A bitter laugh escapes me, sharp at the edges. “I’vebeendistant? That’s real cute Jacob. I could fall off the face of the earth and the best you’ll manage is a dry good morning text days later.”
His eyes narrow. “You’re tripping, Jainey. I just been working and shit. You know that. And I have been texting you—making sure you’re okay.”
Tripping.That word slices through me like glass. Like my feelings are some bad habit I should kick. The crack between us splits wider, right here in the middle of my living room.
My chest tightens, voice shaking no matter how hard I try to hold it steady. “Working? Or partying and fucking Rebecca? And don’t fucking play dumb with me. I went through your phone last time you were here. I saw everything.”
His face freezes—half a second, but enough. Enough to confirm what I already know.
“Why the fuck are you going through my shit? I thought we trusted each other? She doesn’t mean anything, man, I swear. If you’d just asked me instead of playing detective, maybe I could’ve explained. But instead, you’re just assuming shit.”
The truth’s out.
He’s been with her. I can fill in the rest based off of his messages that are stored in my brain. My throat burns, but I steel myself. I refuse to cry—he doesn’t deserve that anymore.
“Ask you? So you can lie to my face like you’re doing right now? I’m sick of it, Jacob. You fucked me and went straight to her after, didn’t you? Just tell me. Please. Just say it out loud.” I plead.
He exhales, jaw tight. “Fine, fuck. Yes. I went to her after I was with you that Monday, okay? Fuck, I’m sorry, Jainey. But you know shit’s been off between us for a minute now… I think I just need to do me. This relationship ain’t what it used to be, and I know you see it too. I just don’t know if I want to try anymore.”
The words gut me. How could he not want to try anymore. Like every promise, every I love you—means nothing. My eyes sting, tears building, but I blink them back hard. He will not have my tears.
Not now anyways.
“So um you’re leaving me for ugly-ass Rebecca? That’s hilarious. Aftereverythingwe’ve been through, and you don’t even want to try? Fine. You got it, Jacob.” My voice cracks, but I point to the door anyway, every nerve in me shaking. “Just leave—get the fuck out.”
His jaw locks, eyes darting away before snapping back, full of something I can’t read—guilt, anger, maybe both.
“Fine. I’m out. Think whatever you want—just I told you what it is… but you have a good life, Jainey.”
He doesn’t even look back when he walks out the door. A part of me wants to scream his name, beg him to stay, to try for us, for me.
But I don’t move. I sit frozen, nails digging crescents into my palms, holding back tears until I hear the slam of the car door and the rumble of his engine fading out of the driveway.
Only then do I let myself breathe.
My chest aches like it’s been ripped wide open, but somewhere under all that pain… there’s a flicker of freedom. I steady my breathing, biting my lip until I taste copper.
When Arina comes home, she won’t see me broken. She’ll see me free, trying to move on. If Jacob thinks he left me crushed, he better think again.
Still, the truth stabs. I just lost the one person I trusted enough to love me. The boy who was once my oxygen just walked away like I not worth fighting for—hell, he actually said it too. I lean back on the couch, arms wrapped tight around myself, whispering into the empty room.
Don’t cry over him. Fuck him.
But the silence stretches, the night dragging, and no matter how hard I try, I feel myself splintering. In my room, the walls feel too quiet, too empty. My chest is heavy, my eyes burning, but I choke the tears down. I pull my knees to my chest, hold myself tight, because no one else is here to do it.
I’m so tired—tired of letting people decide my worth. My mom. My so-called friends. And now him. Every time I hand over pieces of myself, they walk away with them. But not anymore.
Love isn’t supposed to feel like this, but tonight he showed me exactly where I stand. And I’m not what he wants anymore.
If I’m not enough for him, then fuck him. And fuck Rebecca too. I hope she does him the same way he did me.
Karma’s a bitch, and she’ll always get her turn.
? ??
It’s close to midnight when I hear Arina staggering inside. A second later she’s knocking on my door, voice high pitched and obviously drunk.
“I know you’re awake, Jainey!” She slurs, not waiting for a response before swinging the door open like always.
