She didn’t want to look at him again. She wanted to just get their arrangement ironed out and be done with it. She knew a part of her was grieving for the secret dream, the pure fantasy of a home and family, a man who loved her alone. Who would always put her first. Benedek would never be that man. Still, she was determined to make this work.
“It just feels as if I’m the one making all the concessions. You want me to agree to become Carpathian. You want to be able to command me when you deem it necessary. I’m human. My mother is human. I’m a demon slayer. That’s a huge part of who I am. If I sleep during the day, who is protecting my people? Not you. Not your friends. There’s only me. If I join you, they are open to attack.”
“We are working the terms out,” Benedek pointed out.
This time his rasp held a note of gentleness. She really didn’t want him using that particular tone. She was far too susceptible to it.
“I agree to getting your consent before I use my voice to make a demand, unless the situation is extreme and I must make a split-second decision.”
“What would be considered extreme?” She took a drink from the glass of water Fenja had placed in front of her.
“Keeping you from a mortal wound. Life or death. If your life wasin danger and I needed to ensure your survival, I reserve the right to use my voice to save you.”
How could she object to that? She swept a hand through her hair, uncaring that he would note that gesture as nerves. She was nervous. “What’s to say you wouldn’t deem any event extreme if you didn’t like what I was doing?”
“Trust,” he answered immediately. “I would like for our bond to be so tight that you know I will always have your back. Always have your best interests uppermost in mind. That you will trust me to put your happiness and welfare first. I want to trust you with those same things. I want to know, without looking, without question, that I can trust you to put me first. To put my health and welfare first. I want to know you will always have my back. To do that, I must trust you the same way you must learn to trust me.”
She liked the practicality of that. “I agree to your terms, then.”
Fenja and Nicu immediately wrote on their papers, giving Silke some satisfaction that they had managed to sort out his ability to command her.
“I wish to live close to my mother as long as she is alive.”
Benedek nodded immediately. “I would expect us to stay close to her. She’s your family, and when we become lifemates, she becomes my family and will be under not only our protection but the protection of all my people.”
Again, Fenja and Nicu wrote on their papers. Silke couldn’t help the small triumphant smile she sent her mother’s way. Negotiating wasn’t nearly as bad as she thought it would be.
“I must remain the slayer until after the battle with Lilith,” she said as firmly as she could. “The people have to be protected. I will agree to the lifemate bond as soon as the war with her is over.”
He shook his head. “The conversion will wait until after the battle, but I must claim you immediately. Having found you, I do not dare wait. Once I bind us, my soul will be intact and you’ll anchor me duringevery battle with the vampire and Lilith’s army. That is absolutely necessary.”
She heard the ring of truth in his voice. He hadn’t demanded that she become Carpathian immediately. That seemed like a huge concession on his part. It also made that silly part of her that still had girlhood fantasies a little sad because it wasn’t necessary to him for her to be with him immediately. She couldn’t be, but she still wanted him to want to be with her. She knew it was all about returning his soul to him.
She decided to look on the bright side. The longer she was able to put off becoming Carpathian, the better it was for her. And it was entirely possible she wouldn’t survive the coming war. Lilith was sending demons specifically targeting the slayer.
As if he were reading her mind, and he probably was, he reached out and took her hand, pulling her arm across the space between them so he could press her palm against his chest. “I will agree to these terms only if you agree to be prepared to become Carpathian in an emergency. It takes three exchanges for the conversion. I want your consent for two exchanges. That way, should you fall during a conflict with demons, I would be able to recover you.”
He had such a strange way of putting things. She took her time studying every word just in case she wouldn’t want to agree.
“Blood exchanges?”
He nodded, his gaze fixed on hers, compelling her to agree.
“I want to agree, Benedek, but the idea is rather horrifying.”
“I assure you it won’t be. You are my true lifemate. We are very compatible. As I said before, you will find the exchanges erotic, not repugnant.”
She wasn’t so certain, but she was rather shocked to find the depth of her physical attraction to him. In any case, if she was agreeing to become Carpathian at some point, there would have to be an exchange of blood.
“You can write that one down.”
Part Three
(Left) Search for truth. Making important choices. Called to account.
(Right) Enter the darkness. Confront inner fears. Free yourself from chains that bind you.
Chapter
