With a quick nod, his lips curled into his mouth, he turned and left the room without looking back. I beat my head against the raised bed, fighting the tears burning the backs of my eyes. It rivaled the burning numbness in my legs, but nothing could touch the pain of the doctor’s words.
“Sergeant Marin, you need to prepare yourself for what could be your new normal.”
“What are you talking about? I’m gonna heal and get back to my unit.”
“I don’t see that happening, unfortunately. The fractures have caused some issues, as you know. Walking without assistance will be the goal.”
Realization hit me, and I asked, “Will I… Doc, I’m married, will I be able to… perform in other ways?”
“Recovering function sexuallyshouldhappen, but it will take time, and may require some… creative thinking.”
Knowing now what I didn’t then, I hated myself for… fuck, everything.
For telling him to leave.
For not calling him back.
For not giving him a chance to explain.
For wasting what time we’d had before my life changed.
For still feeling raw and betrayed that he kept the truth from me.
For making him think it was because he wasn’t submissive enough.
For fucking everything up so many times and on so many levels.
For being too fucking piss-my-pants scared to unfuck the mess I’d made of both our lives.
Shaking my head, I headed to the house and into the kitchen. I had to eat. Otherwise, I would be puking the meds back up soon. As I walked in the back door, Lucia appeared as if she’d been waiting for me.
I was in no fucking mood, and she should’ve known that, but she pushed her luck anyway.
“I’m still not talking to you. So, you best walk the fuck away.”
Tears filled her eyes, and she turned to leave, but turned back and said, “I did it for you. You’re fucking miserable without him, and I care about my friend too much not to do everything in my power to fix things for you.”
“Let’s see how you feel when I ‘try’ to fix your life without your permission or input.”
She walked off with a nod. I made my way through the house, pausing at the door to the kitchen. Voices echoed from within, breaking up the silence of the rest of the house.
“How long have you worked for Katie?”
“Almost from the beginning.”
“What’s it like?”
“Exciting. There are never two days the same. Even if she’s just chilling on the bus or at home, we’re going through social media, making posts, talking about what’s coming up, and all the while she’s tinkering on the guitar or writing music.”
“I heard she writes all her music.”
“She does. The label tries to push her to things they think will be a hit, but she’s pretty adamant about her sound and what she puts out. So, mostly it’s all Katie all the time.”
Silverware scraping and tapping against dishware filled the air until the cute as shit girl who worked for Katie spoke again.
“So, what’s being a bodyguard like? The only one I’ve met is Danny, and well, like I said, he gave me the creeps.”
“It can be exciting as fuck and as boring as shit. Most of the time, I follow someone around while they shop or go to the gym. Other times, it’s like this. An actual threat, and while I’m always vigilant when working, times like these are super-charged from the jump.”
