I didn’twantto frighten Cole, but the thought of him giving himself to the hounds under some misguided assumption it would reunite him with his brother was enough to make me lose whatever sensibility I might have had. They occasionally gathered wayward souls in one piece if they’d somehow gotten lost, but anyone who intentionally defied their Master paid a violent price.
I’d already accepted the fact that I was going to reap more souls before their time to take their Vitality—not for Death, but to keep Cole alive. It was clear that being away from me had cut off the supply flowing between us, that I hadn’t just brought him back to life when the Enmity attacked by forging the soulmate bond between us and feeding it to him once.
I needed to be close—he needed a constant supply. He was feeding off the life of others, and without it, his soul detached from his body. I didn’t know if it was so he could try to find me, or if the natural order of things was trying to force the death I’d prevented.
I just knew that I couldn’t let it happen—that I wasn’t going to be able to go back to the Lake, back to Death. I wasn’t going to be able to continue making him think I was doing my duties.
I had to stay with Cole.
I had tokillfor Cole.
And I didn’t know if I could tell him that’s what I was doing for him. I was pretty sure if I tried, he’d do everything he could to stop me.
But judging by the way he was shaking so violently in my arms, I had a feeling it wouldn’t be by way of the hounds.
Not anymore.
After they’d finished devouring the scraps of the soul that I’d torn apart, there was a moment where the same fear pulsing through Cole’s body poured into mine. My hand slid up, pressing against his nose. I didn’t have to say anything to let him know what I meant. He held his breath.
The hounds sniffed, the wet sound deeper now that they’d been fed, and I walked us back until the wall hid us from sight. Though it wasn’t like they actually had to see their quarry to know what they were looking for.
But between the body I’d left behind and the way I was casting my essence over Cole, relief poured through me when I felt the looming presence of the beasts leave the alley with the heavy footfall of paws on pavement before it disappeared.
“Are they gone?” Cole’s voice was shaking when he spoke, and I nodded.
“Yes, they’re gone… but I don’t know how much longer we can keep them off our scent. Especially when I don’t come back.” Saying the words aloud made it feel permanent. Final.
I couldn’t go back.
I could never go back as long as I was with Cole, and if I had my way… that meant forever.
“What does that mean?” His voice was soft and shellshocked, still holding the slightest tremble after everything that had happened.
“It means we need to move.” It meant more than that—it meant that I was going to compromise everything I was, everything I’d been for centuries, to keep him safe. As much as I wanted to tell him the whole of it, I wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle the truth after everything that had just happened.
I wasn’t sure he’d accept the fact that I was going to end life to keep him safe, to keep him tethered to his body and throw the hounds off his scent.
It was strange—I was a bringer of death, a creature made to ferry souls… but I wasn’t actually a killer.
At least, I’d never been until Cole. For him, I’d break apart my purpose and build myself into something new. I would be the monster he thought I was if it meant I could keep him safe. Whole.
If it meant I could keep him with me.
Chapter 15
Cole
I couldn’t getthe sound of the hounds out of my head as I let Sephtis lead us through the streets. A part of me was probably in shock from someone trying to kill me. I wasn’t sure when I was going to have time to processanythingbetween dying twice and needing to accept that I was tethered to the man I’d hated for the last year, the man I’d craved while I slept because he was the only thing that made the nightmares go away.
Hate and guilt and desire were all wrapped up in a stoic form that kept stealing my choices… my sanity.
I didn’t know if I could ever forgive him for all the things he’d done, but I finally realized I couldn’t run from him if I didn’t want to be ripped apart by those hounds.
I’d never see Caiden again if that happened, would I? I’d never see Caiden, and… even though I wasn’t sure I was ready to admit it aloud, there was something about the insistence in Sephtis’s voice that made me want to stay, even if it was just so I could tell him how much I despised him for doing this to me.
I knew it was easier to tell myself that was the only reason.
“Where are we going?” I asked for what felt like the hundredth time. He’d started in a direction I didn’t recognize after I’d finally stopped shaking from my close up with whatwould happen if I were caught. He hadn’t said a word, and I was starting to wonder if he was angry with me.
