My stomach swirled as the footage began to play. A burning building, with the roof beginning to cave in. Shaky camera angles darted around a debris covered street, and police lights flashed against the orange blaze. The camera zoomed in onfigures struggling in front of the chaos. Blond hair and a black uniform made my body go rigid.
Leo pulled against four Heroes, fire spitting out as he shouted, attempting to run back inside. I recognized two of them; a Hero that had an affinity for ice, and another whose body was made of steel. Frost pushed against his skin, attempting to stifle his flames, and keep its own damage minimal. They held him back by his arms and torso, shaking their heads as he writhed.
I’d never seen him look so desperate.
“… Hero Cinder had tried to go back in after learning of the mistake. In a heartbreaking display, his comrades held him back?—”
“—Leo was there,” I breathed.
I knew that, but seeing it now made my heart break, made tears well in my eyes as something started to chew in my mind.
Reed tensed beside me. “… You two haven’t talked about it yet, have you?”
“About what?”
A nagging, gnawing fact made my chest burn as my breath started to come in quick gasps. It had been a communication failure, and the building ended up in flames. The truth poured into me, and I wanted to reject it, wanted to act like I’d never seen the footage. I couldn’t face this, couldn’t let the reality destroy me.
“I started the fire,” Leo’s voice was a husk behind us. “It was my fault, Alex.”
I was drowning.
My chest was too tight, my skin suffocating, the new implants on my head making my dark apartment flash blue each time my ability attempted to push me into a daydream I didn’t want. It would have been easier—sleep, and live in whatever paradise my mind created. This pain, this overwhelming sense ofdread —it was going to undo everything.
Leo and Iworkedto change. We put in the effort, made decisions that were hard, that would make us better. I thought we were healing together. Piece by piece, recreating ourselves and leaving the past behind us.
He didn’t tell me.
After amonth,he didn’t say a word. Didn’t confess, or explain anything. I could understand why in the beginning. But now? After everything — getting closer, fuck—sleeping together.Everything had fallen apart.Again.
It took only thirty minutes for a knock to come at my door; record time, for five p.m. in Nightmyre. I couldn’t hold back the tears as it swung open, and Minnie rushed in.
“Oh,cariño.” Her dark eyes softened as her purse dropped to the floor, and she brought me in for a hug. “It’s alright. You’ll be okay.”
Minnie couldn’t lie, but I didn’t know how to believe her. Everything collapsed just as it had hit its peak. My lips pulled into my teeth as I suppressed a sob and nodded.
“I’m sorry,” my voice was a broken whisper. “I didn’t know what to do.”
She guided me to the couch, sat us down, and pulled my favorite oversized blanket across our laps. “You call me; that’s what you do.”
“This feels unethical,” I hiccuped as I attempted to smile. “Like a patient-therapist boundary or something.”
Minnie took my hands in hers and leaned in with narrowed brows. “Alex, honey, we are so far past that. You work withmy husband—it’s been a conflict of interest from the start. That was a risk I was willing to take, and I’ve never regretted it. You’re family now. And, I may have omitted the fact that since you’ve returned to the VIA, I technicallycan’tbe your therapist anymore.”
I cocked my head, confusion breaking through the all-out despair I’d been feeling since I got home. Minnie had continued to see me every Wednesday, just like normal.
“The VIA is strict; everything is so confidential, you know. Luckily, that woman—Dahlia, I believe—gave us some leniency. I wasn’t going to bring it up until I felt you were ready. In fact, I was planning on breaking the news this week.” She grimaced. “Bad timing, I suppose.”
The whole despair thing? That came back twofold. I put my head in my hands, sobs wracking my body, while Minnie rubbed gentle circles between my shoulder blades. After the news and Leo, it was all too much. I hadn’t said anything to him before I left. He didn’t chase me this time either.
I thought a therapy session would help, but I couldn’t find the words, and didn't have anything to say. This, at least, felt right. Having someone I trusted by my side, sitting in silence, holding space. How was I supposed to react? What was I supposed to feel?
It was a mix of sadness and anger. The strange part was that I wasn’t angry with Leo; I was furious with myself. For three years, I’d put it off, run away from the morbid details that would make Joon’s deathreal. Even without my ability, I’d put myself under a daydream. If I didn’t have the facts, it didn’t really happen. This could have been avoided, if only I had a fucking backbone. But what then? If I had known three years ago, when Leo was still someone to loathe, would we have gotten closer?
No.
“I know he didn’t lie technically,” I choked out finally. “I just…”
Minnie rubbed away my tears with a tissue as she tilted my chin up. “Betrayal can still exist without lies, and being upset about it doesn’t mean you’ve taken steps backward.”
