Chapter Seven
Devon couldn't movefast enough as he raced down the hallway toward the nearest desk. Caleb was right behind him, his long legs the only thing making it possible to keep up with his brother’s frantic stride. They barely stopped long enough to ask for the room number before bolting for the elevator at the end of the corridor. Devon's chest heaved in its effort to pull enough air into his lungs. It felt as though a tremendous weight rested squarely on his sternum, his forced breaths coming in gasps. Before the passengers could get off, Devon was in the elevator and pushing the button. Caleb's apologies were only a dim noise in the back of his head. Repeatedly, he mashed the button to close the doors as though that would make anything move faster.
When the elevator started moving, he bent at the waist and braced his hands on his knees, doing his best not to pass out. Caleb's hand rested on his back, bringing him a modicum of calmness. He just had to get there. He had to see for himself, and then he could fall apart. Really and truly shatter to pieces, not the way he'd been forced to hold himself together over the past two days which felt more like ten years. Straightening, he wrapped his arms around his stomach, trying to hold his guts inside his body. There might as well have been a black hole there, threatening to suck everything within its reach into its emptiness.
"I'm going to be sick," he murmured as sweat beaded on his forehead.
"Just hold it in until the elevator stops, will ya?" Caleb said it softly, knowing Devon had no choice but hoping to offer some levity to help calm him.
The ding indicated they’d arrived on their floor, and Devon was off like a runner at the mark. Caleb tried to be more sedate rather than plow into people, but he was just as anxious to get there. Devon's pulse beat in his ears as he moved, scanning the plaques hung on every corner of the halls. The surrounding colors blurred as he focused on the door he physically felt was the right one. It beckoned to him as he sprinted, his shoes making an annoying squeak on the polished white floor. He checked the numbers beside each door just in case, but he knew. He felt it.
He felt her.
Stopping just on the other side of the last barrier to his daughter, he suddenly realized he was scared to death of what he would see. Pacing away, he watched Caleb step up to him with a frown on his face.
"What is it?"
"I can't handle this. I'm not strong enough."
"What? Of course you are. You have no choice, Devon. You have to go in there and see for yourself. I'll fucking hold your hand if you need me to." Tears sprung to Caleb's eyes at the thought of not only what they would find in that room, but how his brother was going to react. He wasn't even sure ifhewas strong enough, let alone what Devon would go through as her father.
"I'm going to throw up. I can't do it. I can't." Almost violently, he shook his head from side to side.
"Mr. McMillan?"
They both turned at the sound of the soft, feminine voice. Standing in the doorway of the room that held Hailey was the woman from the search party the day before, though Devon had already forgotten her name.
"Yes?" he rasped.
"I've been sitting with Hailey so she wouldn't be alone. Come on in." Her dark eyes were kind and understanding as she held out her hand. Though it was the beacon of light he needed in his darkest moment, he remained frozen in place.
"Oh God. Is she—is she—" He couldn't continue his sentence.
"It'll be fine." She held her hand out a little farther.
Devon stared at the offering of comfort, of guidance and assurance. He tentatively slid his hand into hers, finding it cool and smooth. Too much chaos swarmed his head for the calm to rush from her hand to the rest of his body.
"Do you want me to stay with you?" she asked. "Your family was notified, but none of them are here yet."
Devon swallowed around a constricted throat as she moved one step forward. He went with her, but found he couldn't answer her question. Another step, and he felt Caleb's hand on his shoulder as they reached the door. His entire body tensed in expectation, his stomach clenched so tightly he was shocked he had managed to keep down the sandwich from hours before.
"Here we are." The woman pushed the door open, and Devon’s eyes slipped closed. Seeing Hailey in whatever state she was found was too much to bear all at once.
She moved, he moved. He focused on the surrounding sensations; the air was icy, causing him to shiver. He’d left the house without a jacket, only putting on his shoes in the car after Caleb thought to grab them. There was the solidity of his brother's body behind him, warm and reassuring. There was the woman's hand squeezing his. Was her name Carla? She felt soft, but strong. She wasn't afraid, but she was removed from the situation in a way he wasn't. He was smack dab in the middle of it, wasn't he? Still, she offered a solace while the storm in his heart buffeted around him. He swallowed again, hearing a whooshing noise he couldn't place. It was faint; not the air conditioning, but something else. The woman—Chloe,thatwas her name—moved once more, the final step to bring him to his daughter.
