As much as I want to believe the cravings I’m feeling are only carnal and coming from a place of lust, I know it’s more than that.
I don’t just miss how she felt, but I’m missing her determination and the intensity I had seen in her before.
Now, it’s mostly silence, but other times, it’s subtle teasing. The faintest signs that she’s well aware of what she’s doing to me. She knows it’s killing me.
Sometimes, she speaks with a softness that makes me wish I could pull her against me, or she gives me those looks when she assumes I’m not watching. She’ll brush past me with the lightest touch, pretending like it was perfectly accidental.
And as strong as I try to be, I fall for it every time. Honestly, it’s becoming pathetic, but I can’t help it.
She won’t let me touch her since that night, and I’m starting to lose it.
The frustration clings to me as I drive to one of our warehouses, hearing and feeling the steady engine beneath me, but it does nothing to calm the noise in my head and the longing in my chest that was once so foreign to me.
I’m supposed to keep my head down. I’m married, and according to Roman, I fucked some things up by putting myself in that situation. The heat from that decision of mine should be dying down by now, but as far as I can tell, everything is on fire.
I haven’t been checking in with everything as often as I should be, favoring trying to figure things out with Kat over committing myself to the job like I should. To extinguish the flames of what I caused.
It would be the right thing to do, and I know that, but she has been occupying my mind so completely.
Walking through the front, I catch a few curious glances in my direction, surely realizing I haven’t been around in a bit, but they quickly correct themselves and continue with their tasks.
It doesn’t take long before I find Nikolai standing nearby with a folder in his hand, skimming over the contents until he notices me. He gives me a grim look.
“What is it?” I ask, already feeling impatient.
He lifts a brow at me. “You haven’t heard yet?”
“I just got here. Spit it out, Nik.”
Sighing, he nods towards the catwalk above our heads where Roman paces, boots clinking against iron. That’s not a good sign.
“There was another hit.”
“On who?” I ask, brows furrowing, well aware that this isn’t about to be the start of an easy day.
“A handful of associates. They were shot outside a club just down the strip. It’s spreading quickly, and a few of our big investors are trying to back out. Even some long-standing ones,” Nik explains, not hiding how unideal a situation this has become.
“Fuck sakes…” I mutter under my breath, scrubbing a hand over my face.
This is far from good, that’s obvious enough.
Roman’s voice cuts through the space, drawing our attention to him. “Sergey. Get your ass up here now.”
I freeze instinctively, then I pull in a breath and exchange a glance with Nik before heading up.
The moment I’m within reaching distance, Roman grabs my shoulder and pulls me into his office. He wastes no time getting in my face with his eyes narrowed.
“This is exactly what I said would happen,” he begins, tone sharp and unyielding. “You thought throwing a ring at Katya would make Yuri roll over? You really believed that was the route to take?”
I brace myself, gritting my teeth. “It was a calculated risk.”
“Calculated?” He nearly barks out with a scoff. “Sergey, you kidnapped your target and married her when all you had to do was monitor her movements and know without a shadow of a doubt if she was working with her brother. What you did isn’t a strategy. It was ridiculous, and frankly, it’s hurting us more than it ever should have.”
My blood boils, even if I understand his anger and concern. “It’s no different from what you did, or Mikhail, for that matter.”
Roman’s expression hardens at that, and he forces out a breath, letting go of my shirt with a subtle shove to back me up. “That was different.”
“How? It’s quite literally the same on paper.”
