“You don’t give yourself enough credit.” Those long, beautifully manicured fingers shredded the tiny paper napkin. “I’m tired of the scene and have been for a while. A different face every night can be exciting in the beginning, but it soon grows boring.”
“Not to mention dangerous and unhealthy,” I pointed out.
“I’m fine. And like with us, not every time was penetrative sex. But when I start out knowing I’m not going to see the man again once he leaves, I don’t bother to put much of myself out there. We both know what we’re there for.”
“Then why me?” My gaze captured his. “I’m not understanding. You could find anyone to give you what we did.”
“For three years, I haven’t had one night of complete sleep, except if I’d taken a pill. I’d spend the night grappling with all the crap running through my head. But after you?” A quick uptick of his lips. “I had my first restful night in years.”
“I hear they have weighted blankets that might solve your problem.”
“Cute.” He reached out and took my hand, his eyes darkening to a stormy midnight. “But I’m not joking. I want to try again with you. You set the boundaries as to how far we go.”
“And if I said no sex at all? You’d be fine with that?”
“I might freeze my balls off from all the cold showers I’ll need to take, but I’d like to think I can control myself.”
“No coercion? No means no, right?” I couldn’t be certain with Nate touching and kissing me how much resistance I’d be able to put up. The man had an incredible mouth, and even now my lips tingled remembering our frantic kisses.
“Definitely. But I also have a rule. Only one.”
Brow puckered, Nate looked so serious, I couldn’t imagine what it would be. “Okay, what?”
“No one else in our beds. We’re exclusive. And if you find yourself attracted to someone else and want to see him, we break it off. I won’t stand for cheating.”
That surprised me. I didn’t think of Nate as the monogamous type. But I didn’t really know Nate at all.
“Okay.”
“It’s a deal breaker. The worst thing for me is cheating. You don’t want to be with someone, break it off. But to be with two people and lie to one or both? You have to be a special type of scumbag to do that.”
“Uh, yeah…” I grabbed my glass, choking a bit. “I agree.”
“You okay?” Still holding my hand, Nate squeezed it tight.
I nodded, wondering if I was making a mistake, but I continued to sit with Nate holding my hand.
* * *
“No sex, huh?” Frisco cackled and drank the cappuccino I made him. He came by the shop at noon to wax enthusiastic about a new restaurant he’d discovered, and brought me lunch, so I couldn’t get too angry with him.
“Yes. I think we’re being mature about it. I want to make sure I don’t start a physical relationship with someone I don’t know. Again.” I drank my espresso, remembering how I’d dream my days away after being with Jared.
God, what an oblivious fool I was.
“I can’t get sucked into being with someone based only on sex. I made that mistake before, and we know how that turned out.” Thinking of Jared no longer brought that searing pain. “If it’s going to be real between us, sex can wait.”
A faint white milk foam lined Frisco’s lips, and he licked them. “And what does Nate get out of this? I looked him up, you know.”
“Oh, for Christ’s sake, really?”
“Mmhmmm.” Frisco shrugged and drank his cappuccino.
I hesitated a few moments, then sighed. “Okay. What did you find out?”
“Oh? Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to compromise your integrity.” He smirked at me.
“Since you don’t have any, there shouldn’t be a problem.”
