“It was meant as lighthearted conversation, as requested.” I smiled, but I wasn't sure it reached my eyes. He was so intense about every little thing.
“I see that now. Sometimes I forget you’re very kind.”
“I’m naïve. Sheltered. Naturally smart in what I apply myself to, but not street smart.”
Picking up more french fries, he said, “You could be bitter after the life you’ve led, but you’re not.”
I had to laugh. “Oh, but I am. Haven't my coworkers told you otherwise?”
When Noah studied me so intently, I had to force myself not to squirm. “It’s a hard outer shell, isn’t it, Sailor? You’ve had no choice but to guard your heart against the emotions you so desperately want to feel.”
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I tried for a casual tone of voice. “You said no heavy conversation.”
“You’re right.” He nodded. “But I felt that it needed to be said. The others are wrong about you because they make surface judgments without getting to know the real you.”
“I don't let them get to know me.”
There was nothing to know, anyway. Nothing but broken emptiness.
“And why should you? They’re assholes.”
“Where did this nicer side of you come from?” Though I might be treading on thin ice, I needed his answer. “You hated me at first sight.”
“I was wrong.” Reaching out, Noah ran his fingertips over the back of my hand. “God, I was so angry at your hospital for the way they treated Dad. And then on top of that, they couldn't stop him from leaving when I thought they should. I was so sure he’d die within the first forty-eight hours, and I would’ve treated anyone like shit because I wanted him under constant monitoring. Even though I hated the doctor assigned to him, at least at Grandview, someone could save him if he coded.”
“Even though it makes sense, you terrified me.”
He smirked. “Really? You acted indifferent to my threats.”
“You think you’re the first family member to intimidate me? I’ve been through it all, Noah, and I had no choice but to develop a thick skin.”
“Have you gotten too used to it, though? Putting up walls and never letting anyone in?”
“I’m sure.” His constant touch had raised goosebumps on my arms beneath my long sleeves. “No one has cared to get past them so far.”
“What if I do?”
“I’ve already cured your father. There’s no need to pretend anymore.”
He frowned, and I bit my lip. I hadn't meant that to sound as if I was the one pretending, but that was exactly how it came out.
“Who’s been pretending?”
My belly trembled at the heat in his gaze. “I meant you don't have to pretend to care about me so I’ll treat Benito properly.”
“That’s not it.” Sighing, he took his hand back, and I missed the contact. “You’ve grown on me, Sailor.”
Wrapping my arms around my waist, I retorted, “Like a black mold infestation?”
He chuckled. “No, like a tenacious weed.”
“As if that’s any better,” I said with a scowl.
“Winding around me until I can’t stop thinking about you.”
Tears filled my eyes. For so long, I’d been hollow inside. Why did the man I set out to destroy have to chisel his way past the bricks I’d built up around my heart? There must be something missing inside me; if he discovered what it was, would it rip through his flesh until we both bled out?
“God, don’t cry.” Noah handed me a napkin, and I blotted my face. “I wasn't trying to hurt you.”
