Crisis averted.
* * *
“Thanks for all your help today,”Julia says as we pull up to my house.
Leaning over the seat, I give her a quick hug. “No problem.”
She pulls back but keeps her gaze on my house. “What’s that?”
I whip around, slamming my elbow on the passenger door. Lying at my front door is a dark red bag of some kind, and next to it are flowers and balloons.
“He remembered,” I murmur, rubbing my elbow.
“Is it your birthday today?” Julia’s tone is incredulous.
I turn back, biting my lip and eyeing her. Her mouth is hanging open and her eyebrows are raised. “Yes.”
“Brynn! You let me go all day without knowing. This is not acceptable. What are you doing tonight?”
I catch myself squirming and force my hands to stay still in my lap. “Seeing Walt.”
Julia lightly smacks her steering wheel. “Saturday night. You and me. Girls only.”
“Sure,” I say, guilt devouring me instantly. I plan to leave Saturday morning. By Saturday afternoon I’ll be on a plane to Dallas, and from there I can go almost anywhere.
“Good,” she nods, smiling.
I open the door and climb out, telling her I’ll see her in two days at the parade. I back up and wave. She pulls away and I walk up to the house.
I was right. It is a bag, but more like a backpack. The flowers are wild, the kind I see growing all over town, and their stems are tied with red and white kitchen twine. My gaze falls on a card tucked under the backpack, just as the breeze sends the balloons bumping into the house. My name is written on the front in Connor’s handwriting. At least I know that for certain.
Scooping everything up, I balance it in one arm and unlock the door with the other. I kick the door closed, glance around, and re-lock it. After dumping everything on the couch, I fill a water glass and place the flowers inside, then go back to the living room.
I start with the backpack. So many zippers, so many compartments. Am I going on a camping trip that I don’t know about? Inside I find mylar blankets, something I can drink through that has a built-in water filter, a first-aid kit, waterproof matches, and a small tool kit.
I’m more confused than ever. Connor didn’t strike me as a guy who needed much direction in the gift-giving department. Maybe I can drop a hint to Julia and she can—
Oh my god.
He’s preparing me.
He’s trying to take care of me after I leave, for as long as he can. He wants to keep me safe.
I grab the card and pull it from the envelope.
Brynn,
I tried writing you a funny rhyme, but it turns out rhyming isn’t as fun when you’re not thinking on your toes.
I’ve thought of all the ways I could make you stay. I’m not above faking a terminal illness, but then I decided I can’t stop you. And I shouldn’t stop you, either. Not when the stakes are so high. So, instead, I’ll do what I can to get you ready to leave. No, I don’t like doing it, but that’s what you do when you love someone. Yeah, I said it. I wrote in pen, so unless I want to cross it out and make the card messy, I’ll just have to leave it there. It’s fine, because I think if you left and I didn’t tell you, I’d regret it forever.
I hope wherever you end up, you find peace. I hope you forgive yourself. I hope you show life who’s the boss. Me. I’m the boss, remember? Okay, enough. I’m making jokes and rambling because I’m sad, and I love you.
Two times. I said it two times.
Love,
Connor
