“Nothing.” He shakes his head.
“You’re lying. It’s something. Spit it out.”
He remains quiet but he peers at the bottle once more.
“Are you calling me an alcoholic?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest.
“We both know you’d be dead from alcohol poisoning if you weren’t a founder.”
I huff. “If I wasn’t a founder, I’d have died long before I started drinking,” I say, looking out the window as he drives down the highway. The drugs that Dollhouse pumped into my system alone would have done me in. A person can only take so much before theirbody gives out.
The enhancements help our immune systems. It’s a way for those at the top to live longer. You’ll never see a powerful Lord with cancer or any type of untreatable disease.
But it also backfired on them. They say that’s how the confessional and offerings started. The ones they wanted out would live for too long, so the Lords came up with a way of getting rid of a founder whose time wasn’t up yet.
It’s supposed to keep them accountable.
It’s rigged. If they want you dead, you’re dead. They put you in a position where you’re forced to fuck up, and then they end your life.
“Eve—”
“Don’t bother,” I interrupt him, ending the conversation. He’s not wrong. I’ve been trying to drink my life away for years. Why stop now?
KASHTON
She sits in front of the unmarked headstone, and I sit behind her, resting my back against the tree trunk. She leans into me, and I wrap my arms around her waist, my chin perched on her head.
“I’m not even sure why I come here. It just feels right, ya know?”
I don’t say anything, because I don’t have anyone to visit. My mother was cremated and then tossed away. My father is buried at Carnage, but I pretend he never existed. If you ask me, he’s the one who deserves to be forgotten.
“Did Bill tell you about your mother?” I ask her. As sad as it is, she seems happiest when she’s here in the cemetery.
“A little. I was my mom’s second child. She had Evan really young and then was sentenced to be a breeder. After Bill saved me and told me who he was to my mother, I started to dig. I wanted to know if she had more children. But Bill told me that after me, she had a miscarriage. Then another one, and after that, the Lords deemed her unfit to fulfill her duties. So they killed her.”
“Do you believe him?” It makes sense. A life of a breeder ends when they are no longer useful to the Lords. So I’ve been told…
Everett sighs heavily. “I want to. I’d rather her be dead than out there somewhere being forced to breed with the Lords. The sad part is that I’m not even sure which grave is hers. If any of them is her.”
My eyes scan the unmarked graves. There are hundreds. Some have missing pieces and have been stained over time from the weather.
“She was cremated. Her body was of no use, so they destroyed it. Same for my baby. After my stay in the hospital at Carnage, Garrett placed an urn in my room. Said it was my baby that he had cremated. I was eventually dropped off at Dollhouse after Haidyn chose the other woman, and by thetime Bill saved me, I couldn’t go back to Carnage, so I don’t know what happened to my baby.”
“So why this plot? What made you choose this grave?” I ask.
“Because it’s where I’d want to be.” She glances up at the tree I’m leaning against. The same one I stood at when I found her here when I was following her.
I kiss her hair.
“When I die, burn my body and dump me here.”
“Absolutely not.” I deny her absurd request.
“Kash—”
“You will be buried at Carnage next to me. Where you belong.” No exceptions.
She turns in my arms, and I let go of her. A frown on her pretty face. “I want to be cremated.”
