When Caleb patted him on the shoulder, his eyelids might as well have been glued shut. "Devon, open your eyes."
He sucked in a strangled breath and did as he was told.
The room was dimly lit. He shivered again in the arctic chill and tried to focus on what was in front of him. He felt sweat on his palms and was grateful Chloe hadn't let go despite that. He didn't think he could handle it if he had to be there alone, and she was the only one to see Hailey since they'd found her.
"She was in a well," she murmured, and Devon flinched at the loudness of the sound. "It was shallow and dried up. The estimate is that it's ten feet deep, maybe a little more. The search dogs found her."
"On the mill lands?" Caleb asked.
"Yes. On the outer perimeter of their land. I was there with my mother and a few of the other men, including Sergeant Hurley. Rex, the Search and Rescue dog that found her, has been in service for many years. He's a pro."
"What—" Devon had to stop and swallow again. Finally, he looked more closely at his little girl, spotting the swelling and bruising, and had to turn away. He had to cover his mouth with his fist as bile rose sharply in the back of his throat.
"Take your time," Chloe soothed, running her hand lightly over his back.
"I really am going to puke," he choked out as he stumbled to the nearest trash can and threw up.
Caleb was there to hold his shoulders, to offer him a tissue the woman handed over. Devon took it and wiped his mouth, his eyes closed and his breathing labored.
"I need air. I can't breathe."
"Okay," Chloe said. "I can take you to the employee smoking area on this floor. It's not the freshest air, but it's closer than going out the front doors."
Devon could only nod. He took two steps to the door before he halted. "Caleb, please stay with her. I don't want her to be alone like that."
The three of them stood motionless for half a minute, all of them with tears on their faces. Caleb nodded and Chloe led Devon out and down the hall, still providing support with her hand on his back. She seemed to know her way around, but he didn't have it in him to question her. She tried to wipe her eyes surreptitiously, but he saw her anyway. His breath hitched. Maybe later he would be grateful for all the help he'd received, but for the moment he only felt sorrow.
When she opened a door marked Employees Only with a badge she pulled out of her pocket, his brows went up. He knew she was a dispatcher, and yet she had employee access here in this place. Cold air washed over his heated body as she pushed the door open so he could step outside onto the small concrete balcony and gulp in clean air. They were alone, and he was grateful for that. He smelled the faint tinge of stale cigarettes, heard the traffic from the street below. People were going on about their lives while he was destroyed.
After a few moments of peace, Chloe spoke. "We can provide you with counseling services, Mr. McMillan."
"It's just Devon. My dad is Mr. McMillan." Leaning on the cold stone railing, the scratch of concrete against his palms grounded him. "I don't know where to go from here. I don't know what's next."
"The investigation is not closed simply because she was found." Chloe hummed very quietly for a second. "I'm not known for being socially adept, Devon. I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing. I tend to speak in cold hard facts, as John likes to remind me."
"It's fine," he said as he stared out over the part of town he could see. There were a few lights past the street the building was located on. They were facing a small neighborhood encroached upon by the forest.
"Um, there will be tests done, of course, on her—"
"Hailey."
"Yes, on Hailey, and on the well and the surrounding area. How she got there, why she was there—"
"Who did it," he interrupted her once more.
"Will be the top priority of the police department," she said in a hardened voice. "My mother won't stop until they figure out what happened, Devon, I can promise you that."
He took several deep lungfuls of air before turning to face her. "I need to go back and see her again."
"Yes, of course."
They followed the same route back to the room Hailey was in, pausing so he could take another deep breath before pushing the door open. He found Caleb sitting in the chair next to her, holding her hand. The never-ending tears fell down his cheeks as he stared at his younger but much larger brother bent over his tiny, broken daughter's hand.
Though he tried to choke back a sob, he wasn't able to keep it locked in. He wanted to pick her up, to hold her in his arms and feel her warm body curl into his. He wanted her cheek pressed under his neck while she asked for another story. He wanted to wash the hair that was matted and covered in God knew what until it was soft again and smelled of her watermelon shampoo. He wanted her to get up, to walk across the room and jump in his arms. He wanted her to dance again, to sing a silly song.
"Fuck."
It was the only thing they heard before Devon sank to his knees.
