CHAPTER24
The ships areall tucked in for the night. As we swim between them, avoiding their barnacles and sea moss, I can’t help but wonder how my last six months might have been spent if my ship hadn’t been attacked.
I would’ve had six more months with my sister and parents. Maybe I could’ve negotiated again with the council after Charles had left for his lighthouse. They called it a “final judgment,” but Mother taught me there’s always the possibility of squeezing in one more word before the negotiation ends. Perhaps I might have realized I wasn’t on my own—that I didn’t have to bear the sole responsibility for caring for everyone around me to make up for things I didn’t actually lack—sooner. Maybe, once I realized that, Emily could’ve helped me win over the council.
What if…could’ve…what might have been… The words that bookend my entire existence. The wondering that will follow me to my grave.
“Will here—” Ilryth is interrupted by a sharp, deafening chime that ripples through the water. He winces, reeling, clutching his chest as though he were stabbed through the heart.
The sound is trying to tear me apart. The magical contours of my body vibrate and distort. I struggle to keep myself together, as though my sheer willpower is the only thing binding me together. Though it’s hard to keep my thoughts clear amid the resonant noise of the bell.
The sound fades and Ilryth takes a moment to collect himself. I do the same.
“That was a lighthouse, wasn’t it?” I manage to ask, even though I already know the answer.
“It was.”
“Well, they work,” I mutter. Not just against siren song, but the wraiths as well. If only there were a way I could tell the humans that. The sirens aren’t our enemies, not in the way we thought. The notion almost makes me feel guilty for ringing the bell so often. But the emotion is fleeting when I think of a wraith-possessed siren coming to claim Emily as they tried to claim me.
Hopefully, when this is over, when I succeed, the bells and cotton-stuffed ears will become a thing of the past. Humans, not knowing why, will realize the seas aren’t as dangerous as they once thought. It might take decades, but maybe there would even come a day where families would willingly sit along the beach and admire the horizons I took for granted every time I went out on a ship.
If Ilryth hears my muttering, he says nothing in response, instead continuing to swim along the wharf, underneath the shadows of the docks and pylons. The sensation of it is akin to falling into a mirror and landing in the world on the other side—somewhere that looks so similar to all you know, but different. Reversed. For the first time in weeks, I’m aware of every kick of my legs, each turn to glide nimbly through the water. This was once my home, I walked these docks countless times, and now I’m a shadow beneath them. A ghost of my former self returning to a place that I no longer belong.
The city above is quiet. It’s late. But I can catch glimpses of familiar buildings through the wooden slats above me. I pause at one that threatens to bring tears anew.
The usually quiet tavern is pulsing with light and sound. I can almost feel rumblings in the water as dancing feet shake its foundations into the rock below. I’m unable to see into the thick porthole windows from this vantage. But the stream of people that leave, causing us to sink deeper beneath the surface of the water, is all I need to know.
“That’s my family’s tavern,” I whisper. “And it’s thriving.” Perhaps it’s pity. Perhaps I’ve become folklore. Or maybe my family was finally able to separate themselves from the black mark I brought upon them. Either way, seeing them doing well has me heaving a sigh of relief.
“Is it? I always wondered why you spent so much time there.”
“It was my father’s dream. My mother kept trading past when she would’ve otherwise stopped so they had the crons to do it. I pitched in, too. Em also…” I trail off, staring in awe.You did it, Pa. Everyone knows how good your ale tastes now.
“We shouldn’t linger.” Ilryth touches my elbow lightly.
“I know.” Yet I don’t move. I want to stay until it’s late enough for Em, or Father, or Mother to come out and collect the sandwich board.Just to see them one last time…
“Victoria.”
“Right. Over here.” Jolted from the futile notions, I guide us to a collection of nets not far away. “We’ll put the chest here.”
“Are you sure it’ll get to them like this?”
I nod. “These are my father’s nets. He collects whatever fish lands in them for his broils and stews.”
Ilryth moves when there’s no one around, wedging the box into the heart of the net and wrapping the ropes around it several times. I can’t stop myself from making some adjustments after he finishes.
“My knots weren’t good enough?” Ilryth folds his arms.
“Not at all. But don’t worry, you have a sailor for a friend now.”
“Friend?” He arches a single, pale eyebrow.
“You’ve seen me cry. Only my closest friends have seen me cry.” I shrug. In truth…only about three people have ever seen me cry, Ilryth included. But he doesn’t need to know he’s among such an exclusive party.
“You need to have some more positive thresholds for friendships.” He continues scanning the docks above us. “We should leave before someone can see us.”
“I know.” On both accounts. I run my fingers over the chest one last time. I’ve etched my name into its top. It holds my compass. My family will know.
