Deciding to play along with his pathetic charade, I encouraged him. “Go on. Tell me how you see it.”
A triumphant smile broke across his face. “Well, we can go right back to how we were. I can come to New York every month or so for meetings and stay a day or two extra. It’ll be a bit of work on my part, but with Heather being so busy taking care of the new baby and all, she won’t mind. Long as I buy her whatever she wants and give her a quick bang or two every few days, we’re good to go.” He took another piece of pie.
“So where does that leave me? Waitin’ around for you? And don’t you care that you’re cheatin’ on her?”
“Honey, I ain’t been faithful since the wedding vows. But forget Heather for a minute. I watch your show. The webcam one.”
My cheeks burned. “Oh?” I managed to squeak out.
“You know there’s no place I can go at home to meet guys. So I go down to my private space in our house and look up stuff on the laptop. Heather don’t care. She’s busy doin’ her own thing. One night I thought I heard your voice, and watched the show to make sure it was you.”
It never occurred to me that anyone I knew would see me. “How?” I whispered. My eyes darted side-to-side to make sure no one was close.
“It was when I saw you naked that I knew for sure. That body…that dick. It was mine for years.”
Had I ever known this man? Here he sat, planning to cheat on his wife, thinking only about his own pleasure.
“What makes you think I want you back? Maybe I’m happy now.”
Bobby set his fork down. “You always said we’d be together forever. You love me. We were together ten years, and you don’t forget that in a hot second.”
“You did,” I spit out. “You’re the reason I had to leave home and my family don’t talk to me. You made your choice, and now you think you can have everything—a wife, a child, and your lover on the side? Well, no thanks. It don’t work like that. I count. I deserve to be number one in someone’s life.” I stood, and with trembling fingers, dug out my wallet and pulled out a five-dollar bill. “Keep the change.” Without looking back, I hustled out of the coffee shop and back to where I wanted to be, with whom I wanted to be with. Harlan.
He had the weirdest expression on his face, and I wondered if something had happened in the short time I was away. For one guilty moment I worried if he’d sneaked in a drink or was a little high.
“You okay? What’s wrong?” I grabbed his arm, and he stared up at me as if seeing me for the first time.
“Are you going to see him again?”
“What? Who? Bobby? I don’t know. Why?” I held him close, my heart pounding. “Does it matter to you? Do you want me not to?”
He gazed at me with an unreadable expression in his eyes, his beautiful face grave. I preferred the less guarded, laughing Harlan, when he let go and allowed himself happiness. I wanted to give him that joy, that happy. Holding him now, I discovered a peace I never had with anyone else.
Then he pulled me close and kissed me, and the world faded to black. Every physical sense homed in on the touch of his mouth to mine and the silky push of his tongue in my mouth. I held him tighter, our lips soft and giving yet fierce and hot, hinting at what lay ahead.
“Hey. That was real nice to come back to.” I brushed the soft hair off his brow. “Everything okay?”
Harlan’s breathing slowed to normal. “Yeah. Um, where’s your friend?”
I shrugged. “I left him at the coffee shop a few blocks down.”
Without responding, he shot me an odd look, left the register desk, and began to pick up the books people randomly left lying around. “I’ll put these back on the shelf.” With his arms full of books, he left me standing, frustrated and confused, but I let it be. I wasn’t working tonight—James was auditioning new dancers, and he’d given Tristan and me, the two senior dancers, the week off—so Harlan and I had the time to talk it out. I planned on letting him know now, though, that Bobby wouldn’t be bothering me again, but we got a rush of customers and I had to take a few phone calls from distributors I knew Race was waiting to hear from.
When seven o’clock rolled around and we closed up, I couldn’t lie—I was happy to lock that door and turn out the light. I caught Harlan stretching and hiding a yawn.
“That was busier than we’d ever been. You did a great job with the customers when I had to talk to those distributors. Thanks.”
“Not a problem. Who knew running a ragtag bookstore would be so much work?”
Side by side we walked home, and I thought how nice it would be if we could do this every night. I hated resenting Man Up and anything that took me away from spending time with Harlan. Once inside the apartment, I went to the bathroom and turned on the shower. I stripped and stepped under the spray, letting the hot water run over me. I quickly soaped and rinsed off, then, wearing only a towel, walked back outside. Harlan stood in front of the kitchen, drinking a can of ginger ale.
“I gotta get dressed, and then you wanna order something to eat?”
“Sounds good.”
I put on a T-shirt and gym shorts and returned to the living room, where Harlan now sat on the sofa with my laptop. It hadn’t been so long that he lived with me, but I’d already begun to think of where he sat as “his” place. The setting sunlight hit his hair, sparking it to a golden halo.
He glanced over his shoulder. “Oh, you’re done. You want pizza or burgers?”
