“I’ll talk to you later, Mom. Have a nice day.”
“You too. Bye.” She disconnected the call.
He picked up the mug, his hand trembling from holding it all inside. Once again, he’d let his mother get to him. Like every other call between them, the conversation remained impersonal. Not once had she asked about him—how his work was going, or his personal life…nothing. As it had always been, even when he was growing up, her life and her heart revolved around his sister.
And as he always did, he thrust his mother’s words away to join all their other conversations that hurt or left him feeling empty. He gulped his tea and gave himself a moment. Dakota might’ve been a shit human being, but he’d taught Elliot the benefit of self-reflection and taking time out of the day to breathe deeply.
I’m a good person. I deserve happiness. Pleasing myself doesn’t make me selfish.
Feeling a bit better, Elliot finished his tea, brewed another, and was thinking about breakfast when his phone buzzed with a text. Was it stupid that his pulse spiked seeing Win’s name? He was over thirty, not a teenager. And yet he grabbed the phone and hit the screen to bring up the message.
What’s up? Got plans for today?
Elliot gnawed on his bottom lip. All his life he’d been the good son, trying so hard to please his parents and forever coming up short. Just once he’d like to do whathewanted, and not feel guilty.
Not really. Have to go to the supermarket.
He watched the little bubbles dance up and down as Win typed a reply.
Boring. Let’s pick up lunch and go to Prospect Park.
Elliot blinked.
A picnic?
Yeah. By the lake. It’s not supposed to be so hot today. I’ll bring the wine.
His fingers hovered over the screen. Should he? God, he wanted to. What could be better than lying on a blanket, drinking wine with Win? One of the things he’d always longed to do with a boyfriend. But Win wasn’t relationship material, even though he was doing all the right things.
His mother wanted him to visit his sister, but she’d put him in a bad mood, and he liked being positive when he visited Claire. He could go tomorrow. Win, on the other hand, was a busy guy. Besides, after their talk the night before, it looked like Win was trying to show Elliot he wasn’t only interested in sex.
Not that Elliot would mind.
Okay. What time?
Eleven? We’ll pick up food and head over.
See you then.
The day, which had started out like any other, was now filled with possibilities, a word he didn’t often use when it came to his life.
After taking a shower, deciding not to shave, and choosing a pair of jeans that made his ass look its best, Elliot was ready. Nerves tingled through him when the bell rang. Sweat gathered in his palms, and he wiped both hands down the front of his pants and opened the door.
“Hi.”
Win was his usual gorgeous self. He’d trimmed his beard to a light scruff, and all that thick, golden-brown hair tumbled over his brow and hung in waves around his face. The black T-shirt he wore stretched across his chest, and dark-wash jeans hugged his muscular thighs. His faded jean jacket looked like an old friend, and Elliot wouldn’t mind being wrapped inside it.
“You look nice.” Like he’d been doing it for years, Win leaned in for a kiss, covering Elliot’s half-open mouth with his, and Elliot forgot to worry about them only being in this for the sex. Win’s tongue licked along his lips, and he was ready to say to hell with the picnic and drop to his knees right there.
“S-so do you.” Elliot’s hands found their place on Win’s shoulders, and he pressed his cheek to Win’s shaggy hair. “Really nice.”
“This detail is driving me crazy. I’ve never worn my hair this long.”
Elliot touched the waves. “I like it.”
Twinkling hazel eyes met his. “Well, then maybe I’ll keep it.” He made no move to come inside the house. “Are you ready?”
“Yeah. We can pick up sandwiches at Vinny’s if you want.”
