Our relationship happened so quickly. It doesn’t make much sense. Grizz just saw me and what? Fell in love and decided to end whatever fun life he had before? That’s what happened.But maybe it’s real, and his past doesn’t matter—like mine. Or maybe he’s changed his mind. Maybe he’s realized that a woman with more baggage than a cruise ship and a baby aren’t his cup of tea. Maybe he’s ready to be done with me. Maybe, now that I have financial assistance, and have figured out how to mostly get by on my own, he wants me out. Well, maybe if he had the balls to say it to my face, I’d do it.
It will hurt. It’s going to hurt so bad. But I’ve dealt with enough pain in my life—I’ll manage, just like I always do. Dorothea is my main priority these days. And though I love what we have here, not only with Grizz and our baby, but with Tommy and Kelsey too, maybe this isn’t my happily ever after like in the fairytales. Maybe this isn’t how things are supposed to be for me and my daughter.
Just like every other night, Grizz’s truck shuts off, the lights go dark, but he doesn’t get out right away. He hesitates, probably coming up with a cover story or checking for lipstick stains.
All the other nights, I’ve pretended to be asleep. I played dumb, acting like nothing was wrong. But I can’t do that anymore—I won’t. I need to know what the hell he’s doing and who he’s doing it with. It’s obvious this isn’tclub shit. He’s out with a woman—or women.
The seconds pass like eons, until finally the truck door closes. I hear the crunch of the snow under his boots, up onto the porch, then the key sliding into the lock.
My heart pounds harder, and I swear I’m going to be sick. But I have to do this… for my sanity. For Dorothea. She deserves a good life. Not a life where I’m only half here because I’m too stressed to face reality. I can’t do that to her. I’ve done it to myself enough. She deserves more.
Grizz is careful when he comes into the house, trying to be quiet. He must assume I’m asleep. I’m pretty sure he also assumes I’m an idiot.
With his back to me, he closes the front door, takes his boots off, then his jacket. He turns to face me, and freezes, eyes going wide. A second or two passes and he smiles, pretending everything is okay.
“Hey, Angel.”
“Where were you?” I ask, though the words come out shaky.
“Just club shit. Sorry it’s so late.”
Be brave, Anastacia. Don’t let him do this to you.
I’ve let enough men walk all over me. I won’t let him do it, even if I love him. I can’t. It could very well be my undoing.
I take a deep breath, then get to my feet. “Tell me the truth, Grizz.”
His eyes narrow. “I am telling you the truth.”
Shaking my head, I say, “I don’t believe you.”
“Why would I lie?” he asks, sounding offended.
Maybe he isn’t lying? Maybe I’m the crazy one?
No… I’ve thought about this long and hard. I gave myself time to think about it so I would be sure when I confronted him. I purposely let this happen multiple times so I would be sure… so I knew I wasn’t overreacting.
“The same reason anyone else lies,” I say. “Because they’re too cowardly to be truthful.”
His brows shoot up this time. “Now hold on,” he says firmly, stepping closer, but I step back. He pauses, gritting his teeth. “I am not lying to you, Angel,” he says softly. “I have nothing to lie about.”
“Then where were you?”
He gestures toward the door. “I was out handling club business with Snapper.”
“Doing what?”
“You know I can’t tell you that.”
“And why not? Who am I going to tell? I don’t have any friends. No family. You worried I’m going to tell the baby?”
“Don’t be smart,” he says firmly.
“So, that’s the problem then? Am I too smart for you? Do you want me to be some dumb girl who stays in your house while you stay out all night, doing God knows what?”
His brow furrows, and he says, “What do you think I’m doing? Because I sure as fuck hope you don’t think I’m stepping out on you.”
I cross my arms over my chest. “What else am I supposed to think?”
