“Well, I hate to break it to you, but I donotprevaricate. Speaking of which, you look like shit. We should go in so you can sit down and warm up.”
With a grunt, he walked past her into the house. He opened the beer he held and drank deeply, fishing out a new one from the cooler on the counter. He opened it and drank, hearing Chloe come in behind him. She kept going into the front part of the house. If he’d been capable of guilt, he might have dredged some up for the way he acted, but . . . too late.
He brought his beer when he joined the others. There were plenty of people he recognized and a few he didn’t. Choosing a chair in the corner of the room, he sat near to those talking but not right next to anyone. He shivered, belatedly realizing he’d spent too long outside. The men nearest him spoke of a remodel one was doing, and Devon pretended he’d come to be social. They spoke at length about the type of wood and the materials for the kitchen cabinets. Devon hated the man for doing it himself but kept quiet about his opinion.
As people shifted, lingered, moved on, and came back, Devon remained solidly rooted to his chair. It left him alone more often than not, and he enjoyed the solitude when he had the chance. The murmur of voices tended to be low with an occasional bout of laughter. Midnight drew nearer, and he watched Lori and Caleb become closer friends with John and Alicia. He got up when his drink was empty, bringing more than one when he returned and tucking them next to his hip so they couldn't be seen easily.
After some time, Chloe sat beside him. Her scent was subtle, but he recognized it without looking up. “I’m leaving.”
She angled her body so she could face him. “It’s not midnight yet. Don’t you want to ring in the new year?”
“No, I mean . . . I’m getting the hell out of Merrimac.” Leaning back, he closed his eyes and pretended it wasn't because he couldn't meet her focused gaze.
“Where will you go?”
“Any-fucking-where.” He paused while his brain turned over the ideas he’d kept to himself. “I have nothing left. Business is going down in flames, friends are even worse. No one needs me.”
“No one?” she said sharply. He opened his eyes and tried to focus on her. Her hair was up. Some kind of braided thing. He preferred it down. “Hailey needs you. Your parents need you;Calebneeds you.”
Devon waved a hand to negate her words. “Pfft.”
“You can't be serious with this shit, Devon. Tell me it’s the alcohol talking.”
“Nope. It’s been festering for a long while now.”
“It’s the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard.” Chloe leaned toward him, her forearms on her knees. “You can’t leave town without your daughter.”
“Look,” he mumbled. He cleared his throat and tried for a more authoritative tone. “Look. It would be best if they started over without me.”
“No.” Her glare deepened. “Hey,” she snapped her fingers when his eyes drifted closed. “Not only are you cut off, but we are going to have a serious talk about this when you’re sober.”
“Don’t wanna.”
“Unbelievable,” she said. “You need to go to therapy, as I’ve mentioned more than once. You need to rememberyouare what your daughter needs, even when you’re fucked up. More, she needs you healed so she can heal.”
His laugh sounded bitter. Someone turned their way and then back. “Hailey needs me to go far away where I can’t hurt her anymore.”
She stood. “Fuckingcoward.”
Now she had his attention. “The fuck does that mean?”
“Just that.” Chloe walked off, leaving Devon with the distinct impression he’d disappointed her. Wouldn't be the first time or the first person.
“What the hell was that, brother?”
Devon craned his neck to look up at Caleb. “I guess I said a few things she didn't like.”
“You need to get your drinking under control. It’s not cool.”
He knew things were bad if he’d pissed Caleb off. “I won’t have any more, okay?”
Caleb watched him for another few seconds before leaving him to stand with Lori. Someone turned the television on to hear the hyping of the countdown.
Devon wanted a stiff drink, but he went to the kitchen for a bottle of water instead. He didn't need to see all the couples kissing at midnight. He felt a stir of nausea and tamped it down. Water would help.
Just as he finished the bottle, Chloe came in. He watched her warily, thinking she would lay into him again. He didn’t appreciate being called a coward for trying to do what he thought was right. The other party goers could be heard shouting in the background as Chloe came to a stop in front of him.
“5!”
