Gemma thought about Lothar and wondered if she should tell her father what she had seen.
It would go a long way to ensuring he does not marry you. Your father would not tolerate this type of behavior.Gemma thought as she joined Ashley in the queue.
Would it not be mean to do so? It might be better to see what type of man he was. There is the possibility that there is some decency in him. That he would do the proper thing and tell her father he still sees another woman. I also cannot help but have hope that I have misunderstood the situation and that the rumor about his heart being that unpleasant witch’s, was in actual fact only just that, a rumor.
Gemma looked out through the shop’s large, arched window. The handmade glass did not allow her to see the people’s faces outside, but she could not mistake Lothar’s large frame as he walked past the dry goods store. He looked to be alone and in search of something.
Or someone? Surely not. He could not possibly think he could smooth things over after what I had seen between him and the Baroness Whitcombe!
Gemma had to fight the overwhelming urge to go over to him. She wished more than ever that he had been different.
I am not disappointed! Gemma thought as she clenched her jaw to suppress more tears that tightened her throat.Gemma got to the front of the queue were she paid for the goods in her basket as well as asked for a large sack of flour for the house and tobacco for her father.
He had given up smoking at a stage and now only allowed it as a guilty pleasure occasionally His face would light up everytime she would remember his coffee or tobacco. Gemma had gotten the fabric her mother had asked for and had purchased what the house required. Now she could leave town and not stand the chance of running into Lothar.
There was nothing he could say to improve her mood or opinion of him at this point. So she had thought when she had left the dry goods store and headed toward her carriage.
“My Lady, please allow me to explain,” Lothar said as he ran up to her from a distance. Ashley left her side and gave them the privacy she did not want. Being alone with him made her heart beat faster even though he had hurt it.
Chapter 12
Lothar stood in front of Gemma, surprised she had given him another chance after what she had just seen. He felt guilty even though all he felt for Henny now was contempt. He had merely shown concern for her and could not allow her to hurt herself. It may have been a way of manipulation, but Henny had known Lothar would catch her. He always had and she thought that he always would.
He had been a complete fool giving Henny yet another chance when he could have something good with Gemma, something real.
Mother had warned me not to let Henny ruin a future I might have with Gemma. It was not easy to remove her from my life and my heart. At the same time I find Gemma taking up residence in my heart faster than Henny ever had. The thought of losing her feels greater a loss than to finally let go of Henny.Lothar thought as he searched her face and his mind for the words that could make this right between them.
Her expression when she had seen him with Henny had made his chest constrict his breathing. He had not meant to hurt her and had let her down so soon.
“Your Grace, I do not believe there needs any explanation,” Gemma said quietly. Lothar had almost forgotten how sweet her voice sounded.
How could I have let myself be such a fool!
“My Lady, I apologize if what you witnessed seemed distasteful. Henny, Baroness Whitcomb, had a fainting spell and I simply assisted. I may have overcompensated as I lost a family member with the condition,” Lothar started to explain. He spoke without thinking first hoping she would see that he was sincere.
He had not once in his life been with more than one woman in his life. To be seen as a man who would take a relationship lightly was bad enough. He had made it plain that he wanted to marry her. Now perhaps she viewed him as a man who took something as sacred as marriage as though it was a trifle matter
“Your Grace, though it is admirable that you showed concern, I do not think that is all you feel for her,” Gemma replied.
“While it is true, My Lady, that I did have feelings for the baroness, her feelings for me never did. Marriage is not a possibility,” Lothar replied.
“May I be frank, Your Grace?” Gemma asked and took a step towards him.
“Always My Lady,” Lothar replied immediately. He took a deep breath of relief that she was speaking to him at least. Even if it meant the next words would banish him from her life.
“Your Grace, since marriage to the baroness is not an option, then am I to assume I am second choice?” Gemma asked. Lothar tried to find any sign of humor in her stony gaze and regretfully did not find any.
“Not at all, My Lady,” Lothar said, and Gemma narrowed her eyes.
I do not think that was enough to impress her,Lothar thought.
“Your Grace, why do you want to marry me?” Gemma asked. Her tone was level and held little emotion behind it. Lothar felt panic grip him as he realized that he may have lost Gemma already.
She had gone from a woman he had met and formed an immediate bond with. Then she had seemed a completely different person. He had thought then that there was nothing worse. Looking at her now. Her face and words without emotion.He now felt further away from her, and he did not know how to remedy it.
“Because I believe we are a good match, My Lady. I think we would be good for each other,” Lothar answered.
“Good for each other in what way, Your Grace?” I know that the funds you will receive from marrying me will be good for you. What is it I would get that would benefit me?” Gemma asked.
