He certainly couldn’t cast the first stone.
Still, he had permission to court Lista and he didn’t take that lightly, but he knew he had a task ahead of him making her forget about Julian and having her focus on him. He knew he could do it given time, and hopefully her willingness, and he felt strongly that this was something he wanted very much. Whether or not Julian deserved her was immaterial.
It boiled down to the fact that Louis wanted her.
“I was told you were up here.” Lista suddenly appeared from the stairwell, her soft voice breaking into his thoughts. When Louis turned to look at her, she smiled politely. “Although Iadmire your sense of duty, I’m not entirely sure the night watch is your responsibility. Looking for more Scots?”
He grinned. “One can never tell,” he said. “There were a few grapes left on the vines. They might return for those. You never know.”
Lista’s smile turned genuine. “Quite true,” she said. “They might return for the last apple or the last grape. We have a cherry tree at the edge of the garden, so surely, they would want to strip that, too.”
He was leaning on the wall, looking at her over his shoulder. “Are the cherries ripe?”
“Almost.”
“I like cherry pudding. I just thought you should know.”
Lista chuckled. “They will give you a bellyache if you eat them now,” she said. “Cherry pudding will have to wait.”
“I can wait.”
It was a statement with many different meanings. Lista sensed that right away because her smile faded. With a sigh, she leaned against the wall a few feet away from him.
“Louis, I think we must talk,” she said. “I have just come from my aunt and mother.”
He nodded. “I see,” he said. “And how are Lady Felkington and Lady d’Orbec?”
Lista shrugged. “How are they ever?” she said. “Inhaling hemp leaf smoke. Or sometimes, it’s eating the fungus that grows in the forest. Other times, it’s licking the green moss on the walls in the hope it will give them visions or make them giddy. I could go on and on, but suffice it to say they will never change. Any husband I have will need to accept that burden and it is too much to bear.”
Louis grunted softly as he returned his attention to the silver-cast landscape. “Don’t you think he should be the one to make that decision?”
Lista shook her head. “Nay,” she said. “I do not think he should. I thinkIshould. Louis, you may as well know that the only reason my mother and aunt wish for me to marry you is so that they can re-establish their social standing. That is all they want you for, I am sorry to say, and that is unfair to you. You are a man of integrity and kindness and you deserve far better than the ravaged baggage I would bring with me.”
He looked at her again. “Do you try to scare me?”
“I try to warn you.”
“I do not need to be warned,” he said. “I am a grown man. I understand this situation. Your aunt is a desperate woman, desperate enough to give me permission to court you when I suspect your mother did not.”
“How did you know?”
He shrugged. “Call it a suspicion,” he said. “Was she like this with de Velt?”
Lista shook her head. “Not at all,” she said. “Mayhap she simply didn’t have time. We had not known Julian long before you appeared. All she had to hear was that you were the son of the Earl of Sunderland and you became her prime objective.”
Louis scratched his neck pensively. “I am not troubled by the Lady d’Orbecs of this world,” he said. “It does not change my interest in you. I am still very interested in courting you but, of course, given the fact that your mother did not give her permission, I will seek yours instead. I realize you had your heart set on Julian, my lady, but all I ask is that you give me a fair chance, too. I promise I will not disappoint you.”
It was an earnest plea. Lista found herself looking at him, his handsome face beneath the moonlight, but try as she might, she simply couldn’t feel any inclination to agree with him. Had there never been a Julian, she could easily see herself being agreeable towards him. But Julian was a ghost between them, a ghost that would never leave. Although she hadn’t known him for verylong, the man had marked her enough so that she knew she wouldn’t be able to easily forget him. If at all.
Sighing heavily, she averted her gaze and leaned back against the wall.
“I simply do not know,” she said honestly. “All of this has happened so quickly. I do not know what I am feeling or what I am thinking other than I am extremely disappointed and sad that Julian left. I am quite fond of him.”
“Do you love him?”
It was a blunt question. Lista lifted her head, turning to look at him. “Don’t you think that’s between Julian and me?” she said softly.
But Louis shook his head. “Nay,” he said. “I have a stake in this, too. I think it is a quite reasonable question given the circumstances.”
