“Why do I need a professional to tell me I’m fucked up?” he snapped. “It’s already obvious.”
“That’s not what they’re for, Devon. You really think it’s all about diagnosis and not about treatment?” She shifted like she was going to stand and Devon felt a sense of panic run through him.
“Don’t go. I want to talk it out.”
Chloe raised her eyebrows. “I wasn't going anywhere. I was getting comfortable.”
His face flamed and he looked at his lap. “I’ll go to a freaking shrink if you think that’s what’s best for Hailey. I just have to get through the visit with the Keystones first.”
She waited a beat before replying. “I’m impressed. Why did you change your mind?”
Shaking his head, he met her gaze. “I don't know, maybe because you really know how to beat a dead horse.”
“It clearly wasn't dead, and I wasn't beating anything.” She shrugged. “I simply want you to be happy so Hailey can be happy.”
“You're altruistic, then.”
“What can I say, my family are all public servants. It’s in the blood.” She stood then, but she didn’t leave him. “I think the others went to the kitchen. Should we join them?”
“Uh, yeah.” Devon stood, too, but he was reluctant to stop talking to Chloe. Something about her settled him and made him feel better about life.
The others were eating cheese and crackers. Devon saw Maisie was asleep in an automatic swing off to the side of the bay windows. It looked like a scene of domestic bliss, but Devon could only see the worry over unpaid bills because of a lack of work at the shop for him and Caleb. He could see the potential for fights over money, or who was working harder. He only saw the bad in the good, and that wasn’t like him at all.
Obviously, something had to give, but somehow, it all felt too monumental to deal with.
“Devon, you want some?”
He looked up at Lori’s face, smiling as she offered him a plate of fruit. He could pretend for her sake, even if it killed him. He accepted a small bunch of grapes, automatically seeking Chloe. He found her at the table with Alicia, so he propped a hip on the edge of it so he could be within her radius of warmth.
He didn't notice the way Caleb watched his every move and analyzed the hell out of it.
Chapter Eighteen
Devon made sure toclean every nook and cranny of his parents’ house before the Keystones arrived, knowing they would inevitably find something not up to their standards. He didn't parent correctly, keep house correctly, have a reliable job, on and on. There was never a time they liked him or approved of him. If he hadn't had the upbringing he had, with parents who praised him for hard work and achievements, he would have major self-esteem issues after spending any time with his in-laws. Anyone would struggle with self-esteem issues after a visit with them.
Like a kid dreading shots, he watched the seconds slip by on the clock. The stone in his gut grew until it filled the back of his throat, making him swallow convulsively. Hailey waited next to the couch in her wheelchair, eager as any of them for the visit to be over. Caleb and Lori were in the kitchen with Maisie, offering emotional support while not intruding. Lydia and Don waited in the living room with them; since it was their house, they figured they had the right to be there.
