight. She’d almost certainly get a kick out of the fact that Octavian’s ex-lover was named Esmerine—but that wouldn’t distract her from giving me tips about how to break down his walls and seduce him. At the end of the day, her priority would always be getting me laid.
I laughed to myself, and it was only then I noticed the tears on my cheeks.
Pull yourself together, Goldie.I swiped the tears away, then pressed my face into the pillow.Thiswas why I’d avoided dating for so long—I was terrible at it. I got all worked upwaytoo easily. Apparently I could face down Tendrils and basilisks and Laitha and be just fine, but the minute I startedfeeling things, I dissolved into a sappy mess.
In my head, I heard Esmer’s voice say,If you’re going to cry over a guy, at least make sure you’re getting something good out of the deal. Like toe-curling sex.
I half-snorted and half-sobbed into my pillow, and when sleep finally overtook me, I didn’t fight it.
I woke to the door bursting open.
“Goldie!”
I jerked upright, terrified. My mind took in my surroundings—stone walls, rumpled bed, and the small, perky girl in the doorway—and it took me a moment to remember where I was and how I’d gotten there.
“Aw, I was kind of hoping I’d find the two of you in here together,” Ary said as she bounded into the room, her arms full of fabric. Her eyes ran down my body. “Or did I just miss him?”
Oh, right. I’m completely naked.I quickly snatched my discarded towel up from the floor and wrapped it around my body. “If you’re talking about Octavian, he was never here.”
“Really?” She looked disappointed. “Well, don’t worry—he won’t be able to resist you when he sees you in this.” She held up the bundle of fabric in her arms, which turned out to be a dress.
And it was a gorgeous dress, too—the skirt had multiple layers, each one in a different shade of blue. The bodice appeared to be navy, but it was hard to tell because it was covered in thick, detailed embroidery—flowers and vines done in dozens of colors of thread and ribbon, even strung with beads in several places.
“Do you like it?” Ary asked. “It’s Fiona’s, but I convinced her to trade for it. I would’ve given you one of mine but they’re all too small for you.”
For the first time since she’d entered my room, I realized that she, too, had foregone the pants and shirt she’d been wearing before for a flowing dress of yellow, complete with swirling, spring-green embroidery across the bodice and down the long sleeves. She even had gold ribbons braided through her dark hair.
“What’s it for?” I asked.
“What do you mean? The Hill Festival, of course.” She gestured for me to get up. “Come on, I want to make sure it fits you.”
I climbed off the bed, careful to keep the towel wrapped around me. “I thought that wasn’t until tonight.”
